Punch him in the head! Don’t shake his hand! Jeez…

Could you do a better job preventing another 911? Jeez…no shit. Thanks, blah blah blah…what is this? Answer the damn question, argh. I dunno; maybe that plays well. I believe president bush and I both love our country equally…sure you do. Leading strong alliances, blah. Never give any country veto over our security. Good. Left us shattered or something better plan better etc. Sounds okay…reaching out to the muslim world which the president has almost (“yeah…”almost”) not done.

Our prayers are with…fuck you. September the eleventh changed how America must look at the world. Gawd, he’s unctuous…satisfied smirking. Fuck you, you freak. Ten million people registered to vote in Afghanistan…gotta check that. America and the world, safer…sure…Libya has disarmed…full. Shit. Shit. Full. Shit. Of. Free nations, free nations, free nations…

Will we be hit if Kerry is reelected? “I don’t think that’s going to happen. Because I’m going to win. Answer the goddamn question you slimey little weasel. Can’t STAND the idea of losing; that’s why he won’t. Dumbass platitudes. Killers who will not only kill here but kill children in Russia—hurrah for climbing over corpses for votes! Never waver, etc…sure, we’re not wavering. And at the same time spread liberty. Ten million citizens again. He’s asking for it…in Iraq…an enemy understands that a free Iraq will be a major against hatred. Uh huh. Good thing that’s not happening.

Strong, resolute, and determined. Will hunt down and kill terrorists, blah. Tough talk. But not divert attention from real war on terror. 911 commission confirms no relation. Haw. President has made colossal error of judgment. Indeed. Important military figures supporting me. Litany of generals…all believe I would make a stronger commander and chief. Yeah! Unfortunately, Osama escaped…did we use American forces. No! Outsourced that job too. Heh, indeed.

What colossal misjudgments. Must be incredibly nerve-wracking up there. Bush said he’d do thinks with UN; didn’t want do…”changed his mind—his campaign has a word for that.” Heh indeed. Gotta be able to look into eyes, say I did everything in my power to prevent loss of son or daughter. That was good. 200 billion dollars coulda been used for education health care…people being killed in Afghanistan…forty-sixty percent based on opium…fubared, in essence.

My opponent looked at same intelligence voted for war boy that’s unpredictable. Fuck you you horrid freak of nature. I understand serious consequences. You understand jack you fuck. Decided to go to UN myself. Haw. God you’re smarmy. Kind of a pre-sept11 mentality. God this makes me ANGRY.

What about point vis-à-vis priorities? We got capabilities to do both. Group of folks such hatred in their heart they’ll strike anywhere. “Folks” indeed. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck you. Haw…earlier, Kerry got Saddam and Osama’s names mixed up; now fuckhead did it too. That’s a relief. Of course Iraq is central front war on terror. Sure…we will succeed; we’ve got a plan to do so. Care to share this plan? I imagine not…Alawi strong leader. Cheezus…will be elections in January.

Iraq was not even close to centre of war on terror before fuckhead invaded it…rushed to war without a plan. Not judgment president should make. Without body armor. Body armor for kids for birthday presents from president. Don’t know if he really sees what’s happening…getting worse.

Wants you to forget he authorized use of force. Flip flop bullshit. What message send troops allies? That you’re not insane; I don’t know. Steadfast. Off a fucking cliff, indeed. I will succeed.

Bullshit.

As pres, what would you do for homeland security? What message when 500000 for police in cops, cutting in America? Money in Iraq, not in US…good. Hadn’t done work that ought to be done. This pres thought it was more important to give wealthy tax cut than invest in homeland security. Long before we—fuckhead and I—get tax cuts, let’s do security…pronounces nuclear correctly…quite good, I thought.

