By Stephen Gray
As you all know we created a new nation the other day in the House of Power. All of us in the house were unanimous in the creation of this new nation. Then we all gave each other a standing ovation for our own ingenuity, though some people are saying “self praise is no praise.” But hey, who else will praise us if we don’t do it ourselves? But I digress.
Still, it has come to our attention (we do pay attention at times) that there is some grumbling and dissent in the land from those who elected us. They do not believe that special status should be given to just one province, albeit the motive is impugned to be for votes. We would not do that, would we? Don’t answer that question unless it is in the negative.
Anyway, to dispense any negative thoughts about our motives for creating this nation we have decided to make all the other nine provinces nations as well. This was done after much soul-searching and the vote-gathering potential of this move. We do not like to lose votes as we are all very happy in the House of Power and we did not want to endanger our privileged status come the next election. But I digress again.
As you all know we are a land ruled by the charter (which you the people did not get to vote on individually, the charter was imposed upon you) and it was felt that under the equality section of the charter leaving out the other nine provinces as non-nations would be discriminatory. We are a caring, tolerant, non-judgmental, non-discriminatory society and no way did we want to be hurtful of the feelings of any of the other provinces. Therefore, as I said earlier we are making each of these other nine provinces a nation as well.
We are also bearing in mind that in all these nation provinces there are communities within these nations who might also wish to be given nation status ( it’s all about votes).
Therefore in the search for equality for those who might feel they are a nation within a nation of this nation, we are setting up a Post Office Box for nation applications.
The address is: Make Me a Nation
At the Hill, c/o Parly. Bldgs.
No postal code is needed nor postage. It’s all free courtesy of your tax dollars. If you do not wish to write us, our email address is: makemeanation@parl.ca All applications will be considered for their vote supporting potential.
Here are some examples for those who wish to apply for nation status. Remember these are examples only. Examples you could have are: “Queer Nation” or “Straight Nation” in your title just as long as the word nation is used. The only title you cannot have is “First Nations” as this has already been taken and rightfully so.
In closing, we hope all this information is helpful to all you people out there. After all, where would we be without you? You are our voters and come election time we depend on you to put us back into power in this great nation of nations within this nation. As the old saying goes, “We do it all to you.” Oops, I mean, “We do it all for you.”
Respectfully submitted by your nation creators.
Stephen Gray
Nov. 24, 2006.
graysinfo@yahoo.ca website: http://www.oocities.org/graysinfo