Havamál (‘words of the high one’)
One strong element of paganism, which was particularly prevalent in Celtic and Norse societies, was the practice of ancestor worship. We read in the Icelandic poems how the god Rig came to Midgard (the earth) and fathered the three classes of mankind (thralls, freemen and royalty). Many royal families of Europe once traced their lineage back to individual gods and goddesses. For the less ambitious, such as an Icelandic fisherman called Thorolf of Most, he held a certain hill called Holyfell to be the burial place of his ancestors and no person was to look upon it unwashed and no living thing should be killed on it. Years later when Thorolf’s son, Thorstein, and his crew were drowned on a fishing trip, a local shepherd claimed to have seen the hill Holyfell standing open, and Thorstein and his crew (all related by blood or marriage) being welcomed inside by Thorolf himself, amid general rejoicing. This idea emphasises the significance of a persons links with their ancestors.
In Heimskringl, History of Hakon the good by Snorri Sturleson, Snorri describes a ritual held by Sigurd, Jarl of Lade. Libations were made to Odin for the king’s victory and power, Njord and Frey for good seasons and peace, they also drank bowls for their howe-laid kinsmen and that was called minni (loosely translated as memory).
Christmas, or Yule as it is also known, was primarily a time held sacred to the memory of departed family. Feasting and ritual were held in their honour and it was not as much a religious ceremony as a service of remembrance. Whether you believe them to be in the halls of Asgard or gathered right here in Midgard is unimportant, simply honour their memory, thank them for their gifts and traits passed on and ask for continued guidance and protection.
Perhaps if you wanted to exalt them still further you could set up a memorial to them. As Hávamál 72 says, "A son is a blessing, though born late, To a father no longer alive: Stones would seldom stand by the highway, If sons did not set them there". The stones refer of course to memorial stones. These stones would have runic inscriptions carved upon them, telling of a particular person or group of people. These stones were not necessarily set up near or on a grave but at public places to allow everybody to read about the "glory of the great dead". This may or may not be a practical modern solution, a stone set up in a garden or back yard may suffice or even indoors. Alternatively a pictorial commemoration could be crafted and hung in the home.
There have also been connections made between ancestors and Alfar (elves, spirits, faeries and other incarnations). There are accounts of Alfarblots taking place where mound buried ancestors could be called upon for their healing powers and in particular when calling for aid in childbirths. Could this be seen as aid being sought and given to the continuation of the family line? The "mound dwellers" were also sought out for their wisdom and counsel. It is recorded in several sources that persons wishing to gain knowledge or counsel, would sit on top of the mound overnight and the dead person would visit them in a dream and reveal the information.
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