Introduction
When it
comes to Islamic duties, the Muslim woman is just like a man: she has a mission
in life, and so she is required to be as effective, active and social as her
particular circumstances and capabilities allow, mixing with other women as
much as she can and dealing with them in accordance with the worthy Islamic
attitudes and behaviour that distinguish her from other women.
Wherever
the Muslim woman is found, she becomes a beacon of guidance, and a positive
source of correction and education, through both her words and her deeds.
The
Muslim woman who has been truly guided by the Qur'an and Sunnah has a refined
social personality of the highest degree, which qualifies her to undertake her
duty of calling other women to Islam, opening their hearts and minds to the
guidance of this great religion which elevated the status of women at a
remarkably early stage in their history and furnished them with a vast range of
the best of characteristics which are outlined in the Qur'an and Sunnah. Islam
has made the acquisition of these characteristics a religious duty for which a
person will be rewarded, and will be called to account if he or she fails to
attain them. These texts succeeded in making the personality of the woman who
is sincere towards Allah (SWT) into a brilliant example of the decent, chaste,
polite, God-fearing, refined, sociable woman.
The
Muslim woman who understands the teachings of Islam stands out in every women's
gathering she attends, as she demonstrates the true values of her religion and
the practical application of those values by her attaining of those worthy
attributes. The make-up of her distinct social character represents a huge
store of those Islamic values, which can be seen in her social conduct and
dealings with people. From this rich, pure source, the Muslim woman draws her
own customs, habits and ways of dealing with others and she cleanses her soul
and forms her own Muslim, social personality from the same source.
She
has a good attitude towards others
and treats them well
The
Muslim woman is of good and noble character, friendly, humble, gentle of speech
and tactful. She likes others and is liked by them. By doing so, she is
following the example of the Prophet (PBUH) who, as his servant Anas (RAA)
reported, was "the best of people in his attitude towards others."
Anas
(RAA) saw more than anyone else of the Prophet's good attitude, and witnessed
such good attitudes that no-one could imagine it existed in any human being. He
told us of one aspect of that noble attitude of the Prophet (PBUH): "I
served the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) for ten years, and he never said to me `Uff!'
(The smallest word of contempt). If I did anything, he never said, `Why did you
do that?' And if I did not do something, he never said, `Why did you not do
such-and-such?”
The
Prophet (PBUH) was of the best character, as Allah (SWT) said: ( And you
[stand] on an exalted standard of character.) (Qur'an 68:4)
He
(PBUH) repeatedly told his Sahabah of the effect a good attitude would
have in forming an Islamic personality and in raising a person's status in the
sight of Allah (SWT) and of other people. He (PBUH) told them: "Among the
best of you are those who have the best attitude (towards others)."3
"The most beloved to me and the closest to me on the Day of Resurrection
will be those of you who have the best attitudes. And the most hateful to me
and the furthest from me on the Day of Resurrection will be the prattlers and
boasters and al-mutafayhiqun." The Sahabah said, "O
Messenger of Allah (PBUH), we understand who the prattlers and boasters are,
but who are al-mutafayhiqun?" He (PBUH) said, "The proud and
arrogant."
The
Sahabah (RAA) - men and women alike - used to hear the Prophet's noble
moral teachings, and they would see with their own eyes the excellent way in
which he used to deal with people. So they would obey his words and follow his
example. Thus was established their society which has never been equalled by
any other in the history of mankind.
Anas
(RAA) said: "The Prophet (PBUH) was merciful. Nobody came to him without
receiving a promise of his help, which he would fulfil if he had the means to
do so. On one occasion, the iqamah for prayer had been given, when a
Bedouin came to him, took hold of his cloak, and said, `I still have some
matter outstanding, and I do not want to forget it.' So the Prophet (PBUH) went
with him and resolved the matter, then he came back and prayed."
The
Prophet (PBUH) did not see anything wrong with listening to the Bedouin and
resolving his issue, even though the iqamah had already been given. He
did not get upset with the man for pulling on his cloak, or object to resolving
the matter before the prayer, because he was building a just society, teaching
the Muslims by his example how a Muslim should treat his brother, and showing
them the moral principles that should prevail in a Muslim community.
