I was about 500 miles from home, attending a conference. In the interests of saving money, I talked to an acquaintance who arranged for a friend to let me stay at his house while he was on vacation.
When I got into town and was given the keys, my acquaintance told me how to find the guy’s house. She also informed me that he had several large dogs. Sensing my concern, she commented, “But don’t worry. They’ll be outside while you’re there. Someone else is checking on the house. You just need the place for two nights, so it shouldn’t be a problem.”
I found the house, nestled in a new Sioux Falls subdivision. It was a big jump from the inner city of Winnipeg. My two word impression was: huge & quiet.
Huge houses sat on huge lots, with huge driveways and huge lawns. From the street, I noticed that the attached double garages looked almost as wide as the houses, protruding further than the front doors, making the residence seem ancillary to the parking garage.
The yard was huge. It reminded me that my aunt recently sent a letter after seeing a picture of our small inner-city lot. I guess she felt bad for us. “Don’t worry. One day you’ll probably have a house with a large yard too.” She had no way of knowing our joy as we paved over the last patch of grass in our yard. No mo’ lawn. Only paving stones, asphalt, shrubs and flowers. No more stress over who, how and when to mow. We enjoy our ‘postage stamp’.
I remember one suburban friend who suggested that I shouldn’t be fooled by appearances. “We both have to work long hours to pay a bloated mortgage. We both need cars because our lives are so spread out with work, kids’ schools, leisure and friends. We lose family time in the commute, and we lose personal time and money in yard work. Property taxes are killing us and we’re not even home enough to fully enjoy it.”
It’s not always rosy in suburbia. With all the bills, many families live one paycheque from bankruptcy. With all the time maintaining the yard and lifestyle, families are one fight from divorce. We’ve got grief in our neighbourhood, but tears flow freely in “nicer” areas as well.
Anyway, on the first night, the quiet of that suburban subdivision was shattered by the noise of barking dogs. The guy’s three dogs apparently resented being outside while some stranger roamed through their house. They watched through the patio doors and barked all night long. I was tired and glad the dogs were outside. Besides, all the dogs barking made me feel like I was home in the West End. I slept well the first night.
But on the second and final night, things were different. It was around midnight and I was tired, counting on five hours sleep before driving home. I opened the front door and stepped into the dark house. As I shut the door behind me, I heard a deep growl and saw the outline of a large, snarling dog. Two feet away! In the house!!
I carefully reached for the light switch. I remember thinking it’s amazing how many thoughts you can have in 10 seconds. I noticed the other two dogs were still outside. Someone watching the house must have let one of them in.
I froze in my tracks, wondering if my shredded carcass would leave a major mess on the nice carpet.
I glanced toward the bedroom and wondered if I could make it inside before being attacked.
I looked for a weapon with which to defend myself. But it occurred to me that harming the dog would not be the best way to repay the owner’s hospitality.
I took half a step toward the barking, snarling dog, trying to explain that I was only a visiting preacher and not a burglar. The logic of reasoning with a raging beast mocked me, but I didn’t know what else to do. The dog took half a step back.
I seized the moment and made it to the bedroom, relieved to be in possession of all my limbs. The relief was short-lived, however, when I noticed the door had those fancy lever handles – easily opened by large dogs. I barricaded the door and finally fell sleep.
The next morning, my suburban nightmare over, I retreated gladly to the relative safety of inner-city Winnipeg.
Rev. Harry Lehotsky
514 Maryland Street
Winnipeg, Mb R3G 1M5
(204) 775-4929
lehotsky@escape.ca