That's Joyful. She's just as mental as I am, but in a different way. We're sporadic friends. Nothing sexual ever happened. The closest thing was one night in my bed when we had a conversation about lettuce. I told you we were both mental.

Astrology

And I


.....If you are the kind of person who likes to read about people's signs, then this part is for you. I've only found one astrology book to come close to being accurate. Naturally, it's not 100% accurate, but it's worth a laugh. The title of the book is SEXUAL ASTROLOGY. A friend of mine let me read her copy and I've been using it as a guide ever since. Here is the section about the libra male with a few corrections to make it fit me specifically.
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.....He was born under the sign of the scales, so what he strives for is balance and harmony. Life may be a seesaw, first one side up, then the other, but he can't help running back and forth to try to strike an equilibrium. His sensitive nature is happiest when the world around him is ordered and serene.
.....He is usually not the athletic type, doesn't enjoy participating in or viewing sports (except Paintball). Give him a board game-chess or backgammon or whatever- and watch his interest pick up.
.....He's a good conversationalist and expects you to keep up with him, so DO stay alert and brihgt. If you don't know Picasso from Beethoven, try to bone up.
.....He is kind, has a strong sense of justice and fair play, and will gice anyone an even shake. He is tactful, diplomatic, and has a keen sense of humor. By nature peaceable and loving, he will resent if keenly when an injustice has been committed.
.....In business he is marvelous at keeping his employees and associates happy. His instinct is for compromise and adjustment, the reconciliation of opposing sides. Because it is hard for him to decide an issue flatly, however, he tends to put off hard decisions. Often he needs a pratner who will do the emotionally unpleasant chore- like discharging an incompetent. (Actually, if the person really is incompetent, I enjoy getting rid of them. It's that whole ego thing.)
.....In a business dispute, he would prefer to have the issue resolved by an impartial panel of some kind, perhaps a jury. Of course, he'll want to be part of the jury. There is no one who has a better ability to smooth over difficulties, reduce tensions, and placate angry tempers-so the jury can reach the decision he wanted them to reach in the first place.
.....For this is the crux: Libra man is quite determined to have his way while avoiding the appearance of personal bias or involvement. If things don't go his way, you will suddenly discover beneath his rational, fair, and tolerant exterior a quite different man.
.....He has highly accurate intuitions, so don't try to deceive him. The only time the wool can be pulled over his eyes is when he's putting on his sweater. He is aware of hte reality of things, and when it comes to probing motives, he has X-ray vision.
.....However, even if he sees through you, he'll try to understand your reasons. And he won't get emotional about it. He hates making a scene. (Unless it'll be funny or help me win. I'll do ANYTHING if it'll get a laugh)
.....A man born under this sign loves his beauty in architecture, paintings, music, theater-and women. In courtship he weilds charm as a weapon. But while he may know most ways to lure a woman, he does have a problem. When she is ready, he's not sure whether to take her or not. (Too true...)
.....The reason for his indecision is that he is weighing the moment in a delicate balance. Everything must be perfect. The smallest particle of doubt sets him to work again, fussing with her levers and controls. Some girls love it, but they're usually the ones who delight in the exquisiteness of prolonged torture.
.....Don't lose hope. Let him know how much he turns you on and you'll find him warming to you quickly. If your man was born undder hte sign of the scales, you've already learned that when you do get him into bed it is a rewarding experience. The Libra male is determined to satisfy his mate-even if it takes all night!
.....In love, you can count on getting more than an equal shake. He believes sex is a rewarding experience, for both himself and his partner. And he has the patience needed to satisfy. Keep the lights low, and don't be vulgar or coarse. All you have to do is clearly indicate to him what you want when, and how you want it. You'll find him ready and willing to please.
.....In general: The Libran male responds easily to praise and flattery. You can coax him into almost anything with a few well-chosen compliments. He hates to hurt anyone's feelings, and so is usually at the mercy of an aggressive woman. (Sometimes. If I feel like it's just a means of manipulating me, my Tauran side takes over and I turn the whole thing into a messy break up before I realize what's going on.)
.....He's practically a pushover for a woman who knows what she wants from him. It's almost too easy for him to fall in love, and when he does it's hard for him to get out of the involvement. (Not anymore. I've had so many baaad experiences where I let myself become too attatched so that now I am perpetually on guard) One reason is that he hates emotionalism. The woman willing to make a scene has virtually won the arguement before it starts. (This, by the way, immediately leads to the Tauran side)
.....He became interested in girls at an early age-an interest that will continue all his life-but he's also a natural for marriage (HAHAHAHA! Not quite... To quote Woody Allen; "Marriage is the death of hope"). It's easy for him to fall in love. However, make all the plans for the wedding and include him out. He doesn't like to be bothered with details. They upset him.
.....He will be happiest if you display an even temper with not too many emotional highs or lows. He findsit a little difficult to differentiate clearly between friendship and love, but he is possessive. DON'T FLIRT WITH OTHER MEN.
.....He has a definite affinity toward women who dress well, have long hair, and he prefers lips to be slightly moist. One tip: If your clothes look as though they can be easily removed, he finds that VERY hard to keep out of mind.

