Title: Resurrection

Series: Part 1 of 4

Author: Bell Pie toggledog@yahoo.com

Fandom: Harry Potter

Pairings: Harry/Draco, a hint of Sirius/Remus

Rating: PG13

Authors Notes: Harry’s POV.

It was the eternal struggle. The vicious battle between good and evil, light and dark, raging in our souls. A despoilment of the very ones he had been taught to despise. That it should have happened in that particular place was no accident.

"It’s fitting, isn’t it? That we should degrade something these muggles respect so much."

He laughed, the sound eerily low, fitting with the almost suffocating silence of the room. His words forced a shudder to run through my frame. This was to be expected but it still did not stop the coil of anger rizing in my stomach. I knew not to argue it, simply because he didn’t know, himself, the reason why he bought me here, to this muggle sanctuary. Sometimes, people’s motivations are clearer to others than to themselves.

It was here that I found the ancient muggle book. It would cause a stir at Hogwarts when I opened the yellowed pages to the others. Indeed, Hermione gave a little squeak of delight and snatched it from my fingers.

"This is a religious book, Harry."

These words meant nothing to me. Upon flicking through it, there was only one word that stood out.

Resurrection.

I liked it. I liked the way it felt on my tongue to say it. I liked the prickle it sent down my spine when I associated the word with that one act.

He would laugh when I talked about the night of our ‘resurrection’ derisively but not in a harsh way. "It’s just a stupid muggle fable, Harry. Because they need something in their pathetic lives to make them feel complete."

Harry. It had taken him three months to build up to actually saying my first name. But then, it took me that long to tell Hermione and Ron. We still played out our little act in school. Hate him, hate him, hate him. And I did. He baffled me. Around others the close to impenetrable wall he had constructed grew a foot longer with spiky coiled wire at the top and dementors guarding the bottom.

And I loved him, when he allowed me to chip through, a piece at a time, only when we were alone. It was in these perfect moments in time that he allowed me to really see him for the first time. And he would talk and talk. About Lucius, who I couldn’t comprehend his adoration of, about magic and spells, about Quiddich. In fact, we both talked a lot about quiddich.

I would be delighted by every new discovery; the way he bit into his left little finger when he was intensely concentrating; his superior tutting as he picked up a very large and very poisonous green scorpion by his fingers as I stood at the far corner of the room, paralyzed with fear; his own face streaked with terrorized tears from the large spider that crawled onto his hand after he placed his hand down the back of a cupboard to retrieve a fallen wand.

He laughed so easily. About everything. One of my biggest lessons was that his laughter wasn’t necessarily due to the humiliation of others. A significant part of our time together was spent laughing.

And fighting. He couldn’t bring himself to like Hermione and Ron, his prejudice too inbuilt. I would challenge it often, chipping at it a bit at a time. But it was hard work. From when he was a baby it had been drilled into him that pure blood wizards were superior, that everything else deserved their derision and hatred. I often wanted to slap the chagrined look off his face. But knew it would be pointless. All that would happen was real bruises would be added the emotional ones we had been inflicting on each other.

And loving. We would sneak out to go shopping together in Hogsmeade, him saying that I deserved better than what I wore, that it would be good, for my own confidence (and, I suspect, his). In a suspicious eyed wizard clothing shop he thrust a navy green shirt into my hands, telling me it would "Suit your eyes," before a tinge of pink discolored the pale skin and the corner of his lips turned up in a small smile that made me want to pull him into my arms right there. Knowing I couldn’t. He didn’t tolerate any display of public affection.

We snuck off to an empty compartment on the Hogwarts Express, both wanting one more fragment of time together before returning to our relations, if they could be called that, in my sake.

"I’m thinking we should sneak into my house wearing the invisibility cloak," I said, coyly, knowing such item had much use over the past six months. "It would be hilarious to see Uncle Vernon’s-"

Something in his face stopped me. "What?"

