Moans of the Year
Missed a Moaning of the Month? I kindda doubt it since I don't write them as often as I would like to but just in case, I present you the archives! Enjoy and should you have any comments, feel free to email me or sign my guestbook.
This month's topic: Why sidewalks should have yellow lines in the middle
Were you ever a victim of gangs lounging about on the sidewalks? Or couples walking hand in hand with no concern whatsoever for other pedestrians? Or families with youngsters in tack? Did you ever have to jump off the sidewalk or flatten yourself on the wall flanking the sidewalk? Then you know what I am talking about. Pedestrians are incredibly distracted, careless and selfish. They walk side by side, forcing someone that crosses their path to move out of their way or be crushed. They stop without warning, either to look at something (crucial, I'm sure) or when they meet someone they know. Then they just stay there, in the middle of the way, forcing everybody else to dance around them. If they were driving, their license would be revoked in a flash! Don't get me wrong, I am not an anti-pedestrian-frustrated-driver. I don't even own a car! But I do think some laws that apply to driving should be applied to pedestrians too. Never mind crossing on a red light or just jaywalking. All I ask is that you keep your right when you walk so that someone that crosses your path has a safe place to walk and doesn't have to dodge cars in the street. And leaving the sidewalk to those who actually walk instead of talking to your friends in the middle of the way would be nice too. In any case, trying to get out of your bubble and care about others once in a while is pretty healthy.
That's my opinion and I share it.
This month's topic: Why I hate Rap
No I'm not "in". I hate Rap! Why? Let me explain...
First of all, did any of you Rap fans ever listened to the lyrics of those songs (if you can call rambling in a hoarse voice singing)? How can a woman in her right mind dance to a music that promotes rape and violence against women? And I won't even start on the "cool drug thang"...
Second, the music itself. People are complaining that today's pop music is the same tune sang by different people. What about Rap? Rap is one groovy bass line with a few guys or gals talking about something (usually the same thing from song to song) in a "cool way". Talk about the same tune!
Finally, you would think that Rap fans are simply deaf. When you can hear the car 3 blocks away from your apartment and that it actually shakes the whole place, I think something is wrong! I don't hear the music from my young 14 year old neighbour but I can feel the bass to the core of my being. It feels the same way as when you enter a bar and you can feel the bass resonate in your heart. I don't impose my musical tastes on other people. Why can't Rap fans do the same?
Rap is just another musical deviation from the Blues. Personally? I prefer to listen to the real thing.
That's my opinion and I share it.
This month's topic: Why some teenagers should be shot at birth
Some teenagers are so annoying! I remember being a teenager, not that long ago. Some seem to think I still look like one (runs in the family)! But really I don't remember picking on someone on the streets and harass her/him for no reason. I don't remember forcing people out of the sidewalk because my friends and I HAD to walk side by side. Nor laughing at someone because of her/his clothes, hair or weight. Not at her/his face anyway! Hell, the worst I did was being rude to and/or have verbal fights with my mum! Don't get me wrong, I did stupid things, I party-ed and I generally thought of myself first for a few years. I even had suicidal tendancies for a while! But I never directed the feelings of violence I had in me towards others. I never acted on the urge of harming someone, as hurtful that someone might have been to me. And I never understood how the harassment of others could be a source of never-ending fun to some teenagers.
But lets face it: most "adults" I meet are not more polite and still think that the world revolves around (or even belongs to) them. How can we expect our youth to act differently and grow up if they see us acting like that and get away with it everyday?
This is my opinion and I share it.
This month's topic: Why don’t you people flush in a public washroom?
I don’t get it. Don’t you flush at home? Even when you « miss » the first time, I’m pretty sure you bother to try a second time. Even when the mechanism is blocked or doesn’t work properly, I’m positive you try your best to clean up your mess. At home that is. So why is it so difficult to do the same in a public washroom? What, do you think there is a little gremlin who will clean up after you when you leave? What is wrong with you? Nobody will, especially not the next person in line who’s first reaction will be to change stalls! Ever happened to you? You wait for your turn patiently and when it’s finally yours, you enter the cubicle to find out someone made a mess of things. Frustrating isn’t it? Then why, oh why, do you inflict this on someone else? Is it about revenge, then? It’s definitively selfish. And girl, I know seating on a public toilet seat is not recommended but when you leave your trace on it, be a big girl and clean it up afterward. Otherwise it’s utterly disgusting! My point is: the public washroom should be a clean and hygienic place, the same as at home. Grow up and be responsible for your actions in public.
