ADAM

illustrated with drawings by Drew

[hey..]

Adam Blanchard is my boyfriend, and I love him. He lives in Grassie, population 12, which is ruled by the god of cows. He is a year older than me, 7 inches taller, and probably lighter. He has a goatee. One day, in the future when I obtain a scanner and also when wings begin to sprout out of my ass (therefore implying that NO I won't be getting scanner anytime soon) I will post a picture of him, he really is quite pretty. His main hobbies are playing badminton and Mariokart, and watching TV. His life is one of fulfillment.

Adam suffers from chronic laziness and lack of motivation. He believes he does not have to study or do any amount of work and he will still know everything. However, although he is quite smart, this is not the case. As of now he has no plans for the future (excepting the military, which IS an option) and is failing all his classes. We still love him though.

[calculus]

School is not kind to Adam. Its hard desks, chairs, and floors, and lack of a quiet and dark environment provide poor-quality sleeping space. He has been known to sleep in the hallway using his bag as a pillow. This is a mystery to me. It seems that his schoolmates have so far been nice enough not to kick him as they go by. They are probably intimidated by his Marilyn Manson, Ozzfest, and System of a Down shirts he likes to wear. When I use my superpsychictelekinetic power to look into Adam's future, I can see him either in the military, as he aspires, or as a cop.

[cop]
This is because he is the type to religiously follow rules, and would probably do a good job enforcing them. Also, Adam is a facist. My history teacher calls him a Nazi. He has been given other unfavourable titles as well. In the words of Ribzy: "Who likes white supremacy? Adam does! Hurrah!" Ribzy is just out to get everyone; Adam is certainly not like that. He is a very analytical, logical person, however, and believes in being fair over being right.

Adam has been many things, including:
-drunk
-a judge in a penis-length contest (that he did not take part in, or so he claims)
-accused of committing lewd acts in his school's playground in gr 6
-a badminton star

He's one of those people who actually reads outside of school, who can spell, and doesn't listen to rap. He is intelligent and funny, and his friends are great too; they seem to be included in the whole package. He's attractive and he's committed. That kind of guy is hard to find. He's never had another girlfriend; this means I can revel in my luck and NO OTHER GIRL CAN!!! Hahahaha.