Life According to Burton
This is supposed to be a advice page, but last month it was observations.
Don't spell helpful and usual with two l's. Wait a minute, does spel have two l's?
If I have a serious part on this page, here it is.
If you ever get a homepage and run out of memory, just get another e-mail address. Sign up again with the new mail and they won't be the wiser!
How do I know this? Let's just say this guy I know does it and....
Secret Service operative update: Agents Resuit and Gunderson have been taken off of project "reattrition" and place on project "antideluvious." Both are relient on each other's success and "y" felt the same men should work on each.
The Star Wars Issue
My rating of the movies
- Star Wars: Return of the Jedi . My favorite, because of the finality. Palpatine is killed, Vader becomes Akakin again, the Empire crumbles, happy ending...note: the original title was "Revenge of the Jedi," but according to George Lucas, "Revenge is not a Jedi concept."
- Star Wars: The Empire Stikes Back. All of the super Star Wars freaks think this is the best, mainly because of the showcase of Vader as a super-villian and the appearance of Boba Fett. The battle of Endor is the best part according to me. Soundtrack is the best of the three.
- Star Wars: The original, just doesn't hold the appeal of the others. Has the highest "corn factor" of the three. (Ewoks are cool, not corny!)
Special Edition notes
I saw all three, and here are the important things
Star Wars
- You see the Outrider leaving Mos Eisley (who's the mercinary who smuggles all the spice, DASH!)
- Han, Leia, and Luke running around in the Death Star: much better with teched-up blaster fire
- X-wings leaving Yavin 4 and gearing up: great!
- Death Star really kicks with new graphics, whether blowing things up or getting blown up
The Empire Stikes Back
- That Super-class Star Destoyer Executor is REALLY big, isn't it?
- Hoth is cool
- Yoda is da bomb
- Boba really stands out in this one, editional scenes and remastering make a big difference
Return of the Jedi
- For some reason, Leia looks better as Jabba's slave. (sharper image or is it hormones?)
- The battle of Endor, on steroids!
- They got rid of the Ewok song at the end! HOW DARE THEY, IT WAS THE BEST PART OF THE MOVIE!!!!!! (my only complaint)
- You see Coruscant for the first time, it's pretty impressive, prequels can't waaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiittttt!!!!!
Prequels
Lastest talk: summer 99. Droids, Boba, Obi Wan, and Anakin. Young Senator Palpatine. Coruscant on the big screen.
Click here for a hilarious Letterman Top Ten List about the Special Edition!
Click here for my favorite line from the movies
Sexually perverted lines left out of most of the lists
(these come from Vader's chats with the emperor)
- "I have felt it." (they say this several times, why do we have to know this?)
- Emperor Palpatine: "His compassion for you shall be his undoing." (undoing of what, his shirt?)
- Emperor Palpatine: "He will come to you and then you will take him before me." (either Palpy wants to watch or will join in, can be taken either way)
Final Thoughts...
Final Thought: Let the Wookie win, dammit!!!After Thought: "I thank you on this occasion of your daughter's wedding, I hope the first child is a masculine child. -- Dirty Etzio, Robin Hood: Men in Tights