"You didn’t think this would continue post Hogwarts, did you, Potter?"

Potter. I think it was that, more than anything, that burst the balloon growing in my stomach. I could only stare at him, trying to gauge my own reaction. Indeed, my mind screamed at me that I was angry, only my body wouldn’t comply. I only felt a dim shock.

"You know I can’t see you now school’s over." He said it with such conviction.

"You bastard." It wasn’t said with venom, more a sudden certainty. "No, I take that back. You coward."

This was good. The anger was finally arriving. "Why? Because you can’t bear anyone finding out? No, because you can’t bear Lucius finding out."

He stood up. "I’m bored."

He took a step towards the compartment door, then stopped. I stood behind him, trying to find in my muddled mind my next words. All I knew was he couldn’t reach that door and walk out.

He turned to face me, the mask placed over his face, the familiar fake smirk. "You’ll be fine. I’m sure Weasly would be dying to fuck you."

That was it. Not only was he now insulting my best friend, he was also implying I was simply using him for sex. My anger reached a hundred degrees Celsius and boiled over and I slapped him, so hard across the face he was driven back into the compartment door. The satisfied jolt as my hand touched his cheek was ended as soon as he had flung back, leaving only a gnawing guilt.

He charged me, using the weight of his body to knock me to the ground, driving his fists and legs into me, pulling my hair and pinching me. I fought back and we spilled out of the compartment door into the hallway, where our struggles were attracting quite a crowd.

"You’re nothing, Potter." He had thrown away all pretense now. "Nothing but a cheap slut."

He stopped, suddenly becoming aware of the people around him. Both of us stood, him smoothing his hair back and grimacing in distaste at the marks I had caused on his arms.

"Yes, I got to have Harry Potter. He begged me for it." He said, for the convenience of the crowd. My anger spilled over to a simple need for vengeance. I wanted him to suffer, as he had caused me pain. If he wanted to play his little games, I would be the master. One thing he always hated was my superiority over him in so many things.

"No, Malfoy. You don’t get it, do you? I used you."

He laughed, hollowly. I could sense the crowd just looking from one to the other, in the respected silence of a tennis match.

"And I was going to continue to use you. I was trying to spare your feelings, but who cares now? I don’t like you. Here you were, taking me out shopping, taking me this place and that. I did it because I knew if I didn’t, you wouldn’t put out."

"No," I could tell from his voice he wasn’t entirely sure. "You’re the ‘great’ Harry Potter. If you stepped on an ant, you’d mourn for a year."

I steeled myself and caught his eye. "I used you, I’m sorry."

He stormed off, pushing through the crowd angrily. Everyone looked back to him, then stared back at me, the Griffindors in shock, the Slytherins in pure malice. I walked the opposite way from him, trying to ignore the whispered, talked and shouted comments. Ron and Hermione ran up to me and escorted me away, Ron turning a brighter shade of red at the comments now directed at him. One Slytherin pushed his way forward and caught us up just before our compartment.

"You should have been a Slytherin." The blood escaped my body from those words. I felt my hands shake. "You must have put on quite a performance to bag Malfoy." I tried to step past him, not wanting to hear this. He side stepped me and blocked our entrance to the compartment door. "So, tell me, how did you get past the ‘tease’ factor?"

He folded his arms, waiting. Behind us, I could hear two of his friends snickering.

"Just let us in." Ron demanded.

"What do you want?" I asked, exasperated.

"Proof that you’ve relinquished your claim. I don’t share."

"Not with smutty Griffindors." One friend piped up.

I just stared at him, not having a clue what he was talking about. Hermione, as usual, knew exactly what he was getting at.

"Excuse me, but do you view all of your potential partners in such a tactless way?"

The boy turned to her. "Shut up, Granger. This has nothing tot do with you."

It finally dawned on me what he was saying. I felt a rush of anger. "What makes you think he would want you in the first place?"