If good
attitudes and manners among non-Muslims are the result of a good upbringing and
solid education, then among Muslims such good attitudes come, above all, from
the guidance of Islam, which makes good attitudes a basic characteristic of the
Muslim, one which will raise his status in this world and will weigh heavily in
his favour in the Hereafter. No deed will count for more on the Day of
Judgement than a man's good attitude, as the Prophet (PBUH) said: "Nothing
will weigh more heavily in the balance of the believing servant on the Day of
Resurrection than a good attitude (towards others). Verily Allah (SWT) hates
those who utter vile words and obscene speech."
Islam
has made this good attitude towards others an essential part of faith, and those
who have the best attitude towards others are the most complete in faith, as
the Prophet (PBUH) said: "The most perfect in faith of the believers are
those who are best in their attitude towards others."
Islam
also describes those who have the best attitude towards others as being the
most beloved to Allah (SWT) of His servants. This is seen in the hadith of
Usamah ibn Shurayk, who said: "We were sitting with the Prophet (PBUH) as
if there were birds on our heads: none of us were talking. Some people came to
him and asked, `Who is the most beloved to Allah (SWT) of His Servants?' He
said, `Those who are the best in attitude towards others.'"
It
comes as no surprise that the person who has the best attitude towards others
should also be the one who is most beloved to Allah (SWT), for good treatment
of others is an important feature of Islamic law. It is the most significant
deed that can be placed in the balance of the Muslim on the Day of Judgement,
as we have seen. It is equivalent to prayer and fasting, the two greatest bases
of Islam, as the Prophet (PBUH) said: "No greater deed will be placed in
the balance than a good attitude towards others. A good attitude towards others
will bring a person up to the level of fasting and prayer." According to
another report, he (PBUH) said: "By virtue of his good attitude towards
others, a person may reach the level of one who habitually fasts (during the
day) and stands in prayer (at night)."
So
the Prophet (PBUH) repeatedly emphasized the importance of a good attitude and
encouraged his Companions to adopt it, using various methods to instil it in
their hearts by his words and deeds. He understood the great impact this good
attitude would have in purifying their souls and enhancing their morals and
manners. For example, he told Abu Dharr: "O Abu Dharr, shall I not tell
you of two qualities which are easy to attain but which will weigh more heavily
in the balance?" He said, "Of course, O Messenger of Allah." He
said, "You should have a good attitude towards others and remain silent
for lengthy periods. By the One in Whose hand is my soul, nothing that people
have ever attained is better than these two."
And
he (PBUH) said: "A good attitude is a blessing and a bad attitude is a
calamity. Piety (birr) lengthens life, and charity will prevent a bad
death."
One
of his du`a's was: "Allahumma ahsanta khalqi fa ahsin k (O
Allah (SWT), You have made my physical constitution good, so make my attitude
and behaviour good also)."
The
prayer of the Prophet (PBUH), asking Allah (SWT) to make his attitude good when
Allah (SWT) had described him in the Qur'an as being ( on an exalted
standard of character) (Qur'an 68:4), is a clear indication of his deep
concern and earnest desire that the Muslims should continue to seek to increase
in good attitudes, no matter what heights they had already scaled, just as
their Prophet (PBUH) continued to seek to increase in good attitudes through
this du`a'. "Good attitudes" is a comprehensive term which
includes all the good characteristics that human beings may acquire, such as
modesty, patience, gentleness, forgiveness, tolerance, cheerfulness,
truthfulness, trustworthiness, sincerity, straightforwardness, purity of heart,
and so on.
The one
who sets out to explore the Islamic teachings on social issues will find
himself confronted with a host of teachings that encourage every single one of
these noble attitudes. This is an indication of the intense concern that Islam
has to form the social personality of the Muslim in the most precise fashion.
So it does not stop at mentioning generalities, but it also deals with every
minor moral issue that may form individual aspects of the integrated social
personality. This comprehensiveness does not exist in other social systems as it
does in Islam.
The
researcher who sets out to explore the character of the Muslim woman has no
alternative but to examine all these texts, and to understand the guidance and
legislation contained therein. Only then will he be able to fully comprehend
the noble social personality that is unique to the true Muslim, man or woman.
She
is truthful
The
Muslim woman is truthful with all people, because she has absorbed the
teachings of Islam which encourages truthfulness and regards it as the chief of
virtues, whilst lying is forbidden and regarded as the source of all evils and
bad deeds. The Muslim woman believes that truthfulness naturally leads to
goodness, which will admit the one who practices it to Paradise, while
falsehood leads to iniquity which will send the one who practices it to Hell.
