By Gary Curtis

Powerpuff Girls created by Craig McCracken and all related characters owned by Cartoon Network.

 

EXT-STOCK SHOT OF TOWNSVILLE SKYLINE - DUSK, AS THE SUN IS GOING DOWN.

NARRATOR: The City Of Townsville...a world class city...on the cutting edge of societal evolution. A place on the forefront of industry...

(Montage of modernized factories with futuristic robots assembling a variety of quality cars, appliances, etc,)

...medicine...

(A team of doctors in scrubs and masks stand around a table, where a man in a business suit has a mechanical heart quickly stuffed into his chest by one doctor, then gets off the table, smiling, tips his hat and leaves.)

...government...

(Shot of MAYOR MAYOR at his desk. His head is lying sideways on the desk, he's asleep with drool coming from his open mouth.)

...and above all, SCIENCE!

EXT-TOWNSVILLE CONVENTION CENTER-NIGHT

(Camera closes in on a well lit building, showing a banner draped above the entrance, which reads 'World Science Convention 2000'.)

INT-MAIN MEETING ROOM

(It is an auditorium, filled with men and women in formal attire. At the podium, PROFESSOR UTONIUM is being handed a statue of 'atoms circling a nucleus' by another man. The huge screen behind the podium displays a series of filmed sequences showing some of Professor's inventions in action.)

NARRATOR (voice over the film): Where our own Professor Utonium is receiving the Scientist of the Decade Award for his...

(A man is shown tipping an empty gasoline can upside down next to his stalled car; with a look of despair on his face. Then, he smiles, reaches into his pocket, produces two pills, drops them in the tank, gets in his car and drives away.)

...Instant Gasoline! And his...

(Another man gets out of his car holding a shoebox, trips and falls down, gets up and walks up the steps to his front door, trips again, gets up and goes inside, trips one more time. He takes a shiny new pair of shoes out of the box, puts them on, stands up, pushes a few buttons on a remote control, and begins dancing around the room like Fred Astaire.)

...Programmable Dancing Shoes! And his...

(A mouse spots a piece of cheese sitting on a wood tray. It ignores the brief electronic spark it causes by tripping a beam, and is trapped by a force field.)

...Better Mousetrap! But most of all, for...the Powerpuff Girls!

(A rapid-fire montage of the Girls in action appears on the screen, accompanied by appropriate music. A huge roar goes up in the auditorium and Professor receives a standing ovation.)

NARRATOR: But, not everyone is enjoying themselves this night.

(Whip pan to a dark corner of the auditorium where a MAN sits, alone and unnoticed. He is short and overweight, wearing a cheap suit that looks two sizes too small. He has bushy gray hair, moustache and eyebrows and has a slightly crazed look on his face.)

MAN: Bah! Showoffs! My ideas are as good as any of theirs! They just come up with them before I do!

NARRATOR: It's Professor Laggard! Geesh! Will you get a load of this guy? He's never had an original thought in his life! He probably got the ticket to this event the same place he got his PhD, from some online auction!

LAGGARD: I'll show them. I'll show them all! One of these days, one of my ideas will make me the richest, most famous scientist in the world!

( A cartoon light bulb goes on above his head. He gets a mad look in his eyes and with a sinister smile, rubs his hands together.)

LAGGARD: Or, one of THEIRS! Hahahahahaha!!

NARRATOR: Uh,oh, I don't like the sound of that! You don't have to be a genius to know that greed and stupidity add up to trouble!

CUT TO: EXT-A SEEDY LOOKING APARTMENT BUILDING-NIGHT

INT-AN APARTMENT

(Slow pan on a small, dingy, trash strewn apartment. Professor Laggard is seen from behind, sitting in front of his computer. The monitor bathes the dark room in an eerie glow.)

LAGGARD: Yeeeeeessss, I've finally found it! Out of all the millions of inventions, processes and formulae ever created, surely there must be thousands of them where someone got careless and forgot to get a patent issued or renewed. I'll just hack into the US Patent Office computers and get a list. Then I'll pick the best ones and patent them myself!! I knew I would come up with something someday!!

