Controlled

and here I am
unable to sleep
knowing you've crawled
far too deep

missing your hands
missing your stare
missing your laugh
missing your hair

my stomach is wrenching
a witch's brew
to know my
chances with you

repeated rejection
means insecurity
on my part,
but what do I see?

You across the way
being just my bud
hinting more
but I come up dud

I hope I'm wrong
I hope you like me
but what you'd like
I just can't see

It's 5:52 in the morning,
the fourth of July
independence is the last thing
wanting I.