The Prophet (PBUH) said: "Truthfulness leads to piety (birr), and
piety leads to Paradise. A man continues to speak the truth until he is
recorded in the sight of Allah (SWT) as a sincere lover of truth (siddiq).
Falsehood leads to iniquity and iniquity leads to Hell. A man will continue to
speak falsehood until he is recorded in the sight of Allah (SWT) as a
liar."
Therefore the
Muslim woman is keen to be a sincere lover of truth (siddiqah), striving
to be true in all her words and deeds. This is a sublime status which is
achieved only by God-fearing Muslim women by means of truthfulness, purity of
heart and by virtue of which she is recorded in the sight of Allah (SWT) as an
honoured lover of truth.
She avoids giving false statements
The
true Muslim woman whose personality has been moulded by the teachings and
guidance of Islam does not give false statements, because to do so is haram: ( .
. . And shun the word that is false.) (Qur'an 22:30) Bearing false witness,
besides being haram, does not befit the Muslim woman. It damages her
honour and credibility, and marks a person as twisted and worthless in the
sight of others. So the Qur'an completely forbids this attitude for the chosen
servants of Allah (SWT), men and women alike, just as it forbids other major
sins: ( Those who witness no falsehood and, if they pass by futility, they
pass it by with honourable [avoidance].) (Qur'an 25:72)
Nothing
is more indicative of the enormity of this sin than the fact that the Prophet
(PBUH) mentioned it as coming after the two most serious sins on the scale of
major sins: associating partners with Allah (SWT), and disobedience to parents.
Then he repeated it to the Muslims, warning them with the utmost fervour. He
(PBUH) said: "Shall I not tell you of the most serious of the major
sins?" We said: "Of course, O Messenger of Allah." He said:
"Associating anything with Allah (SWT), and diobeying parents." He
was reclining, but then he sat up and said: "And bearing false
witness," and he kept repeating this until we wished that he would stop
(i.e., so that he would not exhaust himself with his fervour)."
She gives sincere advice
The
true Muslim woman does not only strive to free herself of negative characteristics;
she also seeks to offer sincere advice to every woman she comes into contact
with who has deviated from the guidance of Allah (SWT) - and how many women
there are who have wronged themselves and are in great need of someone to offer
them sincere advice and guide them back towards the straight path which Allah
(SWT) has commanded all of us to follow.
For the
true Muslim woman, offering sincere advice is not just the matter of
volunteering to do good out of generosity; it is a duty enjoined by Islam, as
the Prophet (PBUH) said: "Religion is sincerity [or sincere advice]."
The Sahabah asked, "To whom?" He said, "To Allah (SWT),
to His Book, to His Messenger, to the leaders of the Muslims and to their
common folk."
When
the Sahabah swore allegiance (bay`ah) to the Prophet (PBUH), they
would pledge to observe salah and zakah, and to be sincere
towards every Muslim, as is shown in the statement of Jarir ibn `Abdullah
(RAA): "I swore allegiance to the Prophet (PBUH) with the pledge that I
would establish regular prayer, pay zakah and be sincere to every
Muslim."
How
brilliantly the Prophet (PBUH) expressed the meaning of nasihah when he
said, "Religion is sincerity [or sincere advice]"! He summed up the
entire religion in just one word, "nasihah," indicating to
every Muslim the value of sincerity and sincere advice, and the great impact
that sincere advice has on the lives of individuals, families and societies.
When sincerity spreads among a people, they are guided to the straight path; if
sincerity is withheld, they will go far astray.
Therefore
nasihah was one of the most important matters that Muslims pledged to
observe when they swore allegiance to the Prophet (PBUH): it comes after salah
and zakah, as we have seen in the hadith of Jabir ibn Abdullah
quoted above.
The
fact that sincere advice is mentioned in conjunction with salah and zakah
in the oath of allegiance given by the great Sahabi Jarir ibn `Abdullah
to the Prophet (PBUH) is an indication of its importance in the Islamic scheme
of things and in deciding a person's fate in the Hereafter. It is therefore a
basic characteristic of the true Muslim who is concerned about his destiny on
the Day of Judgement.
