| If you live in Florida you may have recently found out that..... |
| * Coffee and frozen pizzas can be made on a BBQ grill. * No matter how many times you flick the switch, lights don't work without electricity. * Kids can survive 4 days or longer without a video game controller in their hand. * Cats are even more irritating without power. * He who has the biggest generator wins. * Women can actually survive without doing their hair -- you just wish they weren't around you. * A new method of non-lethal torture - showers without hot water. * There are a lot more stars in the sky than most people thought. * TV is an addiction and the withdrawal symptoms are painful. One day at a time, brother. * A 7-lb. bag of ice will chill 6-12 oz cans of Coke to a drinkable temperature in 11 minutes, and still keep a 14-pound turkey frozen for 8 more hours. * There are a lot of trees around here. * Flood plan drawings on some mortgage documents were seriously wrong. * Contrary to most Florida natives' beliefs, speed limit on roads without traffic lights does not increase. * Aluminum siding, while aesthetically pleasing, is definitely not required. * Just because you're over 21 doesn't mean you can stay out as late as you want. At least that's what the cops told me during a curfew stop. * Crickets & frogs can increase their volume to overcome the sound of 14 generators. * People will get into a line that has already formed without having any idea what the line is for. * When required, a Chrysler 300M will float -- doesn't steer well, but floats just the same. * Some things do keep the mailman from his appointed rounds. * Tele-marketers function no matter what the weather is doing. * Cell phones work when land lines are down, but only as long as the battery remains charged. * 27 of your neighbors are fed from a different transformer than you, and they are quick to point that out! * Laundry hampers were not made to contain such a volume. * If I had a store that sold only ice, chainsaws, gas, and generators .. I'd be rich. * The price of a bag of ice rises 200% after a hurricane. * Your water front property can quickly become someone else's fishing hole. * Tree service companies are under appreciated. * MATH 101: 30 days in month, minus 6 days without power equals 30% higher electric bill????? * Drywall is a compound word, take away the "dry" part and it's worthless. * I can walk a lot farther than I thought. |
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