This is my opinion and I share it.
This month's topic: Why do they heat the bus so much?
Don't you hate it when you finally get on the bus after having waited for over half an hour in the cold to see your bus driver wearing only a light short-sleeve shirt? You, of course, are wearing at least 3 layers of shirt and sweaters, a scarf, a warm winter coat, and probably gloves or mittens. At first the almost glowing warm inside the bus seems pure heaven... until you start sweating in your nice winter coat. You take off your mittens, open up your coat and unroll your scarf from your neck. Aaahh better. But then the bus is swallowing more and more passengers and soon you feel dizzy because of all the heat those warm-dressed bodies are radiating. You can feel sweat on your forehead, your back, even the back of your knees but since the bus is now full, you can't take off your coat. All you can think about is getting out of that heat, man! Presently you think about the bus driver who's happily driving the bus in his Hawaïan shirt and you hate him. Why does he have to heat the damn bus so much? Can't he wear a pullover or something? Can't he understand that his customers are wearing cold weather apparatus and that at some point they'll have to get off the bus, in the cold, catching their death in the process with all this sweating?! I'm telling you, I have less and less sympathy for bus drivers and their revendications... I mean, we pay for it, public transit is not free. Shouldn't we get a polite and adequate service? And please turn off the heat a little!
This is my opinion and I share it.
This month's topic: Never underestimate the power of a man to underestimate a woman...
One of the great advantages of being a woman is how guys underestimate you on the subject of cars, computers and mostly every technological toy. It helps if you look like a very young woman like I do (I still get my ID asked for when I go out and I'm over 25!).
And while they are busy underestimating you, here's what you should do to exploit the situation to your advantage :
The first rule when you shop for that kind of toys is to be prepared. Since I love gadgets, I usually do some research before shopping for it and I usually know what I'm looking for (and what I DON'T want).
The second rule: Find a place where you like the salesperson, where you feel comfortable and where you feel they will sell what you really need, not what they want you to buy. I prefer to pay a bit more and be sure of what exactly I'm getting into when buying the damn thing.
The third rule: Ask questions, even if you feel like an idiot. The salesperson's job is to explain and help you understand a minimum about the "toy", not just sell it to you. If he/she (I must admit some saleswomen are as bad as their male counterparts) makes you feel like you should know already, maybe its because he/she doesn't know either! It happened to me at least once, when I was shopping to buy a trumpet. After a few minutes of asking him questions I realised the guy knew next to nothing about musical instruments (and he was so arrogant!).
The fourth rule: Do not let the salesperson give you crap even if he/she is intimidating. Never buy when you feel underpressure. I have at least 10 brand new pairs of shoes in my closet that I never wear because even if they are very pretty on my feet, they are way too uncomfortable to wear for more than 10 minutes! But the salesperson kept pressuring me, telling me that was her last pair and that they looked so good on my feet, etc... so I bought them. BIG mistake.
Finally the fifth rule: Do not let the salesperson get to you. I don't mean to act like a spoiled brat; they're maybe hired to help you but they are not your servant. What I mean is that they deserve to be treated with respect if they treat you with respect. Otherwise, fellow female shoppers, here's my secret: to know if the salesman is being sincere or if he is trying to screw you (excuse my language), look at him with huge eyes, looking a little lost and say in a doubtful voice : "but, I thought that... ". If he's being patronizing, trying to make you buy without explaining the advantages and inconvenients of each model with a "don't bother your sweet little self with the specs, all that means is that this one is better", then don't buy there. In those cases, I usually make sure the salesman thinks I'm gonna buy the most expensive model in the store, smile at his jokes, take more time than I need to and when he's about to punch the purchase on the cash register (or computer) I stop him, telling him I changed my mind and leave.
Of course, I make sure I don't need to go back there...
This is my opinion and I share it.
This month's topic: why mothers should not die
Ok, I admit, this is not the usual moaning of the month against humanity’s stupidity. It has more to do with grief, Christmas time and fatigue. So I will understand if you prefer to pass and come back for the new moaning of the month (whenever that might be). I won’t be offended, insulted or even feel rejected. This is something personal that I need to air, but I don’t want to force anyone to deal with my psychosis!
Now back to our subject.
