We met Jim several months ago while checking out the possible purchase of a West End apartment block. He was introduced to us as the care-taker. His suite was clean. Gentle and soft-spoken, Jim was proud to show off the building.
Several years earlier we embarked on a process of obtaining and renovating affordable – and strictly managed rental properties. A combination of government funding and private donations allows us to do this hard but worthwhile work. Our goal was to provide an atmosphere which supports the desire of most people to live a quiet and productive life.
Jim listened intently to our plans for renovations. We discussed the new house rules about drinking, drugs and noise.
I told him that several suites in the building would be used for people who were working real hard to improve their lives. Some may have done time in prison and some may have graduated from treatment programs. Some come from abusive relationships. These are folks who would use – not abuse – a second chance. We would provide some supports, but would rely on the feedback of long term tenants to insure that the building stayed quiet and everyone behaved well.
Jim lit up when we talked about the “second chance.” He confided that his life wasn’t always smooth and he had moved to Winnipeg to start over. He was excited at the notion of helping us. He offered his care-taking experience and renovation skills to help us along.
We told detectives what we knew about Jim. They said they would try to contact his family. They left, not able to tell us what had happened. We felt numb from what little we knew.
Reporters were doing some investigative work of their own. The radio blared that a 35 year old man was dead following a stabbing on Sherbrook Street. They gave a detailed description of the suspect.
When reporters realized that Jim lived in a building owned by New Life Ministries, they called to get our reactions. I rehashed some of the same information I had shared with detectives.
It was a busy day. Still numbed by the news, I attended several community events that day. On the way home, I stopped by the place where Jim was stabbed. Yellow police tape has a sobering effect, but the pool of blood in the snow brought me out of the numbness to a sadness and anger too deep for words.
My stomach tightened. My mind bounced between extremes of rage and grief. For a second I even pitied a person so stupid to take a life for pocket change. But honestly, I felt more anger than pity. Mostly I prayed that police would quickly catch the murderer. I prayed that the courts would not mock Jim’s life with a lenient sentence. In the end, however, I know if we depend on the court to assign a value to Jim’s life, we’ll all be sorely disappointed – no matter what the sentence.
Several minutes later, another reporter called. We met in front of the church to discuss what happened to Jim. The numbness had worn off. The recitation of facts disintegrated.
The reporter asked “How do you feel about what happened?” A jumble of words dissolved into a stream of tears. I was tired. So many people are working so hard to improve things in our neighbourhood. But all that was left of Jim and all his dreams was a little pool of blood on the sidewalk.
In the end, my feelings won’t change a thing. And quitting is not an option I can live with.
It’s up to us to insure that Jim’s dreams for himself and this neighbourhood don’t fade away.
I’ll continue doing what Jim wanted to do – help fix up things in the neighbourhood, better his own life and help those around him.
I talked with his mom yesterday. In the midst of mourning the murder of her son, she affirmed our determination to make things better. We join Jim’s family in mourning the loss of his life, but we share their determination that his dreams live on.
Rev. Harry Lehotsky
514 Maryland Street
Winnipeg, Mb R3G 1M5
(204) 775-4929
lehotsky@escape.ca