CANNIBALSIM DOES NOT SUCK
So this one time there was this person who saw me eating this old lady. (No, I was not licking her pussy, you sick bastards, I was consuming her for nourishment.) They were like "Oh my gracious! You're eating that old lady!" and I was like "So what" and the person was like "I'm gonna report you to the police" and then he started to make his way to the police station, but I started to flap my arms like a chicken and I began to fly to the police station. (I had this ability because I am a secret agent and ALL secret agents can fly.) So when I got to the police station the I dug a hole under the "welcome" doormat so that when the person steps on it, they fall into the hole. I also put a spike in the hole so the person gets stabbed. So this idiot gets out of his car and starts walking to the door and I'm hiding behind the street light pole. And I creep up behing the idiot and yell really loud "BOOO!!!!" and the idiot goes "Oh my gracious it's Satan!" and falls into the hole under the welcome doormat. Then I took the body back home and I ate him.