Jozi's Birthmark / Portwine Stain Page

Many children are born with some form of birthmark somewhere on their body. I have one too. Mine is known as a portwine stain, is red and is on the right side of my face and it's growing... It gets darker when a heavy weather system is on its way in. My mother always said I was her walking barometer! She didn't have to listen to the weather man. One look at me and she knew a storm was coming.

I was taken to a few childrens' hospitals when I was a child, to see what could be done to remove the mark. It covers the area of my right cheek, my right temple into my hair, over my entire eye, some of my eyebrow, down half of my nose and over half of my upper lip and into my mouth. At that time, there were not many techniques available to remove birthmarks. And the success rates of the techniques used were less than desirable. My parents chose not to go with the injected dye, which is basically a tatoo. And I chose not to go with the laser that burned your skin and turned it gray. I still have two small circular scars on my cheek where test spots were done.

Even with all the trials that you go through having such a visible mark on your face, I am very comfortable with it. I actually would keep it and had no desire to remove or reduce it's appearance, until... As I mentionned, it's growing. What does this mean? Will one side of my face puff up beyond recognition? Hardly likely. But there are little nodes that are beginning to appear in my birthmark. Raised bumps that look like a mole or a skin tag. I don't like them. The skin on my birthmark side is also a little bumpy. Now, mind you, it's not grotesque, but I still don't like it. The redness I would live with, but the bumps, I would rather not.

Am I vain? Maybe. But I have a choice. I can do something about it and I will... as soon as I get the courage to. I want so much to undergo the pulse-dye laser therapy, but, what can I say? I'm afraid. I have listened to men who have been through the procedure, say how much it hurts, during and after. Ouch! But then again, I am told that women can tolerate more pain than men, but I'm not out to prove a point. :)

I also know that if I do have this laser treatment, it will turn my birthmark area a very dark, chocolate brown then the bruising will start! Yikes! I may never leave the house!

However, all this is temporary. The bruising does go away and the birthmark lightens and the blood vessels that cause the bumps, shrink and become less noticeable. This, after several treatments! Yes. I have to go more than once in order for it to be successful.

Well, I will eventually get up the nerve to do it. Until then, wish me luck, courage, heart, strength and conviction to do this. I know it will be hard but worth it.

Here's a poem, written by me, about this subject, so near and dear to me:

My face

My one half is joyous and clear and light,
My other is dark and likes the night.
Hide under a veil or face the sun,
Strangers ask me "what have you done?"
It's red, it's dark, it's bright, it's there,
I wish I could hide it with my hair.
You think it's a scar, a bruise, a burn.
Why won't people ever learn?
They stare, they point, they laugh, they heckle.
Can't they see, it's only a freckle.
A spot that's known by many names.
Like "birthmark" or even "port-wine-stain".
Don't say "omygosh" or "Ew, what's that?"
It makes me feel as small as a gnat.
So please be polite when you ask me why
I have this redness around my eye.
I'll explain it, straight out, that'll be the end
Then we can move on and become friends.

© Jozi, September 09, 1997


Birthmarks and Port Wine Stains
Great site and discussion group. Find out about new pulse-dye laser technology.



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Last updated September 9th, 1997