Howee gonna pay for all these promises? Huge tax gap. Anyway. For another debate. God he’s lame…maybe by NOT FUCKING CUTTING RICH FUCKS’ TAXES YOU FUCK. Stay on the offense! Heh heh heh…kill, kill, kill. Have to be right hundred percent of time…too late for that, a bit…patridiot act is vital. Stay on offense. Kill! Kill! Kill!

Over hundred thousand hours of unlistened tapes haven’t changed fbi culture you’re full of shit. I think he’s doing well; I really do.

I wake up every day thinking how best to protect America…and then I do the opposite! We’re doing everything we can…terraists justice blah.

When to bring troops home? Uh…let me…first…tell you…train Iraqis. Training training. Never succeed in iraq is they don’t help…hoo boy. I don’t want to bring them home for the sake of bringing them home…and I’m sure they don’t want that either. Heh. Ambassador Negroponte. El Salvador…you can’t bring them out in six months and expect them to begin. My message: thanks, and fuck you. Free Iraq will help secure Israel…oh jeezus.

My message: thanks, but also, help is on way. Yeah! Deserve better. Both looked at me, said, we need you. You gotta help us over there. Comparison to Pa Bush. Good. Let’s piss fuckhead off. Only building guarded oil ministry. Heh indeed. Know what it’s like…troops need other allies. Hold summit! Credibility.

Ma opponent sez help is on way but what does it say when you say the war sucks? Yeah! How dare you say that! Voted against 87 billion bullshit…blah.

Made mistake in way I talked he made mistake with war. Some people don’t like anti-Vietnam—lead troops to victory!

How do you ask a man to be the last man to die for a mistake? Is that what they’re doing? No? How no? Of COURSE they are. Jeezus Creest. President promised to plan carefully. Haw. He didn’t do any of those things. Obviously. Didn’t listen to Shinseki; retired him. Slam. Like invading Mexico in response to Pearl Harbor. Hohoho. This president, no statesmanlike summits—opposite; pushed them away. No no, we’ll do this alone. Haliburton! Good. Mention them again.

That’s totally absurd. Ooh, belligerent. Didn’t have any allies? Duh, Britain. Isn’t Poland leaving? I know how these people think. Uh huh…rargh blargh.

Always American-run. Three countries: us, England, Australia. You forgot Poland! Hyuck hyuck. I don’t appreciate when he denigrates…fuck you fuck fuck fuck. God you’re scum. Coalition will remain strong. Uh, yeah…FUCK. FUCK. FUCK YOU YOU horrible little slime.

It’s all the darn rapid victory’s fault that we’re fucked all to hell. Aw…the darn ol’ rapid victory. Hard work. Oh go fuck yourself. I’m optimistic. Optimistic to hell…makin’ progress there…oh god shut the fuck UP…place where people get their hands cut off—or executed. Pot, meet kettle…

Even knowing everything he’d still go in. Talk the truth. Truth! “Denigrating troops.” But you can’t tell me when England has so little and others have nothing, we’re virtually all. Good chance to attack the coaltion bullshit…while north korea has nuclear weapons.

Accused Bush of lying? Give examples? Never used “lie”—but you should. “Not been candid?” Same thing, innit? Promised coalition…said he’d exhaust UN. Watch fuckhead smirk and lie in response. Mislead, mislead, mislead…we did NOT GO AS A LAST RESORT. Indeed. Important to tell the truth. Worked with leaders longer than this president. New credibility…Osama uses invasion to recruit terrorists. Good; mention that again. Need to deny them recruits, safe havens. Others did that better.

Ma opponent said Osama uses invasion to recruit. I don’t think he was misleading. Jesus Christ. God you slimey fuck. Changed positions. That’s not how a commander in chief axe.

Was not misleading. Would have preferred more. One consistent position. A right way and a wrong way; president chose wrong way.