(He pecks away at the keyboard, then stands and turns to face camera.)

LAGGARD: Well, that should take half the night.

(He yawns and camera pans on him as he heads to bed. The printer can be heard starting its task. Suddenly, a 'ding' is heard and the printer stops. He stops, hunching his shoulders, and turns. The camera zooms on his face as it registers shock.)

LAGGARD: What?! IMPOSSIBLE! It CAN'T be finished ALREADY?!

(Camera pans on him as he runs to the computer and tears off the printout.)

LAGGARD: Oh, NO! Somebody beat me to THIS idea TOO! THERE'S ONLY FIVE ITEMS ON THIS LIST!!!

(With an expression of defeat, he pulls out the chair and sits.)

LAGGARD: Oh, well. Might as well see what they are.

(Camera reads over his shoulder. Only one item can be seen at a time.)

LAGGARD: Hmmm. The 7-day cottage cheese-and-cardboard diet. No wonder!

The blaze-orange stealth bomber. Ha! These are good for a laugh, if nothing else. Let's see...oh, yuck! Scratch-and-sniff baseball cards! (Sighs) This is a lost cause...perfect girl formula, what a joke! One more, and I can go to bed?

(His eyeballs swell cartoon style as he leaps out of the chair. Camera zooms in on his face.)

LAGGARD: Perfect Girl Formula? Wahooo!! Mr. Genius-of-the-Century forgot to get a patent on the Powerpuff Girls? I don't believe it!!

(He sits down and starts typing furiously.)

LAGGARD: I'll cross-reference with the product database...let's try Powerpuff, Power Puff, Powderpuff, and all their names....that ought to do it....

(After a brief wait his eyes light up.)

LAGGARD: EUREKA!!!! It's MINE! ALL MINE!! Now, I'll just file an online patent application for the perfect girl formula... in a week or so, I'll own the patent to the formula for the Powerpuff Girls! Then, I can sell the formula to the highest bidders! Once the idiot dictators of the world have paid me billions for the right to make their own Powerpuffs, I'll start mass-producing them for the home market. It'll be the greatest labor-saving device in history!! I'll be rich, rich, RICH!!

(He stands and dances around the room clutching the sheet of paper to his chest. Then, he stops with a worried look on his face.)

LAGGARD: But, wait! I can't carry out my plan while that fool Utonium has the prototypes in his possession! I've got to figure out a way to get them myself....and once I have that patent, it'll be a snap! Hahahahaha!!!

NARRATOR: Oh, no, this nutjob is going to create millions of Powerpuff slaves! Will anyone be able to stop him in time?

FADE TO BLACK

EXT-UTONIUM HOME-DAY

NARRATOR: The Utonium household, two weeks later...

INT-UTONIUM HOME

(Professor Utonium is wearing an apron, watering household plants in the living room. The doorbell rings, he walks to the door with the ceramic pitcher in his hand. He opens the door and a well-dressed young WOMAN stands there. She is holding a rolled up blue sheet of paper.)

WOMAN: Professor Utonium?

UTONIUM: May I help you?

WOMAN (hands him the paper, smiles): Here you are, Professor.

(She turns and leaves. He calls out to her, confused.)

UTONIUM: What's this?

WOMAN (answers without looking back): You've just been served. Have a nice day, Professor!

UTONIUM: What the heck is THIS all about?

(He stands with the door open, unrolls the paper, reads for a second. A look of horror appears on his face and, in slow motion, his pipe and the pitcher fall to the ground. The pitcher shatters and he screams.)

UTONIUM: NOOOOO!!

(With a flash of pink, green and blue, BLOSSOM, BUTTERCUP and BUBBLES appear at his side from elsewhere in the house. They hover in the air, looking concerned.)

GIRLS: PROFESSOR!!

BLOSSOM: Professor, what's wrong?

