Better Get It Right This Time

"Yeah Buffy, what are we gonna do now?" Dawn asked, looking out over her now fallen hometown.

Well, it wasn't where she had been brought into existence, that had happened millions of years ago, only god knows where.  But Sunnydale was where she had found herself. Literally.

"We're gonna live."

 Faith looked confused. "Well, duh B, we just like saved the world, that means no mass deaths, right? So yeah we're gonna live, duh."

"No, I mean were gonna take what they gave us, not let it be for nothing."

"What who gave us B?"

"The ones who died. The slayers, Anya"  She looked down.

"Spike."  She whispered.

Giles spoke gently, "Buffy, what," he hesitated, "What happened down there?"

She looked pleadingly, "Later Giles, I-I can't, not yet. I'll tell you tonight, okay? I'll tell you all tonight."

"Of course Buffy, whenever you're ready."  He cleared his throat.  "Speaking of which, it's getting late.  We won't have time to drive anywhere.  There 
are some camping equipment and tents that Xander and I got together as a precaution before we left. As there is very little chance any forms of demons will be disturbing us, I suggest we set up camp."

As soon as she finished setting up her tent that she would share with Faith, Buffy went in to lie down for a minute.  As Xander was walking by with firewood, he heard her sobs coming from inside.  Worried, he went to talk to the disturbed girl's Watcher.

Approaching Giles, he called out, "Can I talk to you for a second?"

After giving Kennedy some instructions, Giles stepped out of the slayer's hearing distance.  Xander sighed.

"It's Buffy,  I heard her crying in her tent, she sounds really messed up, what could've happened?"

"Well, I really haven't got the faintest idea, I suppose we'll find out tonight with everyone else."

"But,"  the boy looked uncomfortable, "You, you don't think she could be, you know, crying about Spike, do yah?"

"That does seem unlikely given their history, but they seemed to have grown closer lately.  I suppose she might grieve for him, yes. Why do you ask?"

Xander looked subdued. He hung his head.  "I- I feel like I'm the only one here who misses Anya."  He said softly.

Giles looked startled.  "No, of course not. We were all trying to keep busy, so as not to think about the ones who left us. I suppose Buffy's denial is rubbing off on us."  He wrinkled his brow.  "No, not all of us."

He pointed over to a small grove of trees where Andrew was sitting on a stump, a single solitary tear running down his face.  Xander nodded thanks, and
went over to talk to him.

Coming up, he said, "Hey, whatcha doin?" sitting down on a nearby rock.

Andrew looked up, then hesitated,  "I'm sorry she's dead.  She was the only one who paid any attention to me.  I-I think she would deny it, but she was my only friend."

Xander nodded,  "No, she wouldn't deny it. One thing about Anya that we all loved, even if most of us wouldn't admit it, is that she did admit it.  She
would always tell the truth."

Andrew nodded.  "Once she told me, that she actually loved humans, not just you, but humans in general. She said, that the thing about us was that
when it really mattered, we would fight.  We were stupid idiots for doing it, but we didn't give up, that's why she didn't. That's why we won."

Xander totally agreed, thinking that maybe he could convince the others to be a little bit nicer to Andrew.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 15 minutes after everyone had gathered around the immense campfire that Kennedy had made, Buffy came out and sat down.  She took a long look at everyone who had survived, then started to talk.

"You all fought today.  You took the chance, and it paid off.  Now you need to know how we won.  It took a team effort.  We all broke down their walls, but you need to know who landed the final kick, who placed the last punch.  When I was at the vineyard, I ran into an old friend.  Angel had come to back us up in this fight.  I told him I needed him to head a second front in LA, in case we couldn't hold them off; in case we couldn't kill them.  He went back, but before he did, he gave me something.  A pendant.  He didn't know what it did, but it was connected with the First.  It was supposed to be used by a champion, someone with a soul, but who was greater than human.  He said it wasn't for him, and it wasn't for me or Faith.  He said it was powerful, and that it might be able to help
us.  So I gave it to Spike. It was his calling, to be the champion.  When we were down in the Hellmouth,"

She broke off, furiously wiped at her eyes, and then dove back in.  "When we were down in the Hellmouth, it channeled into his soul.  It strengthened it, I guess. The light from his soul, and all the good it represented was too much for the first to handle.  It destroyed her.  It also dusted all the bringers. All the evil being released from the First, that destroyed Sunnyhell.  But, Spike said he had to see it through.  He wanted to see how it ended.  His soul killed him, and saved us."

