The pool is full of pain so you start slowly- dip your big toe in.
Razor poised over your leg: ready to sin.
Never thought it would come to this.
Where you need a lifetime of scars to get a moment of bliss.
Hands shaking so much you fear you'll miss.
All you want is to stop these tears.
All your life people have ignored your fears.
Heart is racing as you watch the door
If someone walks in you'll be lost once more.
Deep down you want them to stop you- stop this becoming real.
Want someone to understand how you feel.
Suddenly consumed by the rage that spills out
Lost the will to scream or the drive to shout.
You now know that this razor is the only way
If only you knew how much you would pay.
One clean cut. Barely feel the pain.
Finally here's a solution- something to keep you sane.
Blood starts to pour slowly down your leg and you gasp.
The fact it's self inflicted is still hard for you to grasp.
Hide under your covers and cry at what you've become
Now your beautiful body is worthless and you feel like scum
With nothing left you carry on
Change til your the person you've now become.
With angry slashes long into the night.
Your a professional now, long lost the fright.
One deep cut, grinding steadily deeper- so deep
Light angry cuts covering your stomach- these ones you keep.
Smiling as you remember the secret only you know
Amazing just how quickly the time can go.
You realise no matter how deep you cut no one will see.
And no matter how often you cut a slasher is all you'll be.
You can't help but wonder when it'll be and who will cry.
When you cut too deep and no one expected you to die.