Autobiography of a black "Labweiler"


Yes, I have polka dots on my tongue!

Hello! My name is KC, and I am a big, black Lab from Atlanta.
Let me tell you a little about myself:

My mother was an FBI agent who specialized in bomb searches and alien abductions. My father was an orthopedic surgeon. I was born with 2 sisters and 3 brothers on the set of the X-files movie where Mom was working as a consultant. After 6 weeks of family life, I packed up and headed to the coast of Maine where I worked on a lobster boat. This is where I learned to make lobster bisque and other seafood delights. After saving enough money, I headed to New York City where I worked in the kitchens of Chef Boyardee.

Bitten by the travel bug once again, I caught the midnight train to Georgia. Upon arriving in Atlanta, I got work in the Purina factory as a quality control technician. I quit the factory after gaining 10 pounds in one week. Consequently, as I wandered looking for new work, the animal control people were able to catch me as I had packed on some weight. They took me to a dingy motel where I was given my own room, but was kept up all night by party animals. After 3 days at the Cobb County Humane Society, two people let me out of my room and let me run in a yard. I was so excited, I didn't stop running. Its a miracle that they decided to adopt me. But I left with them that day, January 10, 1998, and have been with my new Mom and Dad ever since.

At first it was difficult to adjust to being a "domestic pet." Mom and Dad trusted me to stay at home while they went to work at Georgia State University. Dad has many cd's and they taste sooooo good! I also tried to help by doing the dishes they left in the sink, but after breaking a couple, they wouldn't let me help anymore. But they do leave the TV on for me every day. I used to watch all the soaps and record summaries for a 900-number, but now they make me watch Animal Planet all day!

On weekends Mom and Dad take me to The Carter Center Park. The park is full of dogs that can run and play leashless. Dad and I like to hike up Kennesaw Mountain. We made it to the top, about 1 million miles high. Recently we went rafting down the river! I had never floated so close to the water before. There were some ducks swimming around, so I tried to get them, but when I jumped out of the boat, my head went under water! It was so scary! I tried to get back in the raft but I couldn't, so Dad had to jump in and help me swim to the edge of the river. Mom paddled the boat over to get us. Then, Mom and Dad and some other people went swimming in the water. That was so weird! I have never seen people swim before, so that was quite an experience. When we go places, we take Dad's truck that has a special area for me to ride in so that I can put my face in the wind. Mom's car doesn't have a dog-riding-area, so she reclines the front seat and I lay on my tummy, facing the back. Mom buckles me in so I don't slide.

We also go to Gramma's house to visit. Gramma has a yard where I run and tackle my uncle Andy. My aunt Marilyn lives there too, but she's too old to play. They are both Cocker Spaniels and are intimidated by my burly physique. We have visited my human aunt and uncle, Mandy and Bill, and my cousins Lady (miniature long-haired Labrador) and Midnite (long-haired Siamese). They have an old mill and a creek with lots of rocks and foamy water. Midnite doesn't like to play with me just like all the other cats in the neighborhood. I try to play chase and tackle, but they just hiss and scratch. I also don't understand small dogs! They just yap, yap, yap at nothing! They run up to me like they want to play and when I tackle them, they cry like babies.

My parents have been giving me acting lessons. I have learned how to act like I am sitting, begging,jumping, shaking paws, lying down,putting my head down, rolling over, crawling on my stomach,walking around Mom and Dad, bowing and playing dead.

I go to the Canine Academy and Playschool in Midtown. I had to go for an entrance interview. Mom was very nervous because I had to get in a crate and not get mad for a long time. I also had to play nice with two other doggies that already go to playschool. At playschool there is a big room where we run and tumble. Mom hopes that I don't bully anybody or I won't be allowed to go back. But, it is important for me to go to playschool to work off my extra fat! I weighed in at 109 pounds on my first day! Now I am a sleek 94 pounds!

This is what I look like after playschool

I LOVE PLAYSCHOOL!!! Dad drops me off at 7:30 a.m., much earlier than he usually gets up! I run right into the playroom and am greeted by the other doggies. We roughhouse until about 11, when they take us for a walk. Then we have nap time so that we don't get grouchy. After nap time, we have one-on-one snuggle time with a person. Then, we play some more until our parents come to get us. One time, Mom came early to meet my classmates. It was sooo embarrassing! I tried to hide from her while she was petting everyone. I have also started learning ettiquette at the playschool building. Mom and Dad are taking me there at night, but I have to stay on the leash and do things that Dad tells me.
After getting my CGC, I took up Agility! Mom and Dad built me an Agility Playground for Christmas. They made me a tire jump, a series of weave poles, and a collapsed tunnel, aka "the chute." They made all this stuff really cheap, so if you want to know how go here.
I was also bitten by a poisonous spider. We didn't see it, but they are pretty sure it was a spider. My tail (where it bit me) swelled up and it hurt soooooo bad! It was all infected and stuff. They had to put me to sleep and shave my tail and give me all sorts of medicine.

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lizh@bellsouth.net




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