School Poems 2

A Bad Case of the Sneezes

by Bruce Lansky (adapted)

Last night I had the sneezes.
I was really very ill.
My mother called the doctor
who prescribed a purple pill.

At eight o'clock I went to bed.
My mom turned out the light.
I used up one whole box of tissues
sneezing through the night.

I sneezed my brains out in my bed.
I didn't get much rest.
So that's the reason, teacher,
that I failed the spelling test.

Confession

by Bruce Lansky

I have a brief confession
that I would like to make.
If I don't get it off my chest
I'm sure my heart will break.

I didn't do my reading.
I watched TV instead-
while munching cookies, cakes, and chips
and cinnamon raisin bread.

I didn't wash the dishes.
I didn't clean the mess.
Now there are roaches eating crumbs-
a million, more or less.

I didn't turn the TV off.
I didn't shut the light.
Just think of all the energy
I wasted through the night.

I feel so very guilty.
I did a lousy job.
I hope my students don't find out
that I am such a slob.

Excuses, Excuses by Joyce Armor

I couldn't do my homework.
I had asthma and was wheezing.
I had nosebleeds, measles, heat rash,
with some very painful sneezing,
and itchy skin with blisters-
oh so blotchy red and hivy-
malaria and toothaches,
and a patch of poison ivy,
eight spider bites and hair loss,
and a broken leg with scabies,
Rocky Mountain spotted fever,
and a full-blown case of rabies.
I suffered-it was awful-
but I'm feeling better now.
Could I have done my homework?
No, I really don't see how.

My Dog Chewed Up My Homework

by Bruce Lansky

I'm glad to say my homework's done.
I finished it last night.
I've got it right here in this box.
It's not a pretty sight.

My dog chewed up my homework.
He slobbered on it, too.
So now my homework's ripped to shreds
and full of slimy goo.

It isn't much to look at,
but I brought it anyway.
I'm going to dump it on your desk
if I don't get an A.

Freddie by Phil Bolsta

I don't like doing homework.
I know that it will bore me.
But now I am much happier
'Cause Freddie does it for me!

He greets me at the door each day
When I come home from school.
He just can't wait to read my books-
I think that's pretty cool.

I give him all my homework,
Like history and math.
And when he's done I give him
A nice warm bubble bath!

My grades are so much better now,
Which makes my parents glad.
Freddie is the smartest dog
That I have ever had!