UTONIUM (drops the paper to his side, speaks in monotone): Girls, I'm being sued.

BUTTERCUP: What? Why?

UTONIUM (more animated): Some crackpot is trying to take you away from me!

BUBBLES (grabs onto him): NO!

BUTTERCUP: NO WAY!

BLOSSOM: Why, Professor? Can he do that?

UTONIUM (becoming angry): This Professor Laggard got a patent on the perfect girl formula and now he wants the court to have you declared prototypes and give him full custody of you! But I'm not going to let that happen!

BUTTERCUP (angry): You're darn right! Let's go beat the stuffing out of him!

(Bubbles looks ready to join her, but Blossom hesitates.)

UTONIUM: No, Girls! He hasn't done anything illegal. We'll fight him, all right, but in court, like civilized people!

(Blossom nods her head in agreement.)

BUTTERCUP (arms crossed, frowning at Professor): Well, gee, ya dummy! None of this woulda happened if YOU got that patent!

BLOSSOM and BUBBLES (horrified): BUTTERCUP!

UTONIUM: It's all right, Girls. Buttercup, a patent is something you get to legally protect your ownership of something. I don't own you. NOBODY owns you, your lives belong to you. So it never occurred to me to patent the process that led to your creation. I'm sure the court will see it that way, too. So, there's nothing to worry about!

BUTTERCUP: Yeah, but I say we should kick that guy's butt just for even thinkin' about it!

UTONIUM (sternly): Girls, I don't own you but as your legal guardian, I am responsible for you. And you will not lay a hand on anyone who is not breaking the law! Understood?

BLOSSOM and BUBBLES: Yes, Professor!

UTONIUM (frowning): Buttercup?

BUTTERCUP (frowning, too): Ah, fooey!

NARRATOR: Ah, Buttercup. I'm with you kid, I think the Professor's treating this a little too lightly, if you ask me.

CUT TO: GIRLS BEDROOM-DAY

BUBBLES: Blossom, what's gonna happen to us if we get taken away from Professor?

BLOSSOM: Don't worry, Bubbles, that's not gonna happen! The court knows that Professor loves us and takes good care of us!

BUTTERCUP: Yeah, Blossom, but what's this guy's reason for doing this? The only thing he got that patent for is so he can OWN us! What's THAT all about?

BUBBLES: Yeah, he called us 'typos'! I'm not a typo!

BLOSSOM (giggling): No, Bubbles, prototypes! Hey, wait a minute!

(She gets an angry look on her face.)

BLOSSOM: I know what this guy wants! With the patent, he can make more Powerpuffs and sell them! He could even sell us! If we are people, he can't do that; but if the court says we're his property, he can!

BUBBLES (shocked): We gotta stop that creep!

BUTTERCUP (furious): I'm gonna patent his rearranged face!

BLOSSOM: No, Girls! Professor's right, what he's doing is legal. But maybe he's up to something that isn't. Let's go!

(They fly out through their round windows.)

NARRATOR: And so the Girls fly off to learn more about the dastardly Professor Laggard's evil plans.

CUT TO: EXT- LAGGARD?S APARTMENT-DAY

(The Girls are floating outside Laggard's window, listening in with their super hearing as they watch him.)

BLOSSOM (holds up one hand to her lips, stage whispers): Shhhh! Let?s see if we can find out what he?s doing.

INT- LAGGARD?S APARTMENT

(The Girls' outlines are seen outside the window in the background. Laggard examines a contract that he has just taken from a fax machine.)

LAGGARD: Hah! The bidding is up to a billion per set! I ought to get 5 billion for the originals!

CUT TO: Girls.

(They each are holding up a hand to where their ?ears? are so they can hear Laggard better.)

BUBBLES (overjoyed): Wow, Blossom, I didn't know we were worth so much!

BUTTERCUP (grins): Hey, maybe we can get a piece of this!

BLOSSOM (gritting her teeth): Shut up, guys, this isn't funny!

