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This is just a quick one-shot story. This includes a big chunk of longterm spoilers and rumors floating around right now (August 2007). A lot of them probably won't come true and some of them are already happening. Either way, if you're spoiler free from the show, you probably don't want to read. I started this a few weeks ago, so it's probably already outdated, lol.
This story is from the Spencer character's point of view as if they were the actors on the show. If that didn't make any sense, don't worry. This is just meant to be a funny story, nothing serious ;) I just love my Spencers and this just my way of showing it.
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"Alright, alright," Luke sighed, making his way to the front of the gathered crowd. "I'm calling this monthly Spencer meeting to order."
The group of people muttered loudly as they tried to elbow each other for more room.
"Dad, why are we meeting down here again?" Lulu sighed. "It's too damn cramped."
Luke frowned at that. "Gumdrop, the catacombs is the only place we can all meet without anyone noticing."
"Lulu's right," Lucky sighed. "There's too many of us now."
"They're right, honey," Laura sighed in agreement.
He glanced at his wife. "Oh come on, Angel. You like the catacombs."
She rolled her eyes at him. "No. You like the catacombs."
"Can we just get this started so we can get the hell out of here?" Carly huffed. "Jax is gonna be wondering where I am."
"He's probably too busy out looking for nuBrenda to notice," Jason reminded her.
She elbowed him in the ribs. "Shut up, no one asked you."
"Why is he even here?" Lucky asked. "It's his fault I'm acting all OOC."
"OOC?" Luke questioned.
"Out of character. I'm screaming at my wife accusing her of stealing our own kid. Come on! When would I have done something like that? And it's all to prop his ass," Lucky told the other family members, pointing at Jason. "Now I'm walking around like a goof 'cause she's in love with both of us. People are yelling at me because I arrested him, which last time I checked, is part of my job. And don't even get me started on that kid. All in the name of Jason!"
Jason simply shrugged. "Sorry, dude, I just do what I'm told . . . Why am I here again?" he asked Carly.
"Cuz you're my best friend," she simply shrugged, linking her arm with his. "And one day you're gonna be an official member of this family whether you like it or not."
He rolled his eyes at her.
"I saw that," she told him underneath her breath.
"Excuse me," the southern drawl interrupted. "But I'm not a member of this family either. Can I go?"
"Who the hell are you?" Luke asked the young man.
"He's Lulu's boyfriend," Carly clarified with a grin.
"No, he's not," Lulu huffed insulted. "I hate him."
"Yeah, right," Logan replied.
Luke narrowed his eyes, finally recognizing him. "Your Baldwin's kid, aren't you?"
Logan simply shrugged.
"He is," Lulu replied for him. "But he's nothing like him."
"No way in hell is my kid dating a Baldwin."
"Leave her alone, Luke," Laura sighed. "He seems like a nice young man."
"He seems like trouble."
Logan smirked in his direction.
"Look at him, Laura, he's a punk."
"Can we stop picking on Logan?" Lulu asked.
"He's here, he gets to be interrogated."
"I don't even know why he's here!" she cried. "He's supposed to do some shitty stuff to me in a couple weeks and I'll be all whiny about it and people will hate me even more."
"No one hates you, Lulu," Lesley sighed.
"Yes, grandma, they do."
"Don't worry about it, sweetie," Carly offered. "Most people hate me too, but I don't give a shit."
"Don't worry, you got me," Logan offered. "And the last thing I feel for you is hate."
Lulu snorted in return. "Gee, that makes me feel so much better."
"He reminds me of you," Laura told Luke.
"Oh god, don't say that," he groaned.
"Can we get back on schedule here people?" Carly huffed again. "Seriously, Jax--"
"Blah blah blah," Lucky interrupted. "When the hell did he come back to town anyway? Isn't he off somewhere 'protecting' his psycho brother?"
"Shut up, Lucky."
"Ok, all of you shut up," Luke shouted above their voices. "First things first - family attendance and roll call. Barbara Jean Spencer?"
"Here."
"Caroline Jacks?"
"Here."
"Elizabeth Spencer?"
Lucky snorted to himself. "She's probably out looking for Jason."
"Ok then. Laura Spencer?"
"Right here."
"Lesley Webber?"
"Here."
"Lesley Lu Spencer?"
"Here."
"Lucas Lorenzo Spencer II?"
"Here," Lucky sighed.
"Lucas Jones?"
Silence answered.
"We never found that kid?" Luke asked after a moment of murmuring.
Bobbie sighed. "He kinda disappeared after Tony died and he told everyone he was gay, remember?"
"Anyone seen young Lucas around lately? . . . Lulu?"
"Sorry dad, he's MIA."
