It had been weeks since Jenna left, yet AJ still hadn't talked to her, even though every day that's all that went through his mind. He just went through the motions of his life, sinking back into work and ignoring everyone and everything around him. He couldn't believe how hard it was to shake himself of her, she was like his own personal heroine addiction, and there wasn't enough methadone in the world to kick it.
He had contemplated calling her, he'd even toyed with the idea of going to visit her, but he hadn't done either. He still clung to the hope that she'd call him first. That she would realize what she lost and try as desperately to get him back as he had pursued her. But, with each passing minute of each passing day he knew that was more and more unlikely to happen. He didn't talk to anyone unless he was working, he didn't go out, he didn't do much of anything at all but sit in his house and dwell on what had become of his life.
You have to move on with your life! His mind screamed at him, pushing him to do something, call someone, go somewhere, to just start living a real life again. He knew he had to, but wanting to was an entirely different thing.
Finally his voice of reason won out, and he reached over to grab the telephone, dialing her number and wondering what he'd say. It had been a long time since they'd talked.
"Could I speak to Kayla please."
"Where the hell have you been?" A woman yelled back.
"What are you talking about?" He said. "Kayla? Is that you?"
"Yes it's me. You don't even recognize my voice anymore!" She spat with a bitter tone.
"Not when you're screaming!" He yelled back.
"I haven't talked to you in weeks." She said, her voice a little quieter. "You aren't returning my calls, you've missed our nights out. What's going on?"
"I've had company, and well my mind's been on a lot of things, I'm sorry."
"Is everything okay?" She asked, hearing the despondent tone in his voice.
"Not particularly, but I don't really want to talk about it. So how was the last night out?" He asked, he'd totally forgotten about it.
"AJ don't change the subject, what's the matter?"
"Please, let me get away with changing the subject just once!" AJ begged. "Please."
"Okay." She conceded.
"So, tell me. How was karaoke night? I totally forgot about it."
"It was fun, Jesse finally sang that Ozzy song. He was wicked."
"Oh, I wish I could have seen that!" He smiled. They had been trying to get him up on that stage for over a year. "So what did you sing?"
"I didn't. I got the DD card, and you know how embarrassed I get when I haven't drunk a little courage. Nick kept me company though." She said, AJ's ears perking up at the mention of a name.
"Nick, as in Nick, your boss?"
"Yeah."
"Nick went
out with you on our karaoke night?" He asked, jealousy bubbling inside
him that she'd even contemplate
taking him out to do "their"
thing.
"So what?" She said.
"Are you dating now?" He asked, the fury building inside him
"Who?"
"You and Nick."
"God no."
"So what did you do?"
"I dunno, drank, talked, danced." She rattled off.
"That's a date Kay."
"Get over it AJ, I'm not dating Nick. He's my boss for christ's sake." She said, her voice getting loud and angry again.
"Well do you at least have anything to tell me about what he's been up to, ya know aside from going out with you?"
"Like what?" She said cynically.
"Like the reason I got you this job Kayla. You're supposed to be watching him, not going out dancing with him!"
"Look, I'm
not going to be your spy AJ. I took this job because I needed it and it
was better than some stuffy desk job,
that's all."
"Kay, I asked you to take the job to watch Nick for me."
"As far as I know Nick is okay, he isn't shooting crack or getting blow jobs from transvestites, but if he doesn't want you to know things about him or his life, it's none of my business to tell you."
"Make it your business Kayla."
"Don't get pissed off at me. I know you're worried about him, but there's nothing you or anyone can do."
"You could tell me what's going on with him Kayla. I know you know more than you're telling me."
"I might be your friend, but dammit AJ I'm his too, what he says to me is between us."
"You are getting involved with him aren't you?"
"No. Why would you ask me that?"
"I hear it in your voice."
"You don't hear anything in my voice."
"Yes I do, you're defending him like he's your boyfriend or something. Kayla I don't care if you never listen to anything I say except this. Don't get involved with him, he's royally screwed up."
"More than you are?"
"Yes. Kayla." He said without a hint of humor in his voice. "I mean it. You'll only get hurt, I know what that kid is capable of."
"Jesus AJ you make it sound like he's a serial killer."
"Some things are worse than murder Kayla. Promise me you won't go down that road."
"I never
said I was. You were the one that jumped to the assumption that I was getting
involved with him. Well I'm not, so
don't worry about it."