LAGGARD: And once I've made my billions off of those fools, I'll mass produce Powerpuffs and make billions more selling them at $19.95 apiece! Hahahahaha!!

BUTTERCUP: $19.95?! Why that-!

( Buttercup crashes through the window.)

BLOSSOM: Buttercup, NO!!!

(She and Bubbles have no choice but to follow her in.)

CUT TO: INT

( Buttercup confronts Laggard and starts punching.)

BUTTERCUP: I'm worth more than 20 bucks, you jerk! Take this, and that, and one of these!

(Blossom quickly grabs Buttercup and pulls her away. Laggard gets up off the floor, dusting himself off but basically unhurt.)

BLOSSOM: You won't get away with this!

LAGGARD: Me? Get away with what? I haven't broken any laws, which is more than I can say for YOU!

GIRLS: Huh?

LAGGARD: Breaking and entering and assault. Don't worry, I won't press charges. But I WILL use this little incident to show what a poor job Professor Utonium is doing as your guardian. Imagine, allowing you to run free, terrorizing innocent citizens! Now, run along, I've got more offers coming in. Scoot!

(They give him a vicious glare and crash through the ceiling, showering Laggard with debris. He looks up at the hole and smiles and rubs his hands together.)

LAGGARD: Ah! Must remember to take pictures!

CUT TO: SKY OVER TOWNSVILLE

(The Girls are heading toward home. Blossom and Bubbles have angry scowls for Buttercup.)

BUBBLES: Thanks a lot, Buttercup! Now we might have to go live with that guy 'cause of you!

BUTTERCUP: Relax, you guys, Professor won't let that happen.

BLOSSOM: Well, you didn't help him any! He said not to touch anybody! As long as he has us, he's responsible for what we do!

(They fly along and suddenly pull up, staring at one another.)

BUTTERCUP: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

BUBBLES: I THINK so, but we need help!

BLOSSOM: Ms. Bellum! Let's go!

(They peel off and zoom away in a new direction.)

NARRATOR: Oh, I hope you come up with something, Girls; court is less than a week away!

FADE TO BLACK

EXT-TOWNSVILLE COURTHOUSE-DAY

(A large number of people are streaming through the doors to get inside.)

NARRATOR: The big day is finally here! Oh, I've got a bad feeling about this!

INT: COURTHOUSE

(The room is packed. Camera pans around to show the JUDGE, a man of about sixty with white hair, a deep voice and a no-nonsense demeanor. He is seated at the bench. The witness stand is to his left, the bailiff to the left of it. On that side of the room is the now-empty plaintiff's section, to the left are Professor and the Girls, who are seated next to him. Behind them, filling the room, are friends, well-wishers, reporters, camera people and standing along the back wall, a dozen armed members of Townsville's finest, in uniform. Among the familiar faces in the crowd are MAYOR MAYOR, MS. KEANE (the Girls' teacher), Mr. Cooper (the shopkeeper), Police Chief Hittledee, Talking Dog and for a brief second, someone who LOOKS like Craig McCracken. There is a loud hum of conversation, growing louder because the plaintiff has not showed up yet.)

JUDGE (slamming gavel): Order!

(The room grows quiet. Professor stands up.)

UTONIUM: Uh, your honor? I'll be representing myself.

JUDGE: Are you sure that's wise, Professor?

UTONIUM (gaining confidence, smiles down at the Girls, who smile back up at him): Your honor, I don't need a lawyer to tell you what the Girls mean to me and...

(The judge holds up his hand, with a slightly annoyed look.)

JUDGE: Professor, I must remind you that this case will be decided on facts and evidence, not emotions. Now, please sit down.

(Faint booing and a few raspberries are heard. The judge raps his gavel again. Blossom looks at Professor.)

BLOSSOM: Professor, maybe we should have a lawyer.

UTONIUM: Nonsense, Blosssom, everything will be fine. I'm not worried!

