You Can Call Me Al *The video for this song is hilarious!!

A man walks down the street He says, Why am I soft in the middle now? Why am I soft in the middle? The rest of my life is so hard! I need a photo-opportunity, I want a shot at redemption! Don't want to end up a cartoon, In a cartoon graveyard... Bonedigger, bonedigger, Dogs in the moonlight Far away, my well-lit dorr Mr. Beerbelly, beerbelly, Get these mutts away from me! You know, I don't find this stuff amusing anymore Chorus: If you'll be my bodyguard, I can be your long lost pal I can call you Betty, And Betty, when you call me, You can call me Al! A man walks down the street He says, Why am I short of attention? Got a short little span of attention, And whoa, my nights are so long! Where's my wife and family? What if I die here? Who'll be my role-model? Now that my role model is... Gone...gone He ducked back down the alley With some roly-poly, little bat-faced girl All along...along... There were incidents and accidents, There were hints and allegations... Chorus Call me Al... A man walks down the street It's a street in a strange world Maybe it's the Third World Maybe it's his first time around He doesn't speak the language He holds no currency He is a foreign man He is surrounded by the sound, sound... Cattle in the marketplace Scatterlings and orphanages He looks around, around... He sees angels in the architecture Spinning in infinity He says, Amen! and Hallelujah! Chorus You can call me Al...