So why am I bitching against the world order as it has been for eons, i.e. people die every day for no good reason? Because some deaths or just too unfair to accept. Because I don’t understand how succeeding in raising 3 children by yourself (and giving them more than what they need to survive in this world) while working at a pitiful wage could win you an early death. Just when her 3 kids were almost grown-up and independent citizens, when she could have had some time (and money!) to spend on herself, Life just grabbed what was left of her and took it away.
I’m not saying this was the worst thing to happen. A friend of mine lost a child and I’m pretty sure it is way more devastating than losing your mother when you are almost 30 years old.
All I am saying is that Life is unfair. I’ve known that for years but when I lost my mother to cancer 2 years ago (I couldn’t even write about it before now, it hurt too much), I felt like someone was telling me that working hard and being a good person was not worth it. That you could be punished just when you should have had some reward. And for a while there, I almost lost faith in everything.
My mum, see, was one of those wonder-women people talk about. She could do about anything she put her mind to. She knew everything about everything and in the rare cases she didn’t, she would search until she found out what she needed to know. She had a never-ending curiosity about our society, our planet’s history, and arts. She had opinions that differed from most people about how to live our life, socially, culturally and at home. She taught us to be tolerant of others, open-minded to difference, not to be prejudiced about anything and mostly to care about our world and what was going on around us. She had a very good idea of what women were capable of, i.e. anything they put their mind to, and taught us by her example.
I’m not saying she hated men, as she had a few in her life that she really cared about and loved. And she never thought my brother was more of a pain because he was male. We three were all equally a pain, in our own personal way!
Since she died, I feel like I’m tight-rope walking without a safety net. I know my family is there for me in time of need, and I’m grateful. But my mother helped and gave me in a way that nobody ever did, and I miss her terribly. She loved me unconditionally, gave without reservation, and always helped me with her wisdom (as long as I was willing to help myself).
Mum, I wasn’t always a good daughter but I hope you know how much I loved you.
This month's topic: What makes an expression “cool”?
I’m asking you, what makes an expression “cool”? Answer: repetition. No need for many people to use it, only one or two. As long as they say it very often, repeat it over and over, use it for every occasion and annoy their friends with it as much as they can. Soon, the same friends who couldn’t stand the expression will use it without even thinking about it. Then it will contaminate more and more people until the expression is part of our day-to-day language.
Don’t believe me? Ok, let me give you an example: remember the expression “twit”? Some of us still use it from time to time but it’s not a cool expression anymore. Well, once upon a time (about 15 years ago), the brother of my boyfriend (at the time) heard it somewhere and thought it was a funny word. He used to say it 1000 times a day, despite the fact that we menaced to drown him in the toilet. Nobody I knew then used the word, or even knew about its existence. It took about 4 months and most people at school were calling each other “twit” all the time. Hell, Hollywood even integrated the expression in the movie “Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves” (said by Prince John, played by wonderful actor Alan Rickman).
Not convinced? Here is another example: my boyfriend is a John Carpenter’s fan, or more exactly a fan of his movie “The Thing”. My bf has seen this movie hundreds of times and knows the dialogues by heart. He quotes them on a regular basis in our day-to-day life. I’ve never seen the movie (and I won’t… too scary!!) and I’m not really interested in knowing more about it, even if I do like John Carpenter as a director and just love Kurt Russell as an actor. Could you believe that I caught myself quoting the movie more than once a blue moon? Eh oui!
It’s like brainwashing! If your brain processes the same information repeatedly, it will get used to it and could even be tricked into thinking the expression is not a “dorky” one anymore but a “cool” one. Brainwash works! Why do you think the adverts on TV are shown so many times? So that you remember the brand when you go shopping!
Therefore, next time you use the word “kewl” (cool), think about it. Is it because you like that expression or is it because everybody else is using it and you got used to it?
This is my opinion and I share it!
This month's topic: Why couples use pet names for each other?
Yes, I was one of those who laugh at couples. Not all couples, just couples who, in my opinion, were too mushy to be true. I couldn’t understand why they would call each other “baby” or “bunny”. “Love” or “my love” was acceptable but almost nothing else, and especially not “dear” or “honeybunch”! *shivers*
Then I fell in love and, most surprisingly, became the (usually) happy half of a couple. I promised myself I would not become one of those women that nag their man and humiliate him by calling him “mon lapin” (bunny) in public. I know I didn’t always keep my promise about not nagging him but I thought I kept my word about not humiliating him.