His Sex Life
(read at your own risk)

.....While it's true that you have to lead the way, do bear in mind that he is eager to please and there is nothing he won't try. He is almost overly concerned about whether you have an orgasm. And he can become quite uninhibited with the right inducement. Do use your fingertips on him.
.....However, don't be impatient. If you try to rush him, he'll simply turn off and lose his erection. Nothing is more calculated to turn a passionate woman into a vexatious and frustrated shrew!
.....His deliberateness can make for exciting foreplay if you'll simply relax and enjoy it. The combination of art and leisure is likely to leave you completely satiated. He has an intimate knowledge of female anatomy, an active erotic imagination, and all the right intuitions.
.....Don't be deceived by his usually slight physique. The Libran male has staying power. He's slow, but he's steady, and the odds are that you'll be the first to cry enough!
.....Basically, he enjoys lovemanking tat avoids any suggestion of coarseness. He knows how to caress a woman's body, and by the time he has undressed her she is turned on. In foreplay he is patient, affectionate, and imaginative. What's more, his passions won't push a self-destruct button and disappear in five seconds-not while there is a whole world of wonderful sensation to explore. In the full sexual embrace, he is insistent, forceful, and has more stamina than any woman can ask for.
.....Sex for him is a rounded experience, not merely a quick tumble between the sheets. Your pleasure s what he has in mind while he's nibbling your breast or sucking your toes, running his tongue in circles under your armpit or along the inside of your thighs. When his fingertips lightly stroke your clitoris he knows just what kind of exquisite little sensations are shooting up into your brain. A favorite technique of the Libra male is to move with the light lip caresses to the area between the vulva and the anus. This gentle prodding near the anus is guaranteed to start any woman breathing heavily.
.....If you are the kind who can relax and enjoy this without some feelings of congestive impatience, more power to you. If you feel that all this foreplay has got to lead to something quickly, then you may have to take control. But do it gently. Beware of trying to order him about in the bedroom.
.....Forgotten to take the pill? If there is no other form of contraceptive handy, the Libran will be quite understanding. He doesn't mind being masturbated, having oral sex, or being relieved between your breasts or even clasped in your armpit. Anything that gives you pleasure is likely ot give him pleasure! But he wants to know exactly what is expected of him before the fun and frolic begins. On the other hand, he isn't likely to draw the line at anything-as long as he's been told in advance.
.....He is NOT faithful. Because he doesn't feel deeply, most of his relationships are shallow. He sees nothing wrong with carrying on two or more affairs at the same time. (Actually, I find infidelity to be a grave injustice and I've only done it once but that's a loooong story you DONT want to get me started on. Otherwise, if we're not officially dating, then yes, I'm out and about.)
.....His tendency toward voyeurism expresses itself in several ways. He gets pleasure from watching other couples fornucating, whether the other couple be male, female, or mixed. He may put a miror at the proper angle to watch his own lovemaking or ask his partner to join him in wearing a mask, thereby again creating the illusion of two other people.
.....He enjoys body painting. He will use a small brush to delicately paint certain areas of his own and his partner's body-with pleasingly erotic results. Some Libra males tape-record their bed sesions and play them back, so no vivid sound will be lost.
.....He is a connoisseur of refinement, a devotee of exotic varieties of titillation.
.....Libran male is very attractive to women-more gigolos are born under this sign than any other- and to homosexuals. Because the Libra personality is so finely balanced between the two sexes, he is often bisexual. (While I have sold my body to women for prices as little as a waffle and admissoin to Solar, I've never met a man who I was attracted to. Sorry guys.)
.....His basically easygoing and tolerant nature extends into all matters sexual. If his partner wishes to experiment with another man (or woman) he doesn't mind particularly. He is likely to be found in the middle of a menage a trois, and may very well, like the hero in the movie version of Cabaret, be dealing at one and the same time be both other members of the menage.
.....Because of his frequent voluntary sexual absinence (he waits until the mood is upon him), he is strongly inclined toward exotic varieties of masturbation. (I'm the best I've ever had!) Fairly common among Libra males ismasturbation while looking at photographs of women wearing furs and jewels. One Libra man told me that he would take his wife's fox fur with him into hte bathroom and tickle his penis with it until he was ready to come. Another liked to enter the bathroom while his girl friend was bathing, stand at the side of the tub, and masturbate directly on her.
.....Others prefer masturbation with more physical contact and for this purpose almost anything with a hold, or in which a hole can be made, will do. I've heard of doughnuts, fruits, toilet paper rolls, and sponges. And I'm sure some Libra males could add to this list. (!!! She (the author) makes it sound like we have no shame)

.....I'm going to stop there for now... If you -really- want to see the chapters First Moves, Last Moves, Erogenous Zones, or Your Sensual Guide, email me and I'll consider it.