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| You Know You Are a True Greek When: | |||||||||||||||||
| 1) You respond to Rai or Morei. | |||||||||||||||||
| 2) You consider a koboloi to be a stress reliever. | |||||||||||||||||
| 3) Your parents believe that there is a conspiracy behind everything. | |||||||||||||||||
| 4) Your mother gets vicious on Jehovah Witnesses. | |||||||||||||||||
| 5) You bring your Greek flag to WWF event. | |||||||||||||||||
| 6) You know the Greek version of Ms. Cleo, she can tell you your future from the bottom of a coffee cup. | |||||||||||||||||
| 7) You have been so bored in church that you have imagined being Luke Skywalker with your labatha and that the priest was Darth Vader. | |||||||||||||||||
| 8) Fakais help fuel up your house in the winter. | |||||||||||||||||
| 9) Your luggage smells like: oregano, ouzo, figs, kefalotiri, loukoumia etc. It is also wrapped with string. | |||||||||||||||||
| 10) You have raised booze money by singing the kalanda. | |||||||||||||||||
| 11) Survivor and Big Brother are a joke after having spent a summer in the Horio. | |||||||||||||||||
| 12) You know that there is no mouthwash or toothpaste strong enough to conquer tzatziki. | |||||||||||||||||
| 13) You know that in Greece taxi driver means tour guide. | |||||||||||||||||
| 14) Your family argues over: Pasok vs. Nea Demokratia, Olympiakos vs. Panathinaikos, sheep vs. goats, feta vs. kefalotiri, & land vs. money, etc. | |||||||||||||||||
| 15) The closest you have come to winning the lottery is finding the flori in the Vasilopita. | |||||||||||||||||
| 16) You know that the term "Car Pool" in Greece means 3 on a donkey. | |||||||||||||||||
| 17) Somebody calls out your name at a family gathering and 5 people respond. | |||||||||||||||||
| 18) Your father still has Greek 8-Track tapes and a player. | |||||||||||||||||
| 19) Your parents know "Horiatika Martial Arts", they are trained with such moves as: the "traditional skabeelee", the always-dangerous "anapothee", the "sto dialo sfaliara", and the torture techniques, which involve the pulling of the ears or sideburns. | |||||||||||||||||
| 20) Your parents are also trained to use weapons such as: The "kolo killing koutala", the "flying padofla", the "lethal loureeda", and let's not forget a classic: The "vicious vairga." | |||||||||||||||||