"ONLY THE STRONG SHALL ENTER THE GATES OF HEAVEN!"
What does Jesus Christ have to do with martial arts? No, really. Does anyone know? If you look at the picture at the immediate left, you'll see an image of figurines sold at www.catholicshopper.com that depict Jesus apparently training students in judo. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think there's any Biblical passage that illustrates that Jesus was a 9th level Dan in any particular budo. In fact, I think the whole "turn the other cheek" philosophy is quite the opposite of using a Rising-Dragon-Punch to knock your opponent to the ground, isn't it?
Well, maybe if the opponent is a heathen...
Worse still, is the figurine of "Gymnastics Jesus". In lieu of the recent sex scandal in the Catholic Church, is there really a need to depict Jesus surrounded by prepubescent girls in leotards? I mean, look at him. There's something really creepy about that statue. Look at how his mouth is left agape in an apparent mixture of lust and excitement. That is very disturbing! It's like they originally titled this piece "Sexual Predator Jesus", and someone said "Oh no...we should call this 'Gymnastics Jesus' if we want it to sell." I would swear that these statues were a joke if they weren't coming from a website that is maintained by very devout Catholics. I'm going to let this issue go now. I'm really bothered by that second statue.
"Jesus loves the little children..."
TUESDAY, JUNE 4, 2002
"LEAVE THAT MUPPET ALONE!"
So, the Queen of England celebrated the 50th year of her reign last night, and quite a few celebrities turned out. Among those numerous stars were the odd couple of Ozzy Osbourne and Kermit the Frog. Apparently, when Ozzy was just about to meet Queen Elizabeth the Second last night, Kermit upstaged the "Fucking Prince of Darkness" by leaping over his shoulder to shake the queen's hand [see pic. 1, left]. Ozzy, not very pleased with this, retaliated by strangling the green muppet [see pic. 2, lower left].
Can't we all just get along?
