I love Anime... if you do not like Anime, then shut the Hell up and let me enjoy my cartoons! NINJA SCROLL is based in feudal Japan (the days of samurais and ninjas and clans and shit, you know, before they made Nintendo) where a young warrior named Jubei beats the snot out of a gang of punk-ass thieves and swipes a mystical sword he was hired to retrieve... all w/o dropping his rice ball! Elsewhere, a plague appears to be breaking out amongst some Japanese villages, but when a group of ninjas goes to investigate, they get their asses handed to them (in several pieces) by a big golem guy with some huge fuckin boomerang blade thingy! In the middle of raping a she-ninja, Jubei pops in to teach the golem a lesson in rape and plunder etiquette, stabbing him in the eye and then running off with the she-ninja in tow. Golem catches up to them later though, and Jubei kix his ever-lovin ass (but not w/o getting his chops busted in the process). Thanx to some legend, myth, or tawdry rumor (I forget which), we find out that there are still 7 other A-1 bad guys, as well as some big-boss kinda guy (the kind of guy you find on the last level of SHINOBI). To make Jubei's life all the more worse for wear, an old midget poisons Jubei for refusing to sell his services to the little wrinkle-bag. Now, if Jubei doesn't help out, he won't get the antidote. The she-ninja joins them and they fight a snake woman (this part is WEIRD!), a shadow man (no, not the comic NOR the game), a hunchbacked living bee-hive (cooler than it sounds), a blind swordsman, a living power plant homo, a living bomb, and Gemma (the boss man). Along the way, we find that she-ninja is immune to all poisons, fucking her will get you killed, and the only way to stop the poison in Jubei's system is to play "hide the egg roll" with her. For some reason though, Jubei refuses to pop her, and instead kisses her and buries her hot corpse at sea after she's killed. I suppose that one kiss was enough to save Jub-Jub (heh heh, I mean Jubei), and he chases down the ship Gemma's on for the final showdown. But, since the guy's got this beefed up healing power (that lets him survive even decapitation!) Jubei's only chance is to engulf him in a wave of molten gold! This amazing Anime was followed by the sequel series NINJA RESURRECTION, which I hope to steal from Saturday Matinee or possibly my local Coconuts store. Till then, I will just enjoy this one! Well, this and the pornographic Anime, FIII!

Sequels: the NINJA RESURRECTION series came from this movie

If You Liked This Flick, Check Out: VAMPIRE HUNTER D or SAMURAI SHOWDOWN