Like poetry?  Go here.  Follow the links to my poetry page.

This is the place where I will attempt to write down my thoughts on what I believe to be Smashing Pumpkins.

As you know, Billy has decided to end the pumpkins at the end of this year.  To me, I do sort of feel let down.  But, I think Billy's main reason is that he has totally become disillusioned with the whole music industry today.  I mean, all we hear is meaningless pop tunes on TRL and stuff like that.  I mean, there are no bands besides the pumpkins in America who actually do something new.  And the bands from Europe who do, i.e. Radiohead, are totally ignored in the US today.  Billy has had a plan for the Pumpkins ever since they started.  He knew exactly what steps he was going to take, and how long it will last.  He wanted to be a part of a revolution, he wanted to show how a generation feels.  And to those who he got to, he really did.  He sort of feels like a new alternative revolution is coming, and he doesn't want to be part of the old that the revolution is pushing out.  This probably doesn't make any sense at all to anyone.  But, this is the best way to explain what Billy is doing. 

- I have a suggestion to every pumpkins fan out there.  This is something that I have done quite a bit.  I will go back and listen to some pumpkins songs that I have never really listened to before because I didn't like them.  But, when I go back years later, I love the song.  Each song that they have done is totally timeless and will go on forever.  In my opinion, every song they have ever done is worthy of being a single.  Just go back and listen to Gish, I promise you that you will love it.  Listen to each album, cover to cover.  Your eyes will be opened to sounds you didn't believe existed before. 

- What is their best album?  In my opinion, it is Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness.   There has never been an album before or since that was put together in such a fashion.  A central theme exists throughout the whole album.  And I can't tell you what it is because it means so many different things to everyone.  The whole message of the Pumpkins is to be yourself and not be afraid of who you are.  I have learned so much from them on that.  I mean, every time I listen to the first song, chills run up and down my back and tears come to my eyes.  This music really saved me from a life of really hating myself.  I listen to this and all I can hear is that there is hope for everyone to be who they are.  Not being fake.  Not being afraid of your own emotions.  This is why so many people hate them, those people are scared to death of the non-conformity expressed in the pumpkins music.  We all have hope to be ourselves, this album just shows us that anything in the world is possible.  He wanted to make the Wall of our generation, but I believe that he actually made the Mellon Collie... of our generation.

An except from my online journal:
September 11th, 2000
As you might have already heard, the Smashing Pumpkins released their new material for their last album over the internet. I was one of the first two to come up with the idea for CD distribution and we have enlisted the help of others all over the world to help burn the CD and give it out to the world. The only thing that costs anything is the production and shipping of the CD so the cost is really really low and no monetary profit will be made at all. The news is finally getting out and I feel like a part of something much bigger than me. For the first time, the whole purpose of making music isn't skewed by record sales. The music on the new album is about as real as it gets with no lies to anyone at all. The real purpose of the pumpkins is clear and it lies with what they have done over the past few months. I can't believe that I am one of the key factors in this whole damn thing. They put the album in the hands of the fans to make it big, not in the hands of 60 year old men who would rather make a 11 year old scream than make any person smile and feel closer to themselves. I feel so excited about this whole thing. Each generation has something that puts their claim on the world, and I feel this is my first chance to really change the world for the better. I can't get over how inspired this makes me. I know that I have gotten myself into deep shit with all the work I will have to do to get this CD and music out to the masses, but I don't fear it because I love the work and it is more important than money or taken time.

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