"You know, I've never been kissed properly."
Remus's eyes flick up from his paper and regard the boy sitting across the
table from him. "Oh?" His voice belies no emotion and Remus imagines
having the same response whether Harry told him Hedwig consumed an ungodly
amount of owl treats or that he spends most evenings pimping out his friends.
"Yeah. Cho Chang kissed me once in fifth year, but I mostly stood there
and did nothing other than make a complete fool of myself. Hermione's kissed me
on the cheeks a couple of times, but that doesn't count."
Remus thinks Harry looks younger than he has in months. They've been at war
for nearly two years and even seventeen-year-olds begin showing signs of aging
under that kind of duress. Most days, Harry is withdrawn and sullen, retreating
to his room after dully reporting the day's campaigns. If he's gone for a few
days, he goes beyond sullen and barrels head-on to completely unresponsive,
limply letting Madam Pomfrey tend to his injuries, while Molly flaps about and
frets. Now, though, with one hand propping up his cheek, his face screwed up in
concentration, he resembles a teenager. Harry is, of course, but Remus sometimes
forgets that. "Ah," Remus replies.
"What was your first kiss like?" Harry idly chews on the crust of
his toast.
Remus stiffens a bit, but resolves himself to answering Harry's question. He
feels he owes it to Harry, but he's not sure why. Maybe for James or Sirius or
because he should reward Harry for acting "normal" or because Remus is
shit as a father-figure. "It was...well, it was strange. I think I was
fourteen. I didn't know where to put my hands and my mouth wouldn't cooperate.
He told some people I was a terrible kisser, thus ensuring my celibacy for the
rest of the year."
Harry laughs, then sits straight up. "You said 'he'!"
"I did."
Harry settles back again, a contemplative look on his face. "Yeah, I'm
not that surprised."
Remus wishes he hadn't chosen that exact moment to sip his tea. Choking, he
says, "You're not?"
"Well, after Si-Sirius" -- the name is still difficult after all
this time -- "died, I remembered you two living here...together...and I
thought maybe you and he had...." Harry's blushing furiously as he intently
studies an invisible spot on the tablecloth.
"Oh. I see. No, Sirius was my friend and that's all. He and I were
never...involved." Remus doesn't want to tell Sirius's godson that after
Azkaban there was no way Sirius could have handled a proper relationship. Trying
to lighten the mood, he says, "He did have a rather nice arse,
though." Harry gives a strangled half-laugh.
The two sit in silence for a moment. Then, Harry blurts, "Would you
kiss me?"
Remus resolves to never take another sip of tea when Harry's in the room.
Coughing violently, he splutters, "What?"
Harry's cheeks are now so red they're practically glowing. "I just think
I'm too old to have never had a proper snog and you're here and we're
alone..." He trails off, glancing up hopefully.
Remus pushes away a fleeting thought about Harry's eyes. "I'm sure there
are plenty of girls your age who'd kiss you," he says kindly.
Harry's look is intent and fiery, his mouth pressed into a straight line.
"You're not a girl, Remus."
"Ah."
Harry stands, pushing the chair back violently as he goes, and makes his way
around the table. Then, Harry's in the seat next to him and his knees are
pressing against the outside of Remus's thigh and his mouth so near Remus's
cheek that he can feel hot air tracing patterns on his skin. Slowly, Remus turns
towards Harry, their faces millimetres apart. "All right, Harry. Only if
you're really certain."
Shock floods Harry's face, possibly due to the sheer novelty of getting what
he wants. The intensity and anger of a moment ago drains away, leaving only a
hesitant nod.
Remus wets his lips slightly, nearly laughing at the ridiculousness of
teaching someone to kiss when it's been eons since he's been thoroughly kissed
himself. "Tilt your head," he whispers and Harry complies, eyes wide.
Remus wonders if Harry'll keep his eyes open throughout as he leans in and
softly presses his lips to Harry's. His question is answered when Harry makes a
tiny noise and his eyes flutter shut.
Harry's lips are chapped and he hasn't shaved today. Remus slides his lips
across the dry, raised skin as a curl of warmth forms in his belly, causing his
own eyes to close. Tentatively, he brings a hand up to Harry's face, relishing
the feel as Harry leans into the touch. Brushing his thumb along Harry's jawline,
Remus nibbles on Harry's lower lip, then coaxes Harry's mouth open with his
tongue. It seems as though kissing is rather like riding a bicycle. Everything
Remus has ever learned about teasing with his mouth comes back to him as the
warmth in his stomach travels a bit lower.
Remus's tongue touches Harry's, who gasps and makes another small moan.
Harry, unsure of himself, quickly darts his tongue in and out of Remus's mouth
causing Remus to deliberately slow his movement. He circles his tongue around
Harry's, then sucks lightly. A few crumbs of toast make their way from Harry's
mouth into Remus's, combining with the lingering, sweet taste of tea. Harry,
whose actions slow as he catches on to Remus's gentle pace, massages Remus's
tongue with his own. Harry's hands start a slow ascent from Remus's wrists to
his upper arms to his neck, finally raking his fingers through Remus's hair. A
moan is heard and Remus, startled, realises it came from him. Harry moans in
reply, the sound vibrating against the inside of Remus's mouth.
Aroused more than any Englishman should be at eight in the morning, Remus
imagines pulling Harry by the shirt and throwing him over the breakfast table so
he can better have his way with him. His eyes fly open at the thought and he
breaks the kiss, pulling away so his and Harry's hands fall away.
Breathing heavily, Harry stares at Remus, lifting his hand to touch his own
mouth. His lids are heavy, his cheeks and lips a matching shade of red. Remus
has to look away, shifting uncomfortably in his chair. He clears his throat.
"Harry --"
Harry immediately interrupts, his voice soft. "That...that was
brilliant. Thank you." His hand is still near his mouth.
Remus doesn't answer for a moment, choosing instead to get very interested in
his tea again. Finally, he settles on "You're welcome." It's good that
he's able to be a help to James's son and it's not like he expects anything else
to....
A hand settles on Remus's shoulder and he makes a concerted effort not to
press into the touch. Harry's voice is still small, hesitant. "Can we do
this again sometime?"