"Promise me Kay!"
"Bye AJ." She said with mock sweetness, hanging up on him. He slammed the phone down hard on the receiver. He couldn't believe her. He couldn't believe Nick. What in the hell had he gotten her into?
AJ slumped back down into the chair that had occupied his body for most of the day. He'd lost Jenna to Nick, and now it seemed like he was about to lose Kayla to him as well.
Or am I just crazy and paranoid? He thought to himself. He get up from his chair and decided to go out and do something, he was sick of his house and everything in it. I need a life, he thought. Desperately.
AJ sat quietly, trying to listen to the plans for the upcoming press junket. He was looking forward to being away from things for a couple of months.
He'd given up on Jenna, he hadn't heard a word from her, and now Kayla wasn't talking to him either. It had been weeks since they last spoken and he was so worried that she was getting herself involved in something she wouldn't be able to get out of. Namely Nick. If she was even involved with him at all. He didn't know. As much as he'd tried to get the information out of Nick, he was his usual aloof self, and wouldn't even give a hint as to what was going on in his life; love or otherwise.
Maybe while we're away on this trip I can get it out of him, AJ thought as their meeting took a break, actually wanting to spend time with Nick, just so he could figure out what was going on. He got up from the table, moving to the other side of the room and sprawling himself out on a couch. He turned on the television and scanned through the channels until he found something he liked, settling on 'Days of our Lives'.
"So what's up with all that Hope and Gina stuff?" Brian asked as he sat down next to him, handing him a can of coke.
"I don't know, probably the same thing that was happening last time you watched it." He sighed, as the both immersed themselves in the show. As hard as it was.
"Are you bringing someone with you this time?" Brian asked, neither of them able to pay much attention to the idiotic scenes that played before them on the television.
"I don't know. I might bring Elisa." AJ responded,
"Which one is Elisa?"
"Ya know, really hot, reddish brown hair, cut kind of choppy to her shoulders. Um, really sweet, but to look at her you'd think she wasn't. Remember, I met her a couple of months ago?"
"Oh, at the thing, when we had to go for the stuff?"
"Exactly." AJ said.
"Really? Have you been seeing her since then?"
"On and off. But I've been spending a lot of time with her lately." Aj sighed. "I don't know if she'd come with us though. It's kind of a long time to be away from home when you aren't used to it."
"So, just get her to come for a little bit." Brian rationalized. "You know how boring it gets if you don't have at least one person around."
"Yeah I know, but we'll see. I still have a week to decide." AJ turned back towards the television, wondering if he should bring Elisa with him or not. He knew she'd say yes if he asked her to come with him, it was just a matter of figuring out if he really wanted her there. Aj decided he'd figure it out tonight when she came over to his house. He liked her a lot, it was just hard to get over someone he'd spent so many years being obsessed with. Jumping into a relationship with someone so soon wouldn't be good for either of them. He didn't know if a real relationship with Elisa was possible, or if she was just the rebound girl he was spending time with to help move on with his life. All he did know for sure, was that for right now at least, Elisa was perfect. She didn't ask too much from him, and he really liked to be with her. She made him smile, and that in itself these days was a miracle.
"No! You know I gave that up!"
AJ turned back towards the table where Nick and Howie sat, startled by Nick's yelling. Brian turned momentarily to see what the commotion was, but turned back to the television almost immediately. Brian may have been more intrigued by the incessant displays of affection between John and Marlena on the screen, but AJ was much more interested in the conversation going on behind him, and why Nick seemed so irritated. He strained to hear what they were saying over the noise on the television, and he missed most of what they were talking about, but he was hearing enough.
"I didn't ask who brought it on, I asked what. Who is it?"
"No one."
"Were you with no one last night when we tried to call you? We called your cell phone about a hundred times?"
"Why'd you call?"
"To remind you about this meeting. You were bowling?"
"Kayla reminded me, and yes I was bowling."
"Is she no one?"
"No, she's someone."
"What kind of someone?" Howie asked him, AJ's heart pounding like a jackhammer.
"Howie, screw off man. I don't want to talk about it!" Nick said, his voice getting so low AJ found it hard to hear anything at all.
"Just tell me if you're seeing her. That's all I want to know." He pressed. AJ made a mental note to thank Howie.