Only thing consistent ‘bout my opponent’s position; he’s been inconsistent. I expect to win. Of COURSE you do. Barf. Weapons of Mass Destruction. Jeezus. Every life’s precious, every life matters, but I like killing things. Jeezus..anecdote about dead kid. “Love her as best I can.” Please erase this image from my head. Prayed teared up, laughed some. Wugh? I understand stakes. Fuck you you fucking little fuck. Fuck. Saddam Hussein was a threat. Right. Way to defeat hatred etc is to spread freedom. Freedom!

Know what it means to lose people in combat. Is it worth the cost? Vital for us not to confuse war with warriors. Eh? Determined for them to be honored. Choice: summit, better training, elections—only 25 percent; can’t have elections now. Pres plan four words “more of the same.” Yeah!

If I were to say this is wrong war, the poor l’il troops would wonder how can I follow this guy? God, give it UP already, you slimey fucking little toad.

Powell told pres, if you break, you fix. Soldiers know this is fubar. I’m gonna get it right. I have plan; he doesn’t.

Specifics of plan. Specifics timeline etc…that’s the damn problem: soundbite plans. Mislead again this evening. Yeah…many times. Critical component to convince that we’re not there for keeps. Guard oil ministry; not nuclear facility. Didn’t think through; have to think through. Rargh! US has no long-term designs. Indeed. Grr. Admin admits haven’t done training. What greater admission. Ups! Haven’t done the job! Good.

He said he’d change logistics, but Allawi questioned Allawi! Shocking! You can’t criticize our personal apparatchiks! We will keep our word…that would be a first. Stab smash kill. Rejecting notion that some say you’re muslim you can’t be free. Yeah your supporters. Jeezus.

Alawi said terrorists are pouring over border. So there.

Allawi said that ‘cause he knows this is part of war on terror. Fighting us ‘cause they’re fighting freedom. Darn ol’ freedom. We’re going to win this war. Fuh. More or less likely that you would take us on another preemptive…I never wanted to commit troops. But the enemy attacked us, so I had to attack somewhere else. Jeezus FUCK. We would “rue the day” had Saddam been in power. But by speaking clearly—hah! Lookit Libya. Jeez. God you’re the worst kind of scum.

Something extraordinarily revealing and important. Good. He’s bringing up his “the enemy attacked us” bullshit. God don’t let there be an October surprise…outsourced job. Osama! Osama! Saddam woulda been stronger; factually incorrect. Two-thirds of country no-fly-zone. Yeah! Sock it to the fucker!

I know that Osama attacked us—I know that. But you just SAID. You moronic fuckface from hell.

Thirty-five countries had more weapon capabilities. Pre-emptive war? Always has had right; no president has ceded this right…but you’ve gotta do it in way that passes global test where everyone understands and you can prove it was legitimate. SecofState had to apologize for bullshit…heh. De Gaulle didn’t need to see photos in Missle Crisis. Good anecdote, I think. Never take eye off ball. Don’t turn from global warning treaty. Have earning back to do.

I’m not sure what means “passes global test.” Looks like a particularly dimwitted ape, as always. He talks about not signing treaties...wouldn’t join international criminal court. Yeah! We can’t be accountable! It’s a terrible thought! Opponent is for joining icc…I should bloody well hope so. Do you believe diplomacy will work in NK and Iran. Of course I do! All countries except Iraq can be resolved by diplomacy! Naturellement! We can’t open dialogue with Kim Jung Il! That’s JUST what he wants! That yellow devil! Nookyaler.

British French and Germans tried to stop Iran sans us. Okay. We should’ve helped. Yeah. Goddamit. President did nothing. Real story: we had negotiators etc then President reversed Powell’s policy. Caused international embarrassment.

Fuckhead’s sounding pretty incoherent here. Wer wer wer worked to put sanctions on Iran. We worked with them all! Uh huh.

Darfur: what to do? Is genocide; action needed. Not saying “send troops” because we can do through African union…they need help…more than is on table…overextended. That’s fer sure. Backdoor draft. Good thing to mention. If it took American forces: yes. Can never allow another Rwanda.

