One of the best places to start is to read together a basic book on effective couple communication. thais couples Interracial marriage couples. Keep short accounts - It's easy to find storage space when you are collecting hurts and frustrations. These are usually over small issues that were either unidentified or were identified but not dealt with. Over time they have a tendency to expand. thais couples Questions for couples. So, these need to be dealt with and "deflated" as soon as possible. Try to define the problem. How long has it been a problem? Is it really a problem? Develop a sense of perspective - Are the personal idiosyncrasies a "high-ticket" item or a "low ticket item? You know those little things that irritate. thais couples Las-vegas-marriage-laws. Write down those things that bother you about your spouse and sort out a more fine-tuned perspective. Acknowledge your own contribution to the problem - A realistic perspective is one that examines an issue from angles. In other words, "What is my part of the problem?" In Psalm 139:23-24 David writes, "Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me and know my anxious thoughts; and see if there be any hurtful way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way" (NASB). Now that is a good example of an intimate, and honest, relationship. Be clear about the source of your anger - Ask yourself, "Is this anger about my spouse or my children, or is it a response to a combination of things that has grown throughout the day?" It can be so painful and destructive to unload our anger on someone we love over unrelated issues. Practice constructive criticism - Before you even begin here, pray about understanding. If the issue is a legitimate "high-ticket" item, practice getting all the facts through clarifying questions. Questions can decrease the intensity of the moment, broaden a person's perspective, stimulate new ways of thinking, and help a person see the value of looking at as many options as possible. Rehearse your confrontation and carry it out constructively - Address your spouse by name, give them specific information about your concerns and limit them to one or two if possible.