In
Islam, responsibility is a general duty that applies to men and women alike,
each person has responsibilities within his or her own social sphere, as the
Prophet (PBUH) explained: "Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is
responsible for his flock. The leader is a shepherd and is responsible for his
flock; a man is the shepherd of his family and is responsible for his flock; a
woman is the shepherd in the house of her husband and is responsible for her
flock; a servant is the shepherd of his master's wealth and is responsible for
it. Each of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock."
If
we understand this, we will realize that the woman's responsibility includes
offering sincere advice to everyone around her who can benefit from it.
She
guides others to righteous deeds
The
Muslim woman whose soul has been purified by Islam and cleansed of the stains
of selfishness and love of show guides others to righteous deeds when she knows
of them, so that goodness will come to light and people will benefit from it.
It is all the same to her whether the good deed is done by herself or by
others, because she knows that the one who guides others to do righteous deeds
will be rewarded like the one who does the actual deed, as the Prophet (PBUH)
said: "Whoever guides others to do good will have a reward like that of
the person who does the good deed."
The
Muwoman is the least likely to keep goodness to herself, or to boast to others
about doing good, which is the attitude of selwomen who love to show off. It is
enough for the Muslim woman who guides others to do good to know that she will
be rewarded by Allah (SWT) in either case, and for the true Muslim woman,
storing up reward with Allah (SWT) is more important than fame and a good
reputation. In this way, goodness spreads throughout the community, and every
person will have the opportunity to do whatever Allah (SWT) helps him or her to
do.
How
many of these deadly psychological disorders are preventing good from being
spread in society! For the people who are suffering from them hope that they
alone will undertake good deeds to the exclusion of others, but circumstances
prevent them from doing so. So goodness and benefits remain locked up waiting
for the opportunity that never comes. The true Muslim, man or woman, who seeks
to please Allah (SWT) and earn reward from Him is free from such disorders. The
true Muslim guides people to do good deeds as soon as he or she is aware of an
opportunity, and thus he or she earns a reward from Allah (SWT) equal to the
reward of the one who does the good deed itself.
She
does not cheat, deceive, or stab in the back
The
sincere Muslim woman for whom truthfulness has become a deeply-rooted
characteristic does not cheat, deceive or stab in the back, because these
worthless characteristics are beneath her. They contradict the values of truthfulness,
and do not befit the Muslim woman. Truthfulness requires an attitude of
sincerity, straightforwardness, loyalty and fairness, which leaves no room for
cheating, lying, trickery, deceit or betrayal.
The
Muslim woman who is filled with the guidance of Islam is truthful by nature,
and has a complete aversion to cheating, deceiving and back-stabbing, which she
sees as a sign of a person's being beyond the pale of Islam, as the Prophet
(PBUH) stated in the hadith narrated by Muslim: "Whoever bears arms
against us is not one of us, and whoever cheats us is not one of us."
According
to another report, also narrated by Muslim, the Prophet (PBUH) passed by a pile
of food (in the market), put his hand in it and felt dampness (although the
surface of the pile was dry). He said, "O owner of the food, what is
this?" The man said, "it was damaged by rain, O Messenger of
Allah." He said, "And you did not put the rain-damaged food on top so
that people could see it! Whoever cheats us is not one of us."
Muslim
society is based on purity of human feeling, sincerity towards every Muslim,
and fulfilment of promises to every member of the society. If any cheats or
traitors are found in that society, they are most certainly alien elements
whose character is in direct contrast to the noble character of true Muslims.
Islam
views cheating, deception and back-stabbing as heinous crimes which will be a
source of shame to the guilty party both in this world and the next. The
Prophet (PBUH) announced that on the Day of Resurrection, every traitor would
be raised carrying the flag of his betrayal and a caller will cry out in the
vast arena of judgement, pointing to him and drawing attention to him: "Every
traitor will have a banner on the Day of Resurrection, and it will be said:
`This is the betrayer of so-and-so.'"
How
great will be the shame of those traitors, men and women, who thought that
their betrayal was long since forgotten, and now here it is, spread out for all
to see and carried aloft on banners held by their own hands.
Their
shame on the Day of Judgement will increase when they see the Prophet (PBUH),
who is the hope of intercession on that great and terrible Day, standing in
opposition to them, because they have committed the heinous crime of betrayal,
which is a crime of such enormity that it will deprive them of the mercy of
Allah (SWT) and the intercession of the Prophet (PBUH): "Allah (SWT), may
He be exalted, said: `There are three whom I will oppose on the Day of
Resurrection: a man who gave his word, and then betrayed; a man who sold a free
man into slavery and kept the money; and a man who hired someone, benefitted
from his labour, then did not pay his wages."