Darfur: indeed, genocide. Wow, 2000000 dollars…as opposed to in Iraq…? Jeez. Okay, this wasn’t a very contentious question. Are there character issues? Oh Jeezus. “That’s a loaded question.” That’s for sure. What is this? Great dad daughters kind to my daughters. Argh shut up with the fake conciliation. Won’t hold it against him that he went to Yale? What the fuck? He changes positions. I never change positions in any circumstances no matter what! I’m like a charging rhinoceros! I just crash through the undergrowth, smashing through undergrowth, killing the shit out of everything in my way! A deranged rhinoceros, that is.

Appreciate personal comments. And I share them…no, don’t! Argh! Chuckled at their comments. Cut the lovefest bullshit. His wife. Stop! STOPITSTOPITSTOPIT! Jeezus fuck. Issue of certainty…one thing to be certain, but you can be certain and be wrong. Indeed. He’s not acknowledging realities. To put it mildly.

Once you switch tactics…and we will. Um, you just said…oh, fuck it. What’s the fucking use?

No intention of wilting; never wilted/wavered in my life. My position has been consistent. President need authority. Didn’t need to rush to war without plan to win peace. Yeah.

If you’re elected, what do you think is most serious threat? Nuclear proliferation. Indeed. At Pres’s rate, thirteen years. I wrote a book on it. Hah! Take that! Fuckhead’s secured less nuclear material after than before. Pres cut money. Bastard. Let’s kicking ass! Not this president. Shut program down. Damn right. No more nukes. Let’s go. Like Kennedy. Indeed.

Actually, we’ve increased funding. So there. You know he’s lying. He always fucking lies. Fuck. Why can’t we have elections where you can at least respect both candidates? Dammit. Missile Defense. Hoo boy. Is that like Missile Command? ‘Cause I’m all about Missile Command.

Last question already? Putin and Russia? Did you misjudge him, or do you think he kicks ass? Not okay! Yeah, it’s not okay THERE…fuck fuck fuckity fuck. What about seeing his soul? He’s also a strong ally in the war on terror! Yeah! Fascism be damned! I’ve got a good relation with Vladimir. Jeezus, how do you decide whether or not you’re gonna be chummy with the fascists? Remind him of great benefits of democracy…yeah, do as I say…

Had an extraordinary experience of watching USSR change…regret what’s happened. Jeez, I hope so…Putin owns all tv stations. Really? Jeez…as George Will said…agh! Don’t quote him! Just because president says it can’t be done doesn’t mean it can’t be done. Said mission accomplished, war can be fought cheap, etc…rargh! At any rate, Kerry’s going to get the last word…

I’m a pretty calm guy. Calm like a serial killer. Looked at same intelligence, same conclusion…

It was a threat; that’s not the issue. Said he was gonna build true coalition, UN, last resort, words should mean something. Fucking right. Two hundred billion dollars. Closing statements. Oh. I forgot about that. Dammit. And Kerry’s first. Shit. Oh well. Both him and I love country don’t think there’s doubt about that…oh, I do. Oh, yes. Who can get the job done? What kind of world going to grow up in. Defended country as young man, WILL defend it as potus…build strong alliances, etc…America’s best days in front…fat chance. But good luck anyway. Thank you can god bless America.

If America shows uncertainty, weakness…argh…strengthen, blah. Okay, okay…he just has to finish here, and I won’t have to—whoa, he just denied that there will be a draft, though he didn’t use that word. Hah. Yeah, so—won’t have to hear him anymore. God I hate him. Hatred, ire, want him fucking dead. Horrible little weasel from hell. Nothing against weasels. They’re cute. We’ve climbed mighty mountain, see valley of peace below. Uh, yeah. I ask for your vote…go fuck yourself. Phew, it’s over.

Two people—rethuglicans—on cspan have accidentally referred to Kerry as “President Kerry.” Damn right.