(Suddenly, there is a loud collective gasp from the crowd and most heads turn to the rear. Walking in through the doors are Laggard and his attorneys (one of whom is just an errand boy, basically). The chief lawyer is tall, tanned, very handsome and extremely well dressed. He is the very essence of power. His client looks like a street beggar next to him, dressed as we have seen previously, in the same undersized suit. Laggard?s hair and eyes have the same wild look as before. The flunky looks like he's fresh out of law school and happy to have a job. Flashbulbs pop as the three walk to the front and take their seats.)

BUTTERCUP (points): Hey! That's Jack Slasch, from the law firm of Slasch & Byrne! I seen him on TV!

BLOSSOM: He got a different lawyer!

UTONIUM: NOW, I'm worried!

(Slasch doesn't even look at them. In a showy move, he lays his briefcase on the table and opens it, pulling out a sheaf of papers. He hands several to the flunky, who hands them across the aisle to Professor. Obviously, they are copies of something.)

SLASCH (loudly): Jack Slasch for the Plaintiff, your honor.

JUDGE (not impressed): Very well. Both parties have agreed to have the case heard by me instead of a jury. You may begin, Mr. Slasch.

SLASCH: Thank you, your honor! Your honor, this case hinges on three main points. One, the status of what, exactly, the Powerpuff Girls are. Two, the issue of ownership. Three, the issue of public safety.

WOMAN (off camera, shouts): Your honor, for God's sake!

(Everyone turns to look. It is the teacher, Ms. Keane. She is standing, crying and shouting.)

KEANE: This is a custody hearing, not an issue of OWNERSHIP!!!

JUDGE (furiously banging gavel): One more outburst like that and I'll have you all removed! Continue, Mr. Slasch.

(Keane sits and the Girls turn to smile at her in reassurance.)

SLASCH: Ahem. If you will look at Exhibit One, you will see the (he holds up his fingers like quotation marks) 'birth certificates' of the creatures known to all as Blossom, Bubbles and Buttercup. They have never been legally recognized as persons under the law. This standard form has no entry for either mother or father; it's a joke! Exhibit Two is the application for legal guardianship submitted by Professor Utonium. On it, you will see, by his own admission, that they were 'accidentally created in my laboratory when Chemical X spilled into the perfect girl formula, and I feel responsible for their care and upbringing, as well as their training in the use of their superpowers'.

JUDGE: Well, we all know the story, Mr. Slasch!

SLASCH: Thank you, your honor! We do, and we know that they are ARTIFICIALLY CREATED! By a process, which removes the issue of their origin from that of parentage, to that of product, which is governed by the US Patent Office! Exhibit Three is the official patent issued by said agency, and it covers any formula, any derivitive formulae including any 'accidental' ones, and any product resulting from said processes. It is dated only a few days ago, because that is when my client obtained it, but you will notice that it is an original, and is retroactive to the dates stated in Exhibits One and Two. Therefore, as the patent holder, Professor Laggard is the legal owner of the Powerpuff Girls!

(A huge roar of denial goes up in the room. The Judge screams at all of them his final warning. The Girls and Professor just look at each other and shrug.)

UTONIUM (quietly): We knew this was coming, Girls.

(Buttercup scowls at Laggard, punching her other fist.)

SLASCH (pointing at Buttercup): There, your honor! You see? Those creations are out of control! Why, just last week (the flunky hands a piece of paper and a few photographs to the Judge, and also to Professor), they broke into my client's home and THAT one assaulted the Professor! That's the police report! Those are pictures of the damage they did! This is the public safety issue!

(Professor looks up from the evidence at Buttercup, with the slightest of frowns.)

UTONIUM: Buttercup, what did I tell you?

BUTTERCUP (scowling): Ah, he deserved it!

SLASCH: And that's not the only instance, your honor. My client will see to it that these creatures do no further harm to anyone or anything.

(The Girls stand as one and shout across the aisle, pointing at Laggard.)

BLOSSOM: Oh YEAH?