She swept her hands out to all of them.  The Slayers.  The humans.  The watcher.  The principal.  The witch.  The key.  All of them.  Then she turned around, and walked away.

 After getting over the shock that Buffy's speech had caused, both Willow and Xander jumped up at the same time to go after their friend.  Giles gave Dawn a look and she walked over to him.

He simply said,  "Let them be."

Catching up with Buffy, Willow and Xander tackled her in a gigantic bear hug. 

After getting her breath back, Buffy looked at her two best friends, and whispered, "Thank you guys.  We'll always be best friends, right?  Does all this mean that nothing can stop us being friends?"

Willow smiled,  "I guess if our friendship survived a hell god, the first evil, a weird mixture of demons all in one body, your death twice, my turning evil, and Xander and me being vamps, it'll survive just about anything."

Buffy nodded,  "Xander, I'm sorry about Anya. We all love her."

A flash of pain crossed Xanders face, then it cleared and he said, "Thanks Buffy, and I'm sorry about Spike."

Buffy giggled, "I dont think anyone saw that coming."  Then she became serious.  "I think I need, like a minute alone, 'k guys?"

Willow nodded in understanding,  "Sure."

Buffy hugged her friends again. "Thanks you guys. It meant a lot."

Xander nodded, then putting his arm around Willow, they turned away.  Buffy walked slowly out towards Sunnydale.  They had set up camp about a quarter of a mile away, and she wanted to go say goodbye to Spike.  When she got to the chasm that was the remains of her hometown, she stopped.  She was just starting to think of how to say goodbye, because she knew Spike would be listening, when she heard a noise behind her.  Turning around, she saw a
bruised and bleeding figure lying on the ground, where she had been walking only a few minutes ago. She gasped.

"Spike?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After making sure Buffy had left the collapsing school, Spike relaxed.  He had seen the battle through, and made sure Buffy as safe.  Now it was time
for the clean up.  He knew, that if he had left with her, his soul wouldn't have been able to destroy the energy that the firsts form had left behind.  He saw the First's residue, as a dark shadow, streaking towards him.  He readied himself for a blast of pain, closing his eyes..but it never came.

Hesitantly, he opened his eyes, and saw that he wasn't in Sunnydale High anymore.  Where he was must have been another dimension.  It was just a vast
nothingness, white blankness as far as he could see.  It didn't appear to have any floor, or ceiling, but he was standing on something.  Walking forward a ways, he caught a glimpse of two gates.  He stared in awe.  One gate was a high wall of silver, the bars curling in a decorative pattern.  Beyond the gate, Spike could see a pleasant light. , with beings floating around it.  They seemed to be made of light as well. The second gate was jagged in design, obviously made out of some impenetrable iron.  While the other gate was closed, but not locked, this one bore a deadbolt.  On the outside.  As if to keep its patrons within. 

Spike gulped. 

Beyond the gate was a high wall of fire.  These had to be the Pearly Gates, and the Fiery Gates, as fictitious as it seemed.  Outside of each gate was a Guardian.

Spike approached the Pearly Gates first.  The Guardian there was nothing special.  Just a normal, human looking creature.  No halo, no wings.  The only thing special about her was the light that seemed to come from her as well. 

*Don't see whats so great about heaven,* Spike thought, *too bloody bright.* 

As he walked up, the Guardian said, "Your kind is not admitted here, be gone."

Spike nodded.  "Well, yeah, I sorta figured that, but seein' how I was so bloody good, and went and got myself a soul, and died savin' the world and all that, do ya' think I might be able to see one of the people you got cooped up in there one last time?"  He said hopefully.

"I will not permit you to harass the beings of Heaven in their peaceful rest."

Spike was ticked off.  "I dont want ta bloody harass her.  Joyce was my friend.  She was actually nice to me.  Well, aside from hitting me over the head with an axe handle."  He added as an afterthought.

"Your kind do not have friends."  The Guardian sneered.

"Well, if I can't see her, tell her Sp- no, William said hello..and thank you. Tell her I said that, will ya?"

The creature considered.  "I will grant your request damned one, now go to where you deserve."  She pointed at the pair of iron gates.

