The world was
robbed when it lost you.
It lost warmth, comfort, selflessness, and unconditional
love.
But your gentle influence will live on in my heart as well as those of many others,
and your wonderfully
generous spirit will touch us all forever.
You
affected everyone you encountered down here, mom,
and personally
I
still feel you touching my life every day and in so many
ways.
Sometimes, it's a
simple judgment call I'll need to make,
and other times it's a potentially life changing
event.
But each time your gentle nature, clever wit,
and insightful way
of looking at the world
have become
a part of who I am,
how I live my life, and how I make my decisions.
I
just hope I can make you proud, mom.
I have wanted to for as long as I can
remember.
Do you get to watch us from up there?
Do you get to smile proudly, hold your head high,
and say things like, "See, I told you he could do
that"?
And mom, do you get
to walk and run and dance again?
Will the rest of us ever learn to be be as caring, generous, forgiving,
and optimistic as you learned to be?
Do you now get to know the
answers to questions like these?
I sometimes feel that with you watching over my shoulder
I should be able to learn your amazing sense of
"life magic",
but without your comforting voice on the phone ("Hi, honey, it's your mom")
I seem to often
lose my way.
I love you and miss you, mom.
I wish I'd told you more often while you were
here.
I suppose that is a common and useless wish for those of us left behind,
but I will wish it nonetheless, until it's
my turn to be up there next to you.
Perhaps I can
then look into your eyes and finally make up for
all of my carelessly overlooked
earth-bound opportunities.
Keep watching over me, please.
I always secretly
relied on you and your strength,
and will shamelessly continue to do so.
Be there for
all of us who were fortunate enough
to have been touched by your magic,
and feel
free to tap us on the shoulder when
it looks
to you like we need
your reminders.
Please continue
to help guide our lives with the gentle,
nurturing love that you always seemed able to give,
no matter the pain and frustration you endured
while doing so.
Teach us your wisdom and strength
of character and,
above all, show us how to be strong
in the face of fear,
adversity and
hopelessness.
You certainly were.
But most of all, beautiful lady, be at peace.
The horrible pain is finally gone.
Always know that although "it" may have beaten you up
enough to win the battle you
fought to remain with us,
you, your spirit, and your passion for life will always live on
in
those of us who loved you dearly.
I miss you, mom.
I hope Heaven is treating
you better than Earth did.
Love, your son
PS
- I wish you'd been able to meet Rebeccca and hug your grandson, Rhyen.
Thank
you sending them to me, and for who Rhyen is and will be.
He will know your touch, learn your magic, and
carry your generosity in his heart
.
PPS - Say "Hi" to Rebecca's
mom, Roberta. And tell her I said "Thank you".
National Multiple Sclerosis
Society