The boy laughed at my anger. "He will when he sees what I’ve got to offer." He said, lasciviously.

"Leave him alone!"

I pushed him harshly out of the way and stormed into the room, barely allowing Ron and Hermione inside before slamming the door closed so hard, the glass jingled.

"You ok, Harry?" Ron asked. Hermione just looked at me with sympathetic eyes. I wanted to scream them both to shut up, even though they weren’t doing anything wrong. I could not believe the nerve of the boy. What angered me more was the thought that Draco would take him up on his offer just to make me jealous. It seemed like the kind of thing he would do.

I didn’t see Draco at the nine and three quarters platform. I wasn’t sure whether to be relieved or disappointed.

"Come along, boy." Uncle Vernon hissed as I arrived at the muggle platform the other side. I took one more glance around, before solemnly following.

Life in Privet Drive was getting too agonizing to bear. Uncle Vernon had cemented the chimney and front door from the countless letters saluting (and some threatening) me for defeating the Dark Lord Voldermont. This was not without cost, however. Indeed, many great wizards had been lost, the most heart rendering of which being Albus Dumbledore, two years before. My heart still twinged with the faintest pain when I thought of him.

The antagonism mainly came from the fact that Sirius was applying for custody of me. That it would take effect any day from then. It seemed the Dursleys were annoyed their favourite pet was finally being set free. Not once did they ever bring up the case, though it was obvious from their harsher than usual dealings with me that it was in their minds. Indeed, they never asked me about Hogwarts, either. I didn’t want to tell them. I had suffered too much over the past year, and coming home only seemed to relive it all. What could I say?

"Well, Uncle, I watched a great many wizards die, defeated a great dark Lord and still found time to secretly screw my sworn enemy, whose father I saw with my very eyes, use unforgivable curses on wizards."

No, perhaps not.

Twice I had written a letter to him, asking to meet me, before scrunching them up and throwing them in the bin. The third time I actually gave it to Hedwig, before wrestling with her to take it back. I got a nasty bite on the finger for that one.

You’re being stupid! Stupid! I cursed myself. I tried concentrating on his arrogance, his meanness, the fact he adored such an evil man for a father. That would assuage my pain for a while, but then I’d remember something we did together and it would come flooding back. Consolation I found in the letters from Sirius, Ron and Hermione , who assured me that ,yes, there were people who cared. Indeed, Sirius was confident that he would find out soon the positive results of the custody battle.

One day a small white owl flew into the room, circling twice. For a moment, I thought it was pigwidgeon, before I saw the red splotches under its wings. It dropped a starkly white parchment onto my lap, before circling the room once more and flying out the window. Hedwig instantly flew around the room in a mock imitation of the proud bird. I laughed and opened the parchment. Five words, so direct, in his elegant writing.

Meet me at the park.

Twice I turned back, deciding this was foolishness, that I was setting myself up to be hurt once more. But , the thought of at least seeing him again kept me walking. I noticed him before he noticed me. He walked up a muggle see-saw, then gave a gasp of surprise when his weight pushed it down as he reached past the middle. He wore ‘muggle clothes’, or at least tried. I couldn’t help smile a little, at the sight. He seemed to do ok with the bottom half, wearing jeans and sneakers (no socks, I noticed) but the red and white striped tie just didn’t go with the green T-shirt promoting ‘The X-Files’, a muggle TV show. I wondered where the hell he acquired all this from.

I stepped closer and he looked up to me, breaking into a genuine smile.

"Harry!" He stepped up to me, reached up to touch my hair. I grabbed his hand, stopping him.

"Do you know who I saw in the other day?" He said, still not losing his grin. "Severus Snape."

I simply nodded in reply, wondering when he’d get to the point. "I said hello to him. He just said, in this really cold voice ‘Malfoy’ and then left. See, proof, he hates me too!"

I realized he was making a concession to me. I always complained to him that I was sick of being yelled at in Potions class.

