Make It With ZZ Top

In the year 2000, I worked for a food and beer vendor that would follow around ZZ Top during an eastern and midwest portion of their tour that summer. We would make quite a killing, in fact. Drunk fat people buy plastic cups of Bud Light for ridiculous figures. In fact, I would often find myself bringing home up to $100 in tips, which is fucking fantastic. We would also sell Chicago style pizzas, corn dogs, and nachos with a spicy beef topping. That stuff didn't sell quite as well as the beer, but it was definitely something the fat fucks sprang for a majority of the time. So one night after ZZ Top finished its set in Akron, we were cleaning vomit and ketchup stains off the side of our portable kitchen, after all the drunken folks past their prime had left the venue, a bearded figure walked from backstage toward us. It was motherfucking Billy Gibbons.

"You guys still open for business?"

My boss said, "Well, I'm sure we can help you out. The fryer ain't warm but that's not a problem. Want a corn dog? Nachos?"

My boss didn't even wait for him to reply before he jumped up into the trailer.



"Yeah, I'll have a corn dog sport."

Billy winked at me as my boss turned around to make a corn dog. I didn't know what to make of it, but before I knew it, Billy was unbuckling my pants and pulled my 7" cock out and began to arouse it. He licked the tip with the butterfly flick and rubbed the head of my cock, which started to ooze pre-cum, all over his long blonde beard. It was painful against the beard whiskers, but a good pain. Billy put my cock into his mouth and began to suck. I've had plenty of women, but this hummer, this put them all to shame. The shorter hairs around his mouth would poke into the base of my shaft and tickle my balls. It was so incredible that I came before my boss had finished frying up the corn dog.

I zipped my pants up and Billy Gibbons put his sunglasses back up and smirked at me. He hadn't swallowed my load yet. My boss took his money, and Billy walked off after taking his first erotic bite of the corn dog, letting my ejaculate flow down his throat as he chewed the corn meal and hot dog.

I tried to get in contact with Billy Gibbons several times, but he would have none of it.

In 2002, he made several Quaker State motor oil commercials, and I would get an erection every time one came on the television.