BUTTERCUP: How are you gonna do THAT?

BUBBLES: YOU FAT SLOB!!

(There is much laughter.)

JUDGE (looks at them sternly): You aren't helping yourselves any.

(They sit.)

JUDGE: Anything else, Mr. Slasch?

SLASCH (shrugs): What's to add, your honor? It shouldn't take you a minute to decide this case, it's cut and dried!

JUDGE: You know better than that. Your turn, Professor.

UTONIUM (stands): Your honor, you said at the beginning this wasn't about emotions but facts and evidence. Based on the facts, I have no argument to make. Mr. Slasch is correct.

(He sits.)

BLOSSOM and BUBBLES (stunned): That's IT?

BUTTERCUP (deadpan): Professor, that was BRILLIANT!

UTONIUM: Quiet, Girls, I'm not finished.

(He stands again.)

UTONIUM: Your honor, life is life no matter how it was created. My Girls deserve the same rights as you or anyone else in this room. I never dreamed of them as being my property and I don't know how any decent person could. Professor Laggard is using the law to do something evil, but Mr. Slasch is right, the law is the law. And we will fight using the law!

(He sits again and the Girls beam approvingly at him. Loud cheering and applause follows. The Judge quiets them down one more time.)

JUDGE: I am ready to make my decision. Girls, will you come up here?

(They float up in front of him. He leans forward.)

JUDGE (quietly): Girls, I am making this decision for your own good. I hope you understand that. Professor is right, think about that for a minute.

(He winks at them. They look at each other, then wink back at the Judge.)

GIRLS: We understand, your honor!

JUDGE: Good. Now stand over next to Professor Laggard.

(They float over to do so, but won't look at him.)

JUDGE: After listening to the facts in this case, and with no legal challenge to them, I find in favor of the plaintiff.

(Over the screams of outrage and his own gavel pounding, he continues. Professor sits, not reacting to the decision. He is watching the Girls.)

JUDGE: Professor Utonium's guardianship is hereby revoked and Professor Laggard is granted custody of the Powerpuff Girls!

(Instantly, the Girls begin pounding away on Laggard. The stunned onlookers go silent, except for Slasch. And Laggard, of course, who grunts with pain.)

SLASCH: Your honor, this is an outrage! I demand you stop this immediately!

(The Judge sits there. The bailiff and the dozen cops in the rear don't move a muscle except to smile, while the crowd begins to cheer and shout encouragement to the Girls. Professor Utonium is enjoying the moment.)

JUDGE: Stop what, Mr. Slasch? I'm not aware of any law that protects you from being beaten up by your own property!

(Slasch's eyes go wide as he realizes the truth of it.)

UTONIUM (sharply): Girls, that's enough!

(They stop immediately, and fly over to him, hugging him and smiling while they are cheered. Slasch helps his groaning client to his feet and shakes his hand.)

SLASCH: CongratulationsProfessorI'llsendyoumybillseeya?bye!

(He grabs his briefcase, turns and hurries from the courtroom, the flunky right behind as boos and catcalls follow them out. Laggard glares at everyone, finally resting his angry stare on Professor and the Girls. He draws a radio from one crumpled pocket.)

LAGGARD: So, you think you've won, do you? We'll just see about that!

(Into the radio): Get 'em, boys!

(Twenty armed men in camouflage gear kick their way through the rear and side doors, surrounding the Girls. They are able to lay out the first three goons apiece that reach them, but they are overcome and cuffed, rifles pointed at their heads. Professor tries to intervene but is held back by one of the men. The courtroom is in chaos.)

UTONIUM (shocked): Your honor, they can't do this?!

JUDGE (sadly): I'm afraid they can, Professor. Unfortunately, there isn't any law against capturing your own property.

LAGGARD (laughs): There's nothing you can do to stop me now, Utonium! The bidding is up to 7 billion for these three!

UTONIUM: Why, you!

(He manages to get free long enough to deliver a right cross to Laggard's jaw, knocking him down.)