"What do you want, Malfoy?"

The smile faded from his face. "Daddy kicked me out."

This was something. I felt my anger drain, replaced by curiosity.

"Why?"

He reached into his pockets and withdrew a familiar piece of parchment. I didn’t need to see what it was, but took it from him anyway. The end of the romantic ramblings was very stupidly written Harry Potter.

"Why did you keep this?" I felt more stupid for myself. He wouldn’t meet my eyes for a moment.

"Look, don’t worry about it. I’m sorry I came."

"Oh, no. You’re not doing this now."

I removed my wand and froze him with the Moroto spell.

"Now we can talk."

"What are you doing? Release me right now!" Even in his frozen state, his eyes were blazing.

"Now, tell me what happened?"

"Do I have to spell it out? Are you that dumb? Lucius found the note and kicked me out. He says he can’t have a gay son." He added, miserably.

I was confused. "But, I thought it was only in muggle world that gays are prejudiced against. In "History of-"

"I know, I took the course too, remember?" He snapped. "Daddy wants a pureblood heir."

"Why did you come to me?" I asked.

"Who else could I go to?" He sounded genuinely confused.

"Crabbe, Goyle, any of your other Slytherin cronies."

He burst out laughing. "As if they’d know what to do."

"As if I would!"

"You’re Harry Potter. You can figure out anything. The great Voldermont destroyer." He half smiled. I suddenly found myself reaching a hand up to touch his face.

"Don’t touch me!" He scolded. We stood in silence a moment.

"I didn’t mean it, what I said on the train. I just wanted to get to you"

He stared at me for a long time. "Yeah, well, nor did I." He looked away. "It’s not as if anything matters anymore."

"He’ll take you back." I reasoned.

"I don’t think so."

"Hold on." I suddenly realized what he had just said. " You’re saying you didn’t want to break up with me?"

"Hmm…" He was obviously distracted. "Can you release the spell now?"

"Are you going to run away? Ok, Disarmen."

His muscles visibly relaxed, yet he still kept the proud stance. I realized how much pride he would have had to shed to arrive here, asking help from his sworn enemy. A memory jolted me; Lucius smiling grimly as the muggle before him jerked in agony from the crucio curse. He had been cleared of all wrong doings of course. For the second time. I never told Draco of his the extent of his father’s involvement in Voldermont’s reign. To protect him, perhaps. Mainly to protect myself. If his reaction was one of complacency at the torture and murder of thousands of muggles and wizards, I would not be able to bear it.

"I miss you." He stepped towards me so he was close but not too near as to be threatening.

Just words, I thought to myself. Does he ever act like he means it? But then he did come here.

"You just want someone to fix your problem." I felt a wave of anger wash through me with those words, realizing it was the truth. Maybe he deserved it, I argued to myself, for the way he’s treated me and Hermione and Ron. So easy just to walk away, to leave him standing there by himself with no idea of how to help himself. After all, wouldn’t he do it to me?

His little finger returned to his teeth. He looked like he was trying to gnaw it off.

"Is it true?" I asked, the anger forcing the words out. "Do you just want me to fix your problem?"

"Damn you, Harry! How dare you think you have a monopoly on my motives! Well, it seems you don’t know me at all!" He seemed to calm down. "How sad!" The smirk returned but it appeared false. Indeed, his eyes emitted a weary sadness.

Damn him! Why was it that everything in my life was so complicated? Why couldn’t I have parents who loved me, like Ron’s? Or a straight-forward career path like Hermione’s? Or a sane, simply loving relationship like the two of them have together?

I was too tired to psycho-analyze myself. I looked into his equally weary face.

You know the reason why you like him so much is because he’s so complicated. You will never peel back all the layers, you realize. They run too deep.

"I will help you. But you have to answer my question."

"Ok."

I steeled myself, heart hammering in my chest. I couldn’t believe I was going to ask this.

You must be insane, truly insane.

