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| CONCERNING ORIGINS If there had been ANY indication of what would transpire that night, she probably would have stayed home. But, she didn't. And here I am, years later, trying to synthesize the inspiration into something legible for the growing thirst of all things Tolkien, serious or not. For dignity's sake, I'll simply call her Little Cat A. She and I became fast friends instantly in 7th grade, when interest in creatures called hobbits automatically labeled us the worst sort of geeks imaginable. The fact that neither one of us showed any remorse or smidgen of regret for this totally uncool fascination sealed our doom as hobbit freaks. IT TOOK A GEEK TO KNOW ONE Despite the sneers, jeers, and rolling eyes of our contemporaries, our friendship evolved around the merits of our favorite characters, culminating in late night debates on the weekend. Our parents learned quickly to get out of the way and not wonder at the strange references to Magic Disappearing Rings, Walking Trees, and Furry Feet. We think they might have excused us by reason of insanity, or a really bizarre homework assignment. Whatever their hopes and fears were, though, these debates later morphed into some rather egregious theatrical interpretations of our favorite scenes. Should I tell you that Little Cat A has some rather...er, sado-masochistic tendencies??? I only tell you these things for two reasons: these 'interpretations' were the forerunner for what spun quickly out of control into what you see now as a website comic. ...and because we employed the use of a tape-recorder and have lost track of the tapes and wish to head off any blackmailing orc out there who thinks he will cause scandal in revealing them. Personally, said orc would be of a rather desperate bent if he thinks he could get much mileage off those tapes. But you know what? It might actually be fun! On second thought, maybe *I'm* the one with masochistic tendencies. THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE MOVIE!!!!!!! This was how we entertained ourselves in our safe little hobbiteses-holeses, until... THE MOVIE!!!!!!! Ralph Bakshi's movie, that is, in 1978. George Lucas smashed the box office and all ideas about special effects with 'Star Wars;' but even with all of that, Tolkien's world was still too layered and rich for the likes of Industrial Light and Magic to tranform to the screen. Which makes Ralph Bakshi's courageous endeavor to animate the story, in all truth, a leap of faith as much as a fan's deepest desire fulfilled. The word 'rotoscoping' made the process sound as mysterious as wizard's fireworks, but we didn't care. At last, we would see Frodo and Gandalf and Gollum in action. And Bakshi's film fed our fire to the point of lampooning our favorite parts, not the least of which centered around a Foto-Novel of said movie, which produced rather unremarkable, but entertaining, fodder. Then came the evening in which this whole thing began. Little Cat A was up to mischief that night, I could tell. Three o'clock in the morning and the tape-recorder was spinning its little wheels, soaking up every theory we had about the role of women in the novels. Scrunching up her face with impish intent, Little Cat A scrutinized the pages of the Foto-Novel, until her eyes landed on a page not too far into the story. You've seen it all now. Even Jackson employed this visual: Bilbo standing on the Stump, declaiming his farewell, and grasping the Ring behind his back, ready to slip it on at the right moment. Unsuspecting, I asked her what was wrong. Thrusting the page into my face, she asked, "does that look like a WASHER to you?" MEDDLING IN THE AFFAIRS OF THE MASTER I couldn't deny it. The Ring in the foto-novel looked as flat and as thick as a washer that had been sprayed gold. And it was evident on other pages as well. Yet, beyond that little idiosyncrasy, I could see no other reason to remark upon it. I set it down, smirking over the animation effects. What a small imagination I had! Little Cat A bounced up, eyes lit up with new inspiration. "The REAL story of the Lord of the Rings!" she cried, launching into what can only be described now as ... improv. And I just sat there, watching, not sure if I should encourage her, or hide like Bilbo from the dwarves. |
| Dark Lordess : A History |
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| "It was the result of a sugar high and too much caffeine...wait, don't put that! That's how a lot of fan fiction starts!" - Sharon Appel |