The
Muslim woman who has been truly guided by Islam steers clear of all forms of
deceit and back-stabbing. They exist in many forms in the world of modern
women, but the Muslim woman values herself too highly to include herself among
those cheating, deceiving women whom the Prophet (PBUH) considered to be
hypocrites: "There are four features, whoever has all of them is a true
hypocrite, and whoever has one of them has one of the qualities of a hypocrite
until he gives it up: when he is trusted, he is unfaithful; when he speaks, he
tells lies; when he make a promise, he proves treacherous; and when he
disputes, he resorts to slander."
She
keeps her promises
One of
the noble attitudes of the true Muslim woman is that she keeps her promises.
This attitude is the companion of truthfulness and indeed stems naturally from
it.
Keeping
promises is a praiseworthy attitude, one that indicates the high level of
civility attained by the woman who exhibits it. It helps her to succeed in
life, and earns her the love, respect and appreciation of others.
The
effects of this attitude in instilling moral and psychological virtues in girls
and boys are not unknown; if they see their mothers always keeping their
promises, this is the best example that they can be given.
For the
Muslim woman, keeping promises is not just the matter of social niceties, something
to boast about among her friends and peers; it is one of the basic Islamic
characteristics and one of the clearest indicators of sound faith and true
Islam. Many texts of the Qur'an and Sunnah emphasize the importance of this
quality: ( O you who believe! Fulfil all obligations.) (Qur'an 5:1) ( And
fulfil every engagement, for [every] engagement will be enquired into [on the
Day of Reckoning].) (Qur'an 17:34)
This
is a definitive command from Allah (SWT) to His believing servants, men and
women alike, to keep their promises and to fulfil whatever obligations those
promises entail. There is no room for escaping or dodging this responsibility.
It does not befit the Muslim who has committed himself or herself to then try
to get out of keeping the promise. It is his duty to keep his word. In some ayat,
the word for "promise" is connected by the grammatical structure of idafah
(genitive) to Allah (SWT) Himself, as an indication of its dignity and
sanctity, and of the obligation to keep promises: ( Fulfil the Covenant of
Allah, when you have entered into it . . .) (Qur'an 16:91)
Islam
dislikes those prattlers who carelessly make promises without following through
and keeping their word: ( O you who believe! Why say you that which you do
not? Grievously odious is it in the sight of Allah that you say that which you
do not.) (Qur'an 61:2-3)
Allah
(SWT) does not like His believing servants, male or female, to sink to the
level of empty words, promises given with no intention of fulfilment, and all
manner of excuses to avoid upholding the commitments made. Such conduct does
not befit believing men and women. The tone of the question asked in this ayah
is an expression of the extreme disapproval incurred by those believers who
commit the sin of saying that which they do not do.
The
Prophet (PBUH) said: "The signs of a hypocrite are three: when he speaks,
he lies; when he makes a promise, he breaks it; and when he is entrusted with
something, he betrays that trust."
According
to a report given by Muslim, he (PBUH) added: "Even if he fasts, prays and
thinks that he is a Muslim."
The
level of a woman's Islam is not determined only by acts of worship and rituals,
but also the extent to which her character is influenced by the teachings and
high values of Islam. She does only that which will please Allah (SWT). The
Muslim woman who understands and adheres to the teachings of Islam does not
break her promises, or cheat others, or betray them, because such acts
contradict the morals and values of true Isla, and such attitudes are only
found among men and women who are hypocrites.
Let
them know this, those women who tell lies to their own children, who make
promises then go back on thword, thus planting the seeds of dishonesty and
promise-breaking in their children's hearts. Let them know this, those women
who make empty, meaningless promises and attach no importance to the word of
honour to which they have committed themselves, lest by such carelessness they
become hypocrites themselves and earn the punishment of the hypocrites which,
as is well known, is a place in the lowest level of Hell.
She
is not a hypocrite
The
true Muslim woman is frank and open in her words and opinions, and is the
furthest removed from hypocrisy, flattery and false praise, because she knows
from the teachings of Islam that hypocrisy is haram, and does not befit
the true Muslim.