"Didyoueverloveme?"

"What? What does that mean? Is it a spell?"

I felt all the blood run to the surface of my skin. I repeated the question, this time slower.

"Oh."

I could see his skin colour equaling mine.

"Did you?" He countered. The two words seemed radically defensive.

"I asked you first."

This was all seeming ridiculous. I was regretting asking.

He couldn’t reach my eyes, finding his boots suddenly very interesting.

"Gees…. Potter… Harry…that’s…"

"I can force you to drink truth serum and find out that way the truth."

He looked horrified. "You are evil."

I stood, waiting. "Why does it matter?" He suddenly snapped. "I would never forgive you if you made me drink that horrible stuff."

I said nothing, simply looked at him. He closed his eyes, seeming to dread saying it as I did hearing it.

"Maybe I do." It came out as an angry challenge of sorts. I felt my heart soar, as though a bird had been released in my soul. I stepped up to him and grabbed his chin softly, angling it up to reach my mouth.

"Harry Potter!"

We broke away, so quickly I nearly stumbled over a twig behind me. I felt my heart plummet as Dudley stepped into the clearing, followed by Uncle Vernon. I thought I had lost them in their zoo visit. I was obviously wrong.

"What are you doing with that other boy?"

Draco could have taken this opportunity to run. To my surprize, he stayed, looking Dudley and Uncle Vernon up and down curiously, not looking the least bit worried. Dudley was looking at Draco in a way that sparked my curiosity. Hmm… wonder if old Vernon ever realized that about his precious boy?

Vernon laughed heartily. "So, my little Harry is also a pansy. I always suspected that of you, my boy. It does, after all, seem to run in the family."

His first reference to Sirius. I felt my hand start to shake in anger.

"A wizard and a pansy. Doesn’t get worse than that. I finally have all the proof I need to lock you up." He said, gleefully.

Dudley had moved over to Draco and was studying him.

"Boy you are disgusting. Ever heard of a diet?"

Vernon turned his piggy eyes to Draco, who smiled at him. "Looks like you could do some weight loss, too. Tell me, how did you get here, by crane?"

I burst out laughing, enjoying this immensely.

"How much does he pay you, boy?" Uncle Vernon asked Draco.

This made me laugh even louder. Obviously, in his eyes, I couldn’t get a lover on my own credence. Dudley reached over to touch his hair. Draco grabbed his arm.

"Hey, hands off, fatboy."

"Dudley!" Uncle Vernon looked horrified. "What are you doing? What spell have you put on him?" He turned on me, towering over me menacingly.

Dudley burst out crying. "Daddy, can’t I?" He choked, lines of snot running down his nose.

"Potter!" Vernon grabbed my arm, pulling me forward to shake me.

"I said hands off, you disgusting muggle!"

Draco angled to the left and used his weight to fling Dudley off him, after my cousin pounced. I was surprized. He was a couple of inches shorter than me and when Dudley and I ‘play fought’ (or rather when Dudley wanted an excuse to beat me up) I could never throw him off. Yet Draco seemed to do it with remarkable ease. Without a word he withdrew his wand and held it at Uncle Vernon.

"Rodantum!"

Dudley squawked in fear and started to run as his father was turned into a small rodent. Draco turned to Dudley and said the words. Instantly he was turned to a much fatter rat. Draco then lifted his foot.

"No!" I pushed him away. Dudley mouse squeaked loudly then ran away, following his father.

Draco looked confused. "I thought you hated them. That boy in particular was the vilest creature I have ever seen. Now can you see why I don’t like muggles?"

"They’re not all like that." I informed him. "Come on. We can’t leave them like that. Let’s find them."

Draco’s lips suddenly curled up into a stubborn expression I knew well. "But they could be anywhere!"

"The size of my cousin, I don’t think so."

"Disgusting, really disgusting." He muttered as we began to search the park.