"Wait, people just disappear around here like no big deal?" Logan asked her appalled.
"Pretty much," Lulu shrugged.
"Nikolas Cassadine?"
"I think he's somewhere with Emily," Lucky volunteered.
"Of course he is," Luke muttered.
"Stop it, Luke," Laura admonished him.
"Alright already. And the following folks are Spencers or married to Speners but not attending these meetings: Michael and Morgan Corinthos, Cameron and Jake Spencer, Spencer Cassadine, Jasper Jacks, and Tracy Quartermaine."
Logan leaned closer to Lulu. "Why aren't they here?"
"The kids are too young. They gotta be at least sixteen. And Tracy obviously isn't here because of my mom. If my mom ever comes back for good, Tracy's out."
"That's kinda cold."
Lulu shrugged. "It is what it is."
"I still don't understand why Jax can't come to these meetings," Carly broke in.
Luke sighed as he glanced at his niece. "You know the rules, Caroline. You're allowed one guest. If you want your husband here, Jason gets to stay home.
Jason sighed. He'd never not been to one of these meetings. Carly always picked him over her current husband.
"Fine. I want Jason to stay."
"Finally," Luke continued, "Non-family guests, please state your names for the record."
Jason rolled his eyes. He'd been to too many of these freaking meetings and he was still considered 'non-family'. "Jason Morgan."
"Booo," Lucky cat-called.
"Hisss," Lulu joined in.
Carly giggled but stopped when Jason glared at her. "Your fault," he told her.
She shrugged non-pulsed. "Don’t blame me, home wrecker."
"New kid?"
"Logan Hayes, sir."
Laura grinned at him and shared a look with Lulu.
"Laura, honey, don't encourage her."
She shrugged in return.
"Ok, new business. As you all know, I'll be back to town officially in the fall."
"What about mom?" Lulu asked hopefully.
"I'm sorry, sweetie," Laura sighed.
Lulu frowned and Logan wrapped an arm around her, which she didn't protest.
"Any other business?"
"I want Liz off my invited list."
Everyone murmured in response.
"Good for you, Lucky!" Carly cheered him on. "Don't worry I'll find you someone new. Someone better."
Lucky watched her warily at her promise. "Um, no thanks. I kinda got my hands full right now."
"Lucky are you sure about this?" Laura asked him.
He shrugged. "It's pointless. Why have her around when she wants to be with someone else. Besides, I think I finally find out I'm not my kid's father sometime this year," Lucky muttered unhappily. "At least I hope it's this year."
Carly frowned and elbowed Jason again.
"Damn, Carly. What the hell was that for?"
"You made my cousin sad," she told him simply.
"Again, not my fault."
"Nothing's ever your fault," Lulu muttered from her corner.
"Alright, anything else?"
"There's some stupid mob war coming up," Carly sighed in a bored tone.
Everyone groaned in response.
"Every year there's a mob war," Bobbie added with a roll of her eyes. "Nothing ever happens at GH anymore."
"But this mob war is one to end all mob wars," Carly informed them.
Everyone snorted in return.
"Who's all gonna be involved in this war?" Luke asked.
Carly, Jason, Lucky, Lulu, and Logan raised their hands.
"Ok, well be careful," Luke sighed. "All of you. Anything else?"
Everyone remained silent.
"Barbara Jean anything to add?"
Bobbie huffed from behind a rock. "I haven't even been on for like a month. I'm only pulled out for weddings and funerals."
"Right. Anyone else?" Luke sighed and shifted on his feet preparing himself for what was next. "Ok then. Next order of business . . . complaints and airing of grievances."
Everyone started talking at once.
"Shut up!" Luke bellowed again. "Every damn month we go through this same routine. We go alphabetically like always." Everyone settled down after a brief moment. "Ok then. Barbara Jean?"
"I don't have a storyline," she huffed for what had been the millionth time. "They brought Jerry back and I haven’t even been in a scene with him. Jerry! I was engaged to the guy. Doesn't anyone remember that? He got arrested when we were standing at the alter."
"I remember that was the night Jason kissed me."
"It's not always about you, Carly," her mother informed her.
"Says who?" she muttered under her breath.
"Anything else, Barbara?"
She shook her head resigned.
"Carly?"
"I think Jase is right. Jax is gonna be busy involved with nuBrenda. Where the hell does that leave me? I don't wanna be stuck with Sonny again. And I really hate all this mob bullshit." She turned to face Jason. "And don't even get me started on the fact that you had a baby with that -- that twit and haven't even told me yet. Me! This is all your fault. If you would have just sucked it up and went ahead and had done that storyline where Jason falls in love with Carly, we wouldn't be here."