GIRLS (struggling but going nowhere): Yay, Professor!

WOMAN'S VOICE (off camera): Not so fast, Laggard!

GIRLS: Ms. Bellum!

(SARA BELLUM charges through the rear door and rushes up to Laggard, stuffing a rolled up blue sheet of paper down the front of his cheap suit. The judge, Professor and everyone else is stunned, except the Girls, who have looks of joy on their faces.)

GIRLS: Ms. Bellum! We KNEW you'd get here in time!

BELLUM (a bit out of breath): Sorry it took so long, Girls, I burned up the city's computer figuring it out!

LAGGARD (grabs the paper, frowns at it): What the heck is this?

BELLUM: You are being sued by the City Of Townsville for 17 trillion dollars for property damages caused by the Powerpuff Girls, for the period covered by your patent!

LAGGARD: What? You can't do that!

JUDGE: Why not, Professor? You are responsible for damage caused by your property!

LAGGARD (throws the summons down): 17 trillion? I won?t even come close to breaking even! Fine! You want them so bad, you can have them! Those scratch-and sniff-baseball cards are looking better and better!

(He turns and storms out, the armed men let the Girls loose and follow him out. The Girls hug Sara and then cling to Professor Utonium. They are all smiles. MAYOR has come from the crowd to join them and stands next to Sara. The rest of the stunned crowd doesn't know what to think.)

BUTTERCUP and BUBBLES: Scratch and sniff WHAT?

BLOSSOM: Never mind. I don't want to know.

JUDGE (loudly): MAY I HAVE MY COURTROOM BACK? Thank you!

(Order is restored.)

JUDGE: I hereby reverse my earlier decision and return custody of the Girls to you, Professor Utonium. I will now rule on the motions you filed with the clerk this morning, pending the outcome of this case. Your motion to have the Girls declared persons with full rights under the Constitution is granted. Your request for permanent legal guardianship is denied. I am giving you temporary guardianship while your application for legal adoption is being reviewed.

GIRLS: YAAYYY!!!

JUDGE: When your adoption goes through, Girls, your new birth certificates will show your date of birth and that Professor Utonium is your adoptive parent. By the end of today, a Federal judge will declare Laggard's patent null and void. Girls, I am very sad that a judge in a courtroom had to decide that you are persons when everyone already knew it. This will never happen to you again. Professor, you should get that patent yourself.

UTONIUM: Thanks, judge, I will.

BUBBLES: But Professor, I thought you didn't want it!

UTONIUM: I don't, honey, but if anyone ever uses it to create living beings like you, I will have the legal means to take them away and see that they have a good home.

JUDGE: He's right, Girls, Well, that's it folks. Court is adjourned!

(He bangs the gavel and another cheer goes up from the crowd. He leaves the bench and the courtroom empties, leaving Professor and the Girls, Mayor and Sara standing alone.)

MAYOR: Hey, wait a minute! Somebody has to pay for all that damage! Looks like you're stuck with it, Professor!

UTONIUM (shocked) WHAT??!

(Sara and the Girls laugh. Sara hands Blossom a piece of paper and a pen and Blossom writes something on it.)

BELLUM: Relax, Professor. The Girls thought Mayor might do this. He's such a kidder!

MAYOR: Who's kidding? I'm not kidding!

BLOSSOM (laughs): Neither are we! Here's our bill for services rendered to Townsville since we were born!

MAYOR (takes the paper, is stunned): What?! 17 trillion and 25 dollars? Hmmm, I guess the City owes you Girls $25. Who wants ice cream?

(Everyone laughs and shouts 'Me! Me!')

BUBBLES: I want sprinkles!

NARRATOR: Hahahaha!! Oh, Mayor, you're so easy!

(Standard Girls with Hearts backdrop closing.)

NARRATOR: So, once again, the day is saved...thanks to the Powerpuff Girls! Hey, I want sprinkles, too!

 

THE END

Story written September 2000

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