"Can I ask you something?" I asked as we looked among the bushes at the outskirts before the main road.

"Did that Slytherin boy say anything to you?"

Draco was frowning at a splurge of mud that had splashed up onto his jean cuffs. "Slytherin boys say things to me all the time, Harry. I wish you’d be more narrow."

"After we had that screaming match on the train, this guy came up to me and said he was gonna, you know, have a go for you."

"I think I see him! No, not fat enough." He began kicking up leaves. "Yeah, some guy came up to me and I… " He stopped, looked intently forward, then continued. "I told him if he was the last person left alive I’d turn to bestiality. He was most dis- I knew it was them!"

He suddenly ran forward and pounced into a bush, grabbing his wand out of his jeans pocket.

"Rodantus Ceasus! Rodantus Ceasus!"

Uncle Vernon and Dudley returned, Dudley cowering behind his father, who was looking at Draco with a mixture of humiliation, anger and pure malice. Indeed, it was a similar look to the one Draco gave Mooney three years before after he had enacted a similar spell on him. Dudley simply looked petrified.

"You’re in a lot of trouble, Harry!" Uncle Vernon was returning to his usual angry red colour.

"Oh, shut up!" I’d had enough. Uncle Vernon’s pupils seemed to suddenly dilate in anger, a pulse throbbing in his forehead.

Dudley started to cry again. "Daddy, I thought I was going to die!"

He sobbed harder.

"Now look what you’ve done!" He suddenly advanced upon Draco. "Now, apologize to my son!"

"Me apologize to him?" Draco scoffed. "He should apologize to me!"

"You attacked him for no reason!"

Draco shot me an utterly bewildered and amused, look. His lips were also tensing in a way that I knew anger was thrown into the mix too. Uncle Vernon went veritably purple at Draco’s next words.

"Your son has no control. The porker jumped me. I’m very lucky my obituary doesn’t read ‘Squashed by Unevolved Land Whale’. Worse than that, the sick bastard had the audacity to kiss my ear. Eeeww!" He rubbed at the offended body part. I looked at Dudley in shock. I hadn’t seen that. Dudley’s embarrassed reaction verified its truthfulness.

"Nonsense. My son wouldn’t-"

"Your son is a disgusting pig who deserves to be locked up. And you should join the cell next to him."

Uncle Vernon reached for him with his grimy hands. I withdrew my wand from the sleeve of my coat. Dudley moaned and sobbed louder. Uncle Vernon turned to look at me, squealed and jumped back.

"Now, what is this?"

The voice was familiar. I turned to happily see Remus Lupin stepping into the clearing.

"Great! Now all the fags have come out."

"Petrificus totalus!" Uncle Vernon instantly keeled over, frozen on the spot. Lupin turned his wand to Dudley, who was trying to slink away.

"Petrificus totalus!"

Dudley landed on top of his own father. Even in his frozen state, I could see Uncle Vernon grimace.

"Remus!" I jumped gratefully into his arms, for a back slapping hug. Draco stood back, looking awkward. "What are you doing here?"

"To tell you the good news. Only you weren’t at the house. Your Aunt said you’d gone to the zoo. Strange woman…" He shook his head. "Well, when you weren’t at the zoo, I tried here."

"Is Sirius about?"

The man walked with a stealth that was somewhat graceful, yet not effeminate. He stepped out of the trees to the right and smiled at me. He was looking healthier than I had ever seen him.

"Sirius."

I walked over to be likewise engulfed in his arms. Draco looked as though he wanted to fold right into the oak he now stood against.

"I think you’ll be calling me father, now."

I felt a cold weight lift from my heart. "You can’t be saying-"

"I saw the Ministry for Wizard Protection today. Sorry, champ, you’ve officially got to live with me until you’re twenty-one."

This was. This was…

I should have been happy, thrilled, in fact. All I knew was my own shock.

Soon, I’ll be jumping around the park. I thought to myself.