Until I heard myself calling him “chéri” (dear) in front of a sales clerk. Moi?!
I guess I’m lucky because he didn’t take offense. He actually finds it cute when it happens (because it happened more than once, I’m ashamed to say)!
That got me thinking… Why, would I do that? Why would I use a stupid pet name? Especially since my boyfriend has a beautiful first name?!
The only thing I could think of is this: I was tired of saying his name. I realized that after a few years of calling, whispering or screaming (!) his name, I unconsciously tried to find another way to call him to me. “My love” is great in movies but quite unpractical in real life. “Sweetie” is fine if a bit too… well, sweet. And I believe my mind decided it needed some variant names.
That’s how it all started. I don’t really care anymore if I use pet names like “honey” or even “baby” since he doesn’t mind. I just try to stay away from “dear” and all those mushy names like “honeybunch”.
At least my mind didn’t betray me completely… I never called him “mon lapin” in 8 years!
This month's topic: Why are you parking so damn close to me?
I have been working for a huge company since last January (2006) and I have to park my car in the even bigger parking lot every morning, than take the shuttle from the parking lot to the office. Except on weekends, of course!
Every day, it’s the same thing: I go round and round, looking for a parking space not too far from the shuttle stop, like a shark hunting for its prey. While I’m doing that, I notice cars parked outside the lines, crooked, taking two parking spaces or parked so close to the next car, the driver probably had to weight no more than 80 pounds to get in and out of his/her car.
So I’m asking myself, why? Why, why, why? Is it so hard to park between the lines, to leave enough space between your car and the next one so that the other driver doesn't have to squeeze him/herself in and out of her/his car? And don’t even get me started about scratches or dents on my car’s doors!!
Why be so selfish? Why refusing to think about the consequences of your actions? Why do the rest of us should be punished because you did not want to take two more minutes to park your car in a proper manner? Why is it so hard to be considerate of others?
Some say they are fed-up of making all the efforts while others don’t have to. Tired of being “good” in an “evil” world. I tell them, if you stop making the effort, than you are going to piss off someone else, who will have the same reaction as you and stop too. You’ll become what you despised. Then where will that lead us? Life is a circle, and this is a vicious one.
I will say it and say it again, the world does not belong to you!! It belongs to all of us, and we have to try to share it in a harmonious fashion or we will extinct ourselves!
This is my opinion and I share it!
This month's topic: Why I have a weakness for 80’s music
Yes, I have a weakness for 80’s music.
Yes, I like Parachute Club, Duran Duran, Luba, and The Thompson Twins. Don't you forget Dire Strait, Corey Heart and Blondie. I even have a little place in my heart for Culture Club and Michael Jackson!
Aaaah nostalgia…
I grew up listening to these bands/artists on the radio and on badly dubbed tapes, and yes, I can still sing along to most of their hits.
Why?
Here is my theory: I listened to that music when I was a teenager, full of hormones and suffering from extreme mood swings. Music was sometimes the only safe release for my emotions (writing in my journal and fighting with my mum a close second and third option!), and the music usually came from the hit list aired by most radio stations.
Emotional, and in pain, I turned to that music, to the lyrics that, in my state of mind, really hit home, even though I did not speak English very well at the time. Even though most of the lyrics from the 80’s were really weird!
I remember crying while listening over and over to “Hold me now” (Thomson Twins), feeling my hunger for love (and lust!) resonate at the sound of “Hungry like the Wolf” (Duran Duran), smiling and even laughing out loud at the lyrics of “Money for Nothing” (Dire Straits).
Everything is so intense when you are a teenager; when something hits home, it leaves a mark.
That theory works for most people. Ask a Baby Boomer what she feels about the music from the 60’s. Not what she thinks, but what she feels. I bet she will have a smile for some hit, from some band from that era. It does not matter if the song is actually good or not. The feeling is there. The emotion is too strong to be denied.
So, even though my musical tastes have evolved (I’m more into the blues now), whenever I hear “Sunglasses at Night” (Corey Heart), my heart skips a beat and a lot of emotions bubbles up to the surface.
“(And) I wear my sunglasses at night So I can so I can Keep track of the visions in my eyes”
Yeeeaaah, Corey! *whistles* You’ll always be in my heart!
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