"Okay." Nick sighed. "I'm seeing her, she's seeing me, we're seeing each other. Now please, drop it."
AJ's heart stopped beating over Nick's blunt words to Howie. His worst nightmare had just been verified.
"So," He began. "We're doing this press junket soon, and I'll be gone for a month or so."
"A month of press?" She exclaimed wide-eyed. "How boring is that?"
"Very. Which is why I'm wondering if you'd like to come for a little while."
"Really?" Elisa replied, seemingly in disbelief that he'd ask.
"Yeah really. It just gets really boring, and well you're the only person I really like to be around, so I'd love it if you came. Even if you can only get away for a little while."
AJ watched her ponder it over in her mind.
"Where are you going?"
"Um, I know we do a few US cities, then we're in Canada for awhile, then we head over to Europe, Australia, Asia, then south America. I think."
"And when are you going?"
"We leave in a few weeks."
Elisa let out a big sigh. "I guess I can go for a little while. But not for the whole thing, I can't be gone that long."
AJ smiled. "Good. Now let's go watch some movies." He took her by the hand and led her into the next room. The moment he had picked Elisa up, he knew he wanted her to come with him. Especially after the blow he had been dealt at the meeting. He just needed to be with someone who was there solely to be with him. Someone who he could spend time with that wouldn't remind him of the total and utter turmoil he'd let his life spiral into.
He sat down next to her on the couch, staring blankly into space. He couldn't stop thinking about it. About Nick and Kayla and how he'd managed to steal someone else from him. He worried about bringing Elisa on the trip. What if she hung out with Nick and suddenly fell for him as well?
"What's wrong?" Elisa asked. "Starting to regret inviting me on that trip already?"
He looked at her with an annoyed glare. "Of course not, I'm glad you're coming with me, there's nothing wrong." He mumbled. What he was really thinking about was how much he wanted to talk to Kayla. How much he wanted to ask her why she didn't tell him herself, although he already knew the answer to that one. How did I let this get so out of control? He wondered to himself. I have to talk to her.
"So which movie do you want to watch first?" She asked, not pressing about why he was so obviously upset. Another reason he liked her so much. "Or are we just going to stare at the blank tv screen all night?"
"I don't really care which one. You pick, and I'll go make some popcorn for us." He said, starting to get up.
"No, you always burn it." She laughed. "I'll make the popcorn, you pick the movie."
"Okay." He agreed. AJ scrambled for the phone the minute Elisa left the room. He needed to talk to Kayla, to warn her or stop her, to do anything or say anything that would stop this from going any further. His foot tapped impatiently on the floor as it rang, his blood pressure no doubt rising to an unhealthy level. Finally her answering machine clicked on and he didn't know whether he should leave a message or just hang up. As the tone sounded he started in on her, like he were talking to a real person and not a machine.
"Kayla I asked you to promise me that you wouldn't get involved with him, you don't know what you're doing and when things go bad don't come running to me with your broken heart in your hands because I don't want to help you. God dammit Kayla, all I asked is that you watch out for him, you weren't supposed to start dating the guy. You don't know what he can do, you don't know what he's capable of and I really hoped you wouldn't find out. If you're smart you'll end this before it goes too far, before he does to you what he did to...."
AJ quickly hung the phone up when he saw Elisa emerge from the kitchen. His heart raced a mile a minute with adrenaline. He couldn't believe he was just on the verge of telling Kayla everything, all about Jenna, and Christine, and everything else that had gone on. He just didn't know what else to do, he didn't want Kayla to get hurt.
"Who was on the phone?" Elisa asked as she sat down next to him, handing him the big bowl of popcorn she had gone off to make.
"No one, I was just checking my messages. Ready to watch the movie?"
"Of course." She smiled obliviously, curling up next to him on the couch as he shut the light off next to him, pressing play on the remote. He tried not to let her get close to him, for fear she'd be able to feel his hands shake or how fast his pulse was racing.
He was scared. He was fully aware of the person he had turned Nick into. The cheating, lying, drinking, drug doing, self-destructive and uncaring man that had repeatedly hurt everyone in his path, especially the women he'd come into contact with. He never intended to get Kayla hurt, he never intended for anyone to get hurt, but now the inevitable was going to happen. Kayla was going to be crushed by the ball he set in motion so long ago, and he only hoped he could do something to stop it.