But in some homes, there are many other less joyful thoughts associated with stereotypical Christmas festivities.
It's a season for Christmas parties galore. But that's tough for those who are never invited anywhere by anyone. A lack of friends or friendliness throughout the year can amplify the silence of holiday loneliness.
It's a season for generosity and giving. Which is great -- except when you can't afford to give what others want.
It's tough looking at all the ads and flyers for stuff you can't afford. It's rough getting the hint that if you can't get your kids a brand new XBox you've somehow failed them as a parent. Some borrow from pay-day loan shops and can't feed their kids in January because they've bought them gifts in December. All to prove their parental competence and love.
It's a season for a growing number of ads and billboards encouraging RRSPs and investments. Which is great -- except when you know they're not talking to you.
For many, this is an annual reminder that they're not like all the other folk. I don't think they want people to feel guilty for trying to plan for retirement, they just can't imagine such luxury for themselves.
It's a season for family togetherness. Which is great -- except when your family's not together.
There are immigrants and refugees with family in some distant land waiting to be reunited. There are children who have lost parents and parents who have lost children. There are those who have lost their life partner and are spending their first Christmas alone.
There are families who know that the whole family is present at their Christmas meal except one lost sheep, the one that's stuck in some abyss of addiction. One empty seat can cause a disproportionate amount of pain and an undeserved burden of guilt for the rest of the family gathered to celebrate Christmas.
It's a season for peace, joy, and goodwill to all. But there are some for whom the lustre of the season is dulled by abuse, loneliness and depression. Some are caught in the powerful grip of a personal vice. Others have fallen victim to painful conflagrations of circumstance.
Why do I mention these folk?
I'm not talking about them to incite the guilt or pity of those who celebrate. I don't want anyone to mute their appreciation of what they have because there are others who don't have the same things.
I guess I'm writing because these are people I know. And I want them to know that in the midst of their pain, in the midst of a tough month - they're remembered by some who care.
It's an unfortunate reality that December days get dark long before dusk for many good folk in my neighbourhood.
But I want to tell you something else about these friends of mine.
Despite the length and depth of their personal darkness, they've done more to instruct me on determination and resilience than all those for whom hope comes cheap.
I've visited with a woman who informed her kids there won't be as many gifts under the tree this year. In this case that's a good thing, because she won't be doing what she used to do to earn money for all the extra gifts. I'm praying for God's blessing on her resolve.
One of my friends who's an ex-con will share a meal and a game of cards with another friend who lost loved ones in a December years ago. I can't be there, but I'm praying for God's blessing on this Christmas intersection of grace and mercy.
I recently drove a friend to the hospital following an attempt to take his own life. A weight of guilt, the burden of memories, and a fear of the future brought him to the brink of despair. A few friends and caring workers brought him back.
Another friend recently fought through his time of darkness to find a new job and a fresh opportunity to restore relationship and respect with his wife.
An immigrant family moved into a new apartment. Friends came to help move them in and even helped furnish the place.
A single mom was able to tell welfare she didn't need their help anymore. She's started a new job. She's had a tough year, but she's a great mom to great kids.
One guy phoned to donate a Christmas tree complete with decorations to someone who needed cheer. A woman made a donation in the name of her recently departed husband who was a quiet supporter of our work.
Several people phoned with hampers.
Yes, December's a tough month for many. But grace never shines brighter than in the darkest nights of December.
Rev. Harry Lehotsky
514 Maryland Street
Winnipeg, Mb R3G 1M5
(204) 775-4929
lehotsky@escape.ca