Spike sighed, nodded, and headed to the Gates of Hell.  As he approached, he could hear screams, inhuman screams of agony coming from beyond the wall
of fire.  He walked up to the Guardian of this gate, and eyed him with interest.  This one was definitely something.  He was tall, maybe 10 feet tall, all 10 feet shrouded in a black robe.  The hood was down, revealing a head that seemed to be covered in burns.  It was bright red, and letting off steam. In the place of hair, on the top of his head, he had a series of tiny horns. Black horns.  In his hands he held a beam of fire that was constantly changing shape, from fire, to a scythe, to fire, to manacles, to fire, to an axe. 

Breaking Spike out of his reverie, the guardian spoke. "You cannot enter here."

Spike shook his head in disbelief.  "Why the bloody hell not? Im a freakin' vampire.  You know, damned to hell for all eternity?!"  Wait, what the hell was he doing? Did he want to go to hell?!

The Guardian frowned.  "You have a soul.  No souls are allowed to pass through the Gates of Hell.  You must go to the other gates."

Spike was about to tell  the Guardian that he already had, but the other Guardian heard this comment, and did it for him.  "What?!  You cannot send this vile creature through the gates to Paradise!"

The Guardian spat back a comment that involved several words that Spike definitely wouldn't say around the Nibblet, and a fight ensued.  Spike stood patiently while the two deities fought verbally about who was to take him in.  *Great, not wanted even in the bloody afterlife* Spike thought bitterly.

After 10 minutes, Spike realized that these two could probably go on forever, and he was getting annoyed.  Patience had never been one of his strong points.

"Hello!  People, or gods, or whatever the bloody hell you are!  Will you please just tell me where the hell to go?!"  He glared at them. 

The two looked at each other, then the Guardian of Paradise sighed.  "You must return to earth until our superiors have come to a suitable agreement."  And with a swish of her hand, Spike found himself in a lot of pain. 

He was just starting to sit up, when he heard a voice say,  "Spike?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy rushed over to sit by him, sure that it was a dream, but knowing it wasn't.  When he tried to sit up, she used a gentle hand on his chest to ease him back down.  She saw that he was covered in wounds from their battle with the First.  The worst one a large gash across his abdomen.

"Spike" she whispered, "What happened, I was sure you h-had, I was sure  you had died."

Spike had his eyed closed, just reveling in her presence. "I did."  he answered simply.

Buffy looked confused, but didn't press it.  "We need to get you to camp.  That gash looks bad.  Nothing can happen to you again."

Spike chuckled, "careful Slayer, someone might actually think you cared."

Buffy eyed him with a penetrating stare. "I do."

Carefully, she helped him to stand up, and then with him leaning heavily on her shoulder, she led him back to camp.  When she walked into the light of the bonfire, several people gasped. 

Some of the slayers looked confused, and Rona voiced their suspicions. "I thought you said he died."

Buffy nodded, repeating Spike's answer. "He did."

The core scoobies hurried over, and without question, helped to sit him up against a pile of blankets near the fire, but not close enough to burn him, while
Buffy cleaned up his wounds.

"Spike?" She asked gently.

When he nodded, she said, "I saw you burn, can you tell us what happened?"

Spike nodded again, and launched into his story.  After he had finished, leaving everyone in awe, and Buffy with her concerned lines on her forehead, She propped him up against her shoulder again, and started leading him to her tent.

"You need to get some sleep, you're pretty badly beat up."

Spike looked at her in surprise. "Buffy, are you kidding, this isn't half as bad as when Glory got me, or when the First did, and I healed in about a week then."

She frowned but nodded, "Yeah, but then you were a vampire."

Spike looked confused, "Uhh, Buffy?  Still a vampire here."

She nodded again, "Yeah, but what if those Guardian thingies decide that the only way to work this out is for you to become a human?  Then your wounds would kill you, you'd bleed to death and-" She stopped, seeing the look on Spike's face.  "Okay, maybe that's just a little far fetched, but I don't want anything to happen to you."  She hesitated, then said,  "I'm going to say something again, and this time, youd better give me the right answer.  I love you."

Spike stared at her.  "Um, Buffy? Im not dying, you don-"

She cut him off.  "Wrong answer, try again.  I love you."

Spike looked doubtful, but Buffy saw a glimmer of hope shining through his eyes. "Are you sure?"

She faked a glare. "I love you."

Almost a question, he said,  "I love you too?"

In response, she leaned into him for a kiss, and he kissed her back, almost hungrily, as though he had been waiting too long for this.

Buffy thought, with guilt, *he has been waiting too long. So have I.*

She leaned back, "Bingo."

FIN