A lot has changed in the last year with her and I. She was in another relationship and i pretty much had to back off and let that take whatever course it was meant to take.
Many months went by and I don't remember how or why but we just started talking again..strictly as friends..no flirting or anything. I guess enough time had gone by where i didn't feel funny about it. It was nice to have an intelligent, funny silly female friend again...someone who I had shared all my secrets with already. It was like we'd never stopped talking. Then not too long afterwards, the relationship she was in fell apart. And no, i had NOTHING to do with it. I know exactly what y'all are thinking :) Her and her man was a subject we mainly stayed away from. I wanted it to be clear that i wished her happiness no matter who she was with. And i did. I mean of course deep down i hoped we'd get a chance to see what could develop but honestly i did not expect it to really happen.
After they broke up, i was really careful about flirting with her...i mainly avoided it. I just wanted her to know that i was there for her as a friend if she needed to talk or vent and wasn't looking to take advantage of her newly single situation. I think she knows me well enough to know that i was sincere. Then things just started to develop naturally from that point and now i have plane tickets. *jumps up and down with glee* Also, NY Dude and i have patched up our friendship...which i'm very happy about too.
Ok so now the real test comes. Up to this point, i have only spent about a total of 1.5 hours in her presence. So eve tho we know each other, we don't "really" know each other, nahmean? Like what if she doesn't like the way i chew? Or what if she walks while dragging one foot behind her? Or what if she thinks my breath smells or talk too fast? Or what if she tells corny jokes then snorts when she laughs? Or what if we just simply don't get along in person? I'm going into unchartered territory here...can internet/phone affairs translate into real life relationships? not to mention she's on the west coast...good lord. Da hell am i doing? LOL
But really i'm cool. I'm sure it'll be just fine. Worse comes to worse, i'll have a lifelong friend. But i will say that i realized this morning that its been about 5 years since a woman really truly cared about me. Being loved by a woman is something i definitely miss..it just feels so completely natural. Its alot easier for me to make a woman happy and give her things that she needs because our needs are usually the same. I just do what i would like done to me. Most woman love to be complimented, to be noticed, given lots of attention and affection..to be listened to..etc. So its second nature for me to give that to someone cuz its everything that i want too.
Anyway, keep your fingers crossed for me y'all. Talk to you when i get back from Cali..