In our neighborhood, we regularly see Tanya, Anna, Melissa, Lorna and others working the streets. It's painfully obvious they're not happily engaged in some humanitarian service to sexually deprived men. They're not making some abstract point about freedom of sexual expression.
Childhood sexual abuse, poverty, and drug addiction have stripped much of the dignity, joy and hope most of us guard for our children. As tough as prostitutes act, a long line of willful molesters, dealers and johns have victimized most of them.. Stone cold eyes betray the plastic smiles flashed at potential customers. Silver from completed transactions is quickly deposited in pockets of greedy dealers or gang "protectors.''
This is no way to live. And it's certainly a horrible way to die!
But the sad fact is that even victims can victimize others. Prostitutes proposition and harrass people walking or driving through our neighbourhood. They hurt the struggling small businesses in the area. They share disease and sickness with sexually incontinent men, who bring it home to unsuspecting families.
They encourage the prowling and trolling cars which proposition other women and children just walking down the street or standing at a bus stop.
They recruit new customers for drug dealers and introduce new girls to the streets.
Make no mistake, these victims are victimizing others.
As I talked with Tanya, I realized my anger or pity won't change her life.
There's more important things to do than argue if she is more a “victim” or “victimizer.” In fact, she is both. She is a person, just like the rest of us, a mixture of good and bad, problems and potential.
Not every victim of childhood sexual abuse propositions strangers or gets hooked on crack.
Not every poor person becomes a thief or joins a gang.
An explanation is not an excuse.
I can't change Tanya. Only she can make the move that leads to change. Thousands of people in Alcoholics Anonymous (and Narcotics Anonymous) are proof that everyone is able to make some positive choices.
I feel bad for the horrible things Tanya must have seen and experienced in the course of her short life. But I also live in a place where I can't allow her victimization of others to go unchecked.
Respect for her victims leads us to do what we can to make her “job” harder.
We’ll take and post pictures of her and her “johns.” We’ll patrol. We’ll go to the cops for more enforcement. We’ll post the license plates of johns on the web. We’ll follow her up and down streets to discourage business.
Respect for her makes us work to ensure help will be there when she's ready to stop. Services must be extremely practical. We must do what we can to ensure that drug, family and employment programs are organized for speedy access and integrated response - if she chooses to change.
To treat Tanya as “just a victim,” or as “just a criminal” is equally ineffective and disrespectful. In our neighbourhood we can’t choose between support and accountability. Revitalization requires both.
How’s that for a proposition?
Rev. Harry Lehotsky
514 Maryland Street
Winnipeg, Mb R3G 1M5
(204) 775-4929
lehotsky@escape.ca