CHECK OUT MY KICKASS CIA I.D. CARD:


LICENCE TO KILL, BABY!

Guess what, stupid? I can kill you whenever I want. I'm a CIA secret agent! Look at my ID. Doesn't it kick ass? Bet your ass it does. Don't agree with me, huh? Well you will once there's a nuclear missile up your fat ass.

I like being a secret agent. I get all the weapons and gadgets and babes I want. Don't tell anyone this, but Jennifer Garner [from "Alias"] is a real CIA agent and I've porked her 12 times. Heather Graham is one too, and I've done her so many times the skin on my dick begins to peel from porking her so many times.

I get all the weapons I want. My favorite is the All-in-one Laser blaster/nuclear missile launcher/chainsaw. It rules. One time I was doing Carmen Electra ('cause I'm so danm sexy) and then this bad guy walks in yells "Whoa dude!" but I pulled out my All-in-one Laser blaster/nuclear missile launcher/chainsaw and shot the bad guy with the laser while I was still doing the hot babe. Just to make sure, I blasted him with a nuke than I sliced him into pieces while I was doing Carmen doggy style. Oh yeah, I'm the best.

This one time I was on a mission to kill some guy. I saw the guy walking down the street and I said "Stop for I am cooler than you and I am the Best Person in the World" but he just looked at me like "yeah right" and so I said "I am not gonna ask again, idiot" but he just thrust out his arm and tried to push me but as soon as his hand touched my chest his hand began to melt because of the awesome power of my coolness. He was like "AAHHH! Please have mercy" but I was like "yeah right" and I burned his balls off with my heat vision. Then he was really like "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!" and then I turned my right hand into an axe and I chopped off his head. Then I turned it back into a hand. Then I flew back to CIA HQ to have lunch. Oh yeah, I can fly



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Copyright THE BEST PERSON IN THE WORLD 2003
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