Email: gwyh99@yahoo.com
Date: 8 June 2001
Archive: ummm… rather not, thanks.
Rating: PG for mature subjects
Classification: Vignette, Romance, Angst
Keywords: Mulder/Scully, post-ep, Scully POV.
Spoilers: season 8 flashback ep called Per Manum. This set after the 7th season episode All Things.
Summary: Just what was Scully doing in Mulder’s bedroom anyway? Warning: contains spoilers for the season 8 flashback episode Per Manum!!

Author’s notes: I’m respectfully borrowing part of this storyline from Little Miss’s Stargate SG-1 series After Hours. Thanks so much for letting me take it out of the Stargate Universe and put it to the test with Mulder and Scully, hun. And thanks again for a wonderful beta-job.

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Sleeping

He ditched me. Again. He left me to cramp up into a pretzel all by myself on his ‘sofa’. Instead of taking me into his wonderfully big warm bed. With down comforter. He knows how much I love his comforter, yet he leaves me to freeze and cramp up on his sofa! Damn him!

It’s not like we’ve never shared his bed before, and I can’t imagine he just conveniently forgot about all those nights we did this past month! The man’s insecurities drive me well and truly insane sometimes!

I dump the old newspapers into the box next to the dishwasher with a satisfying thud. God, he’s got me so riled up, I’m cleaning house! At 7am. And he’s got me waiting. Cos I know he’s going to call.

Well, he’s not gonna pull his psychological tricks on me and make me feel guilty. No way!

He ditched me twice in one week, first the crop circles, now this. What was I supposed to do? Wait for him to wake up, then be nice and friendly and ask if he slept okay? I think not!

So I’m not gonna let him make me feel guilty. He needs to know he can’t just ditch me like that without repercussions. Dammit.

The phone rings and I stomp into the living room, where I grab the phone from it’s cradle.
"Yes," I hiss, my voice as cold as I can make it. It’s not a question, I know it’s him.

"Scully?" His voice is still rough with sleep.

"Has your speed-dial ever misdialled my number?" I reply icily. Yes, I’m angry with you, Mulder. So deal.

There’s a silence. He’s no doubt processing what he just heard in my voice. I hear him draw a shuddering breath. And my anger wavers.
"Scully? What happened tonight?" he asks, sounding for all the world like a 12-year-old boy, who knows he’s done something to seriously upset his mom, but can’t for the life of him figure out what it was.

And I melt.

I promised myself I wouldn’t let him do this to me, but he just did. And I can’t even be angry about it.
I just can’t be at odds with him, not now, not ever again. Not after everything that’s happened.

"Mulder? Come over?" My voice is small, I sound like a little girl lost. And that’s how I feel when I can’t lean on him. And I need his strength now, I need be able to lean my back against his chest while I sort through all those revelations of the past few days.

I hear a click, and the line gets disconnected.

While I wait those 20 minutes that it takes Mulder to get from his apartment to mine, I wonder why I do this?
Why do I push him away when I need him most? Why do I turn my anger on him, when I’m just as guilty of creating a distance between us as he is? What is it that I’m so damned afraid of, that I push the only person I can truly rely on, the only person I can truly trust with my life, away when I need him most?

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