"I expected a different reaction." Sirius confessed to Remus.

"He’s in shock. Leave him be."

I hated the fact they were talking about me as if I wasn’t there. Just because I was in such shock I couldn’t close my gaped mouth for a few seconds didn’t mean my eardrums had forgotten how to beat.

"The officials are in your house right now working out the details. Oh, and, I hope you don’t mind. Ron and Hermione said they’d help you pack. Oh, and I have to give you this." He handed me a white piece of parchment. Remus and him exchanged a glance. I took it with shaking hands.

"It basically is an apology for taking so long. And for having to endure living with those muggles for so many years."

"Bastards!" Sirius walked up to the frozen Uncle Vernon and spat on him. "I swear, Harry…" He trailed off. He turned and looked at Draco, as though noticing him for the first time. Draco stared back, chin raised in an absurdly defensive way.

"What’s going on here?"

Remus smiled at me in a way that made me realize that he had been aware of Draco standing there the entire time.

I suddenly felt very flustered. Where the hell to begin? It had been bad enough telling Ron but now…

"It’s… well, it’s complicated."

"You’re Lucius Malfoy’s son!" Sirius exclaimed. He suddenly turned to me, dark eyes blazing. "This has to do with the trial, hasn’t it?"

Remus looked as though he was catching on. He appraised Draco. "You’re going to give evidence against your father?"

Draco looked as though he couldn’t contain his shock. "Daddy was cleared of all wrong doing-"

Sirius scoffed at him. I just stared blankly at Sirius and Remus. This was news to me. "There was one witness he couldn’t silence."

"None other than our dear friend Ludo Bagman."

Something changed in Draco’s face, then. A strange certainty washed over it. He suddenly turned and ran.

I cursed and, without a word for Sirius or Remus, apparated straight in front of him, in the middle of the road a few houses from my own.

"Leave me alone, Harry."

That was it. I had finally had enough. If he wanted to fight his own battles, so be it. I simply turned and began to walk up the street.

"I didn’t think he could do it."

He sounded so broken. I unwillingly stepped back towards him.

"I thought you wouldn’t care. After all, they were only muggles, or mudbloods." I said, suddenly, bitterly, then instantly regretted it. For once, there was no arrogance or spite in his face. There was only simple pain. But this only lasted a moment, before the mask came over his face once more, the familiar smirk returned. That was it. I couldn’t do this any more. I turned to walk away once more.

"I don’t know what you want!" Exasperation and frustration was evident in his voice. "Harry, this is the best-"

I faced him, deciding, in that moment, that I could see him for what he truly was. Nothing to me. Not even worth the seven year prolonged argument. I felt a strange calm at the thought of him no longer having any effect on me. The fact that we had admitted to being in love before did not seem to matter in that instance. I could only see Lucius’ smiling face, so similar to his son’s.

"I pity you, Malfoy. Your best is any one else’s worst. And that includes muggles and ‘mudbloods’"

Once again, his face convoluted with emotions, the mask dropped. He seemed unable to replace it. No, he hadn’t dropped it, I had cut straight through it, shredded it to pieces. I was now looking at the raw, bloody underside.

His voice shook as he spoke. "Why do you always judge me, Harry? I feel like everyday, everybody’s always judging me. And I’m sick of it! Why can’t anything I do ever be good enough? I try so hard to make you proud, to make Lucius proud. But I’m always not saying the right thing or doing things the way I should. I can’t do this anymore!"

Frustrated tears splashed down his cheeks. He bought his hand to his face and caught a drop on his finger, staring at the salt water a moment.

"And now, I’ve failed again."

He apparated, disappearing on the spot. As he left, Sirius and Remus apparated beside me.

"Harry, you have some explaining to do." Sirius remarked.

I looked up the road, as though expecting to see Draco reappear on the rough gravel, feeling a numb confusion.

What just happened?

"Yes, Sirius. I guess I do."

TBC