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My Better Side |
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Click here for more info on the Nuestra Palabra Organization. "Latino Writers Having their say!" |
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Club Atletico Boca Juniors Aguante Boca! |
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Vamos, vamos los xeneizes, vamos xeneizes vamos a ganar, somos la mitad mas uno somos el pueblo y el carnaval Boca te llevo en el alma y cada día te quiero más. |
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"I think its natural to want nice men to kiss you, so why not do what's natural?" John Steinbeck- Of Mice & Men |
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Learn the story behind the death of Marat |
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WINNERS OF THE "WORST ANALOGIES EVER WRITTEN IN A HIGH SCHOOL ESSAY" CONTEST
He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it. (Joseph Romm, Washington) She caught your eye like one of those pointy hook latches that used to dangle from screen doors and would fly up whenever you banged the door open again. (Rich Murphy, Fairfax Station)
The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't. (Russell Beland, Springfield) McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty Bag filled with vegetable soup. (Paul Sabourin, Silver Spring)
From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and "Jeopardy" comes on at 7 p.m. instead of 7:30. (Roy Ashley, Washington)
Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze. (Chuck Smith, Woodbridge)
Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center. (Russell Beland, Springfield)
Bob was as perplexed as a hacker who means to access T:flw.quid55328.com\aaakk/ch@ung but gets T:\flw.quidaaakk/ch@ung by mistake (Ken Krattenmaker, Landover Hills)
Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever. (Unknown) He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree. (Jack Bross, Chevy Chase)
The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease. (Gary F. Hevel, Silver Spring)
Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie this guy would be buried in the credits as something like "Second Tall Man." (Russell Beland, Springfield)
Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph. (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)
The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the period after the Dr. on a Dr Pepper can. (Wayne Goode, Madison, Ala.)
They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth (Paul Kocak, Syracuse, N.Y.)
John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met. (Russell Beland, Springfield)
The thunder was ominous-sounding, much like the sound of a thin sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a play. (Barbara Fetherolf, Alexandria)
His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free (Chuck Smith, Woodbridge)
The red brick wall was the color of a brick-red Crayola crayon.
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Politics Made Simple
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Do you have trouble understanding politics? If so, the following primer (thanks to the Manitoban - University of Manitoba) should clear it up for you. No bull. Socialism - You have two cows. Give one to your neighbour.
Communism - You have two cows. Give both to the government. The government gives you milk.
Capitalism - You sell one cow and buy a bull.
Facism - You have two cows. Give milk to the government. The government sells it.
Nazism - The government shoots you and takes the cows.
New Dealism - The government shoots one cow, milks the other, and pours the milk down the sink.
Anarchism - Keep the cows. Steal another one. Shoot the government.
Conservatism - Freeze the milk. Embalm the cows.
Liberalism - Give away one cow. Get the government to give you a new cow. Now give them both away. |
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NEW LANGUAGES
Afro-American Speak -- Ebonics ("Ebony" + "Phonics") Irish-American Speak -- Leprechaunics
Native-American Speak -- Kimosabics
Italo-American Speak -- Spumonics (or Rigatonics)
Chinese-American Speak -- Won-tonics
Japanese-American Speak -- Mama-san-ics
Polish-American Speak -- Kielbasanics
Jewish-American Speak -- Zionics
Russian-American Speak -- Rasputonics
Spanish-American Speak -- Flan-ics
Scottish-American Speak -- Tartan-ics
Eskimo-American Speak -- Harpoonics
American Indian -- Pocahonics
German-American Speak -- Autobaunics (or Teutonics)
French-American Speak -- Cornichonics (or Escargonics)
and cats? Catatonics, of course. |
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Inevitable si es cuestión de confesar no sé preparar café y no entiendo de fútbol creo que alguna vez fuí infiel juego mal hasta el parqués y jamás uso reloj y para ser más franca nadie piensa en ti como lo hago yo aunque te dé lo mismo si es cuestión de confesar nunca duermo antes de diez ni me baño los domingos la verdad es que también lloro una vez al mes sobre todo cuando hay frío conmigo nada es fácil ya debes saber me conoces bien y sin ti todo es tan aburrido coro/chorus: el cielo está cansado ya de ver la lluvia caer y cada día que pasa es uno más parecido a ayer no encuentro forma a alguna de olvidarte porque seguir amándote es inevitable siempre supe que es mejor cuando hay que hablar de dos empezar por uno mismo ya sabrás la situación aquí todo está peor pero al menos aún respiro no tienes que decirlo no vas a volver te conozco bien ya buscaré qué hacer conmigo chorus siempre supe que es mejor cuando hay que hablar de dos empezar por uno mismo |
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Math Jokes 97.3% of all statistics are made up.
There are three kinds of mathematicians: those who can count and those who cannot.
Did you hear the one about the statistician? Probably.... "What do you get when you cross an elephant with a banana? Elephant banana sine theta in a direction mutually perpendicular to the two as determined by the right hand rule." What do you get if you cross an elephant with a mountain climber? You can't do that. A mountain climber is a scalar. Why did the cat fall off the roof? Because he lost his mu. What do you call a teapot of boiling water on top of mount everest? A HIGH-POT-IN-USE What's yellow and equivalent to the Axiom of Choice? Zorn's Lemon. What's purple and commutes? An abelian grape. What does a mathematician do when he's constipated? He works it out with a pencil. Why is it that the more accuracy you demand from an interpolation function, the more expensive it becomes to compute? That's the Law of Spline Demand. Ya' hear about the geometer who went to the beach to catch the rays and became a tangent?
My geometry teacher was sometimes acute, and sometimes obtuse, but always, he was right.
Old mathematicians never die; they just lose some of their functions. |
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Send me an Egreetings |
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Mi Buenos Aires Querido |
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www.salsaweb.com |
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My Favorite flowers are Long stem Gardenias, Star lilys and Orange roses I'm sucha girl, I love flowers. |
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The sappiest most romantic book of poems. Neruda is the bomb. |
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Jose Marti |
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Yo soy un hombre sincero De donde crece la palma, Y antes de morirme quiero Echar mis versos del alma.
Yo vengo de todas partes, Y hacia todas partes voy: Arte soy entre las artes, En los montes, monte soy.
Oculto en mi pecho bravo La pena que me lo hiere: El hijo de un pueblo esclavo Vive por él, calla, y muere.... |
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HOME |
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NEXT |
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Other things on my better side International Futbol Latinamerica Psychology Art History Salsa/Merengue Latinamerican Literature Poetry Traveling Business & Finance Spirituality Relationships
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