He pinched the bridge of his nose, already familiar with this grievance. "I was young and stupid. How many times do I have to say it?"
"Whatever," she huffed. "And now I might be sleeping with Jerry. Jerry! Like mom said, she was engaged to the guy. How many times am I gonna get stuck with her leftovers? Plus hello, I'm not having any more kids. If they make me pregnant with Jax's kid, I'm totally miscarrying. I already know it. The next baby I pop out will be Jason's."
Jason groaned. "We're just friends, Carly."
"Liar," she huffed. "You love me and you know it."
Luke rolled his eyes at his niece. They had been hearing this conversation since November 1999. "Anything else, gumdrop?"
"I think that's enough," she muttered angrily.
"Angel?"
Laura sighed heavily. "I'm not coming back anytime soon," she told her family. Lucky and Lulu both frowned and her heart sank at seeing her two children looking so destroyed. "I'm sorry, kids. It's out of my hands."
Luke placed a steady hand on her cheek. "We'll never stop missing you," he assured her.
"I know," she sighed.
"It's so not fair," Lulu muttered.
Logan was taken aback by her sadness. "It'll be ok, sweetie," he told her tightening his hold on her.
"Lesley?"
Lesley sighed as she stood from a nearby rock. "I'm worse off than Bobbie. At least she's seen around GH sometimes. I wasn't even around when Laura was hospitalized."
"You got to tell it to Scotty at the courthouse when he was given guardianship of Laura," Logan reminded her.
She grinned at that and winked at Logan. "Very true! I just wish I could have slapped him."
"Sorry, they left that for me," Bobbie reminded her.
"I'd like to come back and slap him," Lesley concluded. "He deserves it."
"No arguments from me, Les. Lucky?"
"Um, did I mention the whole out of character thing? Losing my kid thing? And having to prop him?" he pointed to Jason again. "And now they want to stick me with Sam."
Carly wrinkled her nose at that. "She's a whore."
"You totally deserve better, Lucky," Lulu assured him.
"What about you and Liz?" Laura asked him softly.
Lucky shrugged. "Why would I want her back after the lying and cheating and her being in love with someone else?"
Again Carly elbowed Jason. "Carly, stop it," he told her shuffling as far away from her as possible, which wasn't much.
"You're such a jerk. Why'd you do this to Lucky?"
"Not. My. Fault."
Lulu rolled her eyes at them. "Why do you two always have to fight?"
Carly's eyebrow ascended. "I could ask the same of you Miss Lulu. You're always fighting with Logan there. Me and Jason do it because we love each other. Why do you two fight?"
Lulu crossed her arms across her chest and narrowed her eyes at her cousin. "I don't love Logan."
Quiet snickering was heard throughout the catacomb.
"Hey, stop picking on the princess."
"Thanks, dad," she smiled.
"Son, anything else?"
Lucky shrugged. "I'm sure I'll have more next month."
"Fair enough. Princess?"
Lulu cleared her throat and untangled herself from underneath Logan's arm. She didn't miss her father's glare. "Um, Logan sleeps with me because of a bet he made with Maxie. And there's possibly a videotape involved."
Lucky and Luke glared hard at the young man.
"Whoa, there," Logan told them, placing his arms up in innocence. "I'm the new guy, remember? I gotta do what they tell me or I'm outta here. And in my defense, I do start to have feelings for her after we sleep together."
"I don't blame him," Lulu nodded in agreement. "I just think it's shitty that they're rewriting crap that happened two years ago. Couldn't they come up with new shit?"
"Lulu, watch you language, honey," Laura sighed.
Lulu grimaced. "Sorry, mom. I mean, it's bad enough I don't like the guy--"
Again snickering around the room was heard. "I don't," she protested.
"They believe your lie as much as I do," Logan whispered to her.
"Whatever," she huffed. "Plus it's totally unbelievable that I'd hit the sheets with Logan so soon in our," she waved her hands around, "relationship or whatever after all that crap that happened last summer with Dillon. Talk about OOC."
"Lulu's right," Lucky sighed. "We're all being screwed over. Unless your name is Jason, you don't stand a chance."
Jason put his hand to his ribcage before Carly could elbow him again. She smacked him across his arm instead.
"Saint Jasus rides again," Carly huffed, insulted on her family's behalf.
"Ok, can I air my grievances now?" he asked the family.
"Depends. Lulu, are you finished?"
"Yeah," she muttered and leaned back against Logan again.
"Alright, Jason, go ahead."
"Why am I being blamed for everything that goes wrong in town? It's not my fault that they come up with these ideas. I mean come on! They got me with that kid, Spaghetti--"
"Spinelli," Lulu corrected him.
"Whatever. They got me mooning over a chick who's my little sister's best friend. Where the hell do they come up with this stuff? Plus, I'm taking off my shirt in the weirdest situations--"
"Um, that was my idea," Carly confessed. "I wanted to show that there's still a little something something going on between us."
Jason rolled his eyes. "And not to mention the fact that I'm a freaking janitor on that other damn show that has nothing to do with what's going on now. And, oh yeah, my ex-girlfriend is acting all psycho. I think I'm totally blameless in this mess."
Lucky snorted as did Lulu and Carly.
"Whatever, Jason," Carly muttered. "You've got it so bad. Boo fuckin hoo."
He narrowed his eyes at her.
"I agree with the lot of them," Luke offered. "You wouldn't be in this mess if you were in the family officially."
"What?"
"You should of married me, you idiot. That's what Luke's saying!" Carly threw her arms up in disbelief. "Unbelievable."
"How many times do I have to say I'm sorry? We go through this every freakin' month."
They continued to argue until Luke put his hand up. "Fine, we get it. Anything else?"
Jason shook his head and Luke turned to Logan.
"Alright, newbie, anything you'd like to add?"
Logan cleared his throat and smiled at Laura. "I just wanted to apologize in advance for anything I may do in the future that may cause harm to your daughter. I'm just following orders at this point."
Laura smiled at him and Logan was struck by how similar she and Lulu were. He turned to face Lulu. "I'm sorry," he told her softly.
Lulu's eyes fluttered a bit and she couldn't help but smile. Luke rolled his eyes at the scene.
"Sweet Jesus, laying it on a little thick aren’t you, Tex?"
"I think he's sweet," Carly informed them. "And cute."
Jason snorted. "You would."
"Jealous?"
He shook his head without looking at her.
"And finally - me. I'd like to say that no matter what, I'm proud of all of you." Luke took his time and looked at each one of the person's before him. "You've done the Spencer name proud by being who you are. Yes, we've been shitted on and it'll never really stop, but we just keep coming back stronger. We have to keep fighting. Because we're Spencers and that's what we do."
Everyone murmured in agreement. And Luke finally smiled. "Alright then. Anything anyone wants to add before we close?" No one responded and Luke sighed. "Ok, see everyone next month."
Bobbie and Lesley walked out of the catacombs together muttering about heading back to the backburner. Lulu and Logan were the next ones out.
"Wow, you sure know how to show a guy a good time," Logan told Lulu as they made their way to his apartment.
She snorted in return. "You should see our family dinners."
"Carly, seriously, I don't need you to find me a new girlfriend," Lucky tried to tell Carly.
"C'mon Lucky. What about one of those new nurses at GH?"
"Carly, leave him alone," Jason tried to intervene.
"Shut up, Jason," Carly and Lucky sighed.
"This is all your fault," Carly told him again. "Lucky and Slizzy should be together with their 2.2 kids."
Jason pinched the bridge of his nose. "Sweet Jesus. I am not coming to one of these things again."
"Oh, no," Carly warned him. "You'll keep coming 'til I'm buried in the ground."
"Sounds like you're the one that needs help," Lucky told him with a laugh. He paused slightly. "I still hate you."
"Whatever, so does everyone else."
"Not St. Robin and St. Lizzy," Carly sing-songed.
"Who's the jealous one now?" he smirked in return.
Her mouth fell open in surprise. "I am not jealous."
"Liar," he muttered.
"Will you two stop already?" Luke yelled from behind. "You two are worse than an old married couple."
"No, we are not," Carly huffed.
"Think again," Laura told her. "You remind me of Alan and Monica. Always fighting no matter what."
"He's dead," Jason reminded them.
"Details," Luke shrugged.
"Are you really comparing us to a done couple?"
"Alan's still around."
"He's a ghost!"
"Again - details," Luke smirked.
"He and Monica were together for years. Always fighting, but always in love," Laura told her softly.
Carly stopped at that and finally grinned. "Maybe there's a chance for us after all," she told Jason linking her arm in his. "Plus that Guza guy seems to like us."
Jason finally smiled and shrugged. "Maybe one day, Carly."
She laid her head on his shoulder as they made their way out of the catacombs.
Laura sighed as she watched them. "You think there's hope for us?" she asked Luke
"Always, darlin'. always." he kissed her temple and took her hand. "I always hate saying goodbye to you."
"Me too. But there's always a chance I'll be back soon."
They stopped at the entrance of the catacomb. "Ready to go?"
She shrugged. "Do you think the kids will ever figure out the only reason you have these meetings is for all of us to get together?"
He snorted in return. "I'm not that sentimental."
"Liar," she grinned. "You love them all."
"Just don't tell them that."
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