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When Roses Grow Black Chapter 29 As I opened my eyes, I was dimly aware of someone laying under me. I moaned as my muscles protested moving, and kept me where I was. Fear and panic swept through me as I remembered what happened. The only logical explanation was that the bus was run off the road. "Is anyone else up??" I called loudly. "I am," came a muffled reply. "Where are you?" I called out again. The voice sounded close, yet I couldn't see anyone. "Underneath you." "Oh! Sorry," I murmered as I rolled off of the poor person I had crushed in the commotion. In my mind the order 'smart-ass' kept bouncing around. But, I figured I wouldn't be too happy if I woke up to someone on top of me. Slowly, but surely, AJ's skinny form emerged from the pile of things I had landed on. He looked around and rubbed his eyes as they became used to the light again. I couldn't help but wonder where the hell Kevin had landed. I really couldn't believe my luck today. It seemed my days just kept getting worse and worse as the hours went on. I rubbed my bandaged wrist trying to make it stop hurting. If any of my close friends saw me they would have thought I had attempted suicide, again. That thought caused a smirk appear on my face which didn't go unnoticed by AJ. "What's da smirk for?" he asked as he began unburying the lower half of his body. For a tour bus it sure could hold a lot of useless junk in it. Among the things he threw off him were video games, magazines, pillows, blankets, papers, art supplies, beanie babies, stuffed animals, and a couple of vitamin bags. "Nothing really," I answered while looking at my wrist, "just that if any of my friends saw me right now they would think I tried to commit suicide. When, in fact, it couldn't be further from the truth." "Why would they think that? Did you try suicide before??" he asked once he was completely uncovered and standing. "Yeah, I did," I confessed uneasily. I didn't like where this was going. I don't think any body would have in my position. I didn't want to give away I was a fan because I didn't want them to see me like that. I also didn't want them to see me as a person they had to be sure wouldn't hurt themselves. I was over the whole suicide thing a long time ago. It was done, in the past. "What stopped you?" he asked curiously. "I really dont want to talk about it right now, okay? Just know that it is in the past now," I asked, my eyes pleading for him to drop the subject. "Alright, but you know you can come to any of us with anything, alright?" he asked. "But-" He cut me off before I continued. He already knew what I was going to say, "I know we havn't known eachother for that long. But if we're right, then, in another life, we were brother and sister. I don't know about you, but I feel as if I can put my life in your hands. I certainly hope you can put yours in mine. I feel this bond with you. I dont even feel this with my mother. And she means the world to me. I don't know whyI feel this way but I do. Just know you can come to me, at least." "Okay, I'll keep that in mind," I promised as he gave me a hand and helped me up. I quickly glanced at the mess around me and sighed. It reminded me of my room back home. That was when I knew I was getting homesick. I was really beginnning to miss everything and everyone. Well, not everything, but a lot. I heard a low moan to my right and quickly faced that way. Sure enough, there was Kevin just coming around. AJ took two big steps over the junk and kneeled down next to Kevin, who was rubbing his head. "What happened?" Kevin asked slowly as he stood up. "Wish we had an answer for ya, Train." AJ sighed as he forced the door to the room open. Nick stood in between the bunks in the hallway space with his back to us. From his posture I guessed that he was either really disoriented or really confused. "Hey, you alright, little man??" Kevin asked as he came up behind Nick putting a hand on his shoulder. Nick jumped and turned around looking confused. His intitial shock and confusion turned to embarrassment as his face reddened. "You okay, man?" Kevin tried again. "I think I fell out of my bunk," Nick said quietly as he scratched the back of his head. Kevin, AJ and I started cracking up laughing at this. He must have just woken up because he had no clue what happened. He couldn't even figure out why he had fallen out of his bunk! "Nick, don't worry, it's not your fault," I said through my laughter. "What happened then?" Nick asked, still disoriented. "Well, if you could get out of the way, we could find that out," Kevin stated squeezing past Nick and making his way through the now messy tour bus. I looked around me and smiled faintly. There was stuff every where, on the floor, on the furniture. It almost looked like we had tipped upside down in the crash. I looked quickly at Nick standing in front of me in just a pair of jeans. His left arm was still in the sling and his shoulder needed new dressings. I frowned as I noticed the dark red liquid seeping through the pure white bandaging. He seemed to still be waking up as he stood rubbing his eyes and yawning. I stood there dumbly, not knowing what to do. I used to hate it when I was around my Dad and this happened because he was the only one who would ever notice it. He would say : "You all right? You look as if you were lost." I hated it because I never knew what to say. "Hey, Rose, you okay?" I heard Brian ask and I jumped back in to reality. Brian was sitting on the bunk in front of me snapping in front of my face. "Hellooo...anybody home??" he asked again. "Huh? What?" I asked dazed. Brian began laughing in my face and I gave him my best "are you crazy" look. That only made him laugh harder. "What's so funny??" I asked sounding angry, but on the inside I knew I was only joking. "Hey, AJ,"he called as AJ worked his way back to us through the front. "What's up, Rok?" AJ called back. "We've got another Nick on our hands here!" Brian answered. "Oh, Jeez, another space case?? Don't tell me she's a video game fanatic, too." AJ threw a side-ways smirk at me and I almost started laughing. Little did he know that I was a video game fanatic. I had been playing video games all my life. Between me and my brother, we had every single video game system ever made. Unfortunately, I was the owner of all the systems that bombed. I've always had bad luck with everything. "Um...I plead the fifth," I said shyly and quickly walked by AJ and into the frontof the bus. Behind me I heard their shocked voices exclaim "Oh My God!!" as the realization dawned on them. I plopped myself down in a seat in the kitchen of the bus, ignoring all thejunk I was sitting on. I sat hunched over and sighed deeply. This was not how I had imagined my week to be like. Then again, what had I imagined my week to be like?? I had no clue asto what I should have expected. I mean, com'on! I ran away, did I think it was goingto be calm and peaceful. 'Nice blonde moment, Rose.' I repremanded myself. "You wanna go home, don't you?" a soothing voice came from beside me and I felt a comforting hand begin to rub my back. I held my head in my handsand didn't look up. I knew that if I did my eyes would tell all. "What home?" I asked weakly into my hands. I had never been this homesick in my life. Then, I had never been away from anyone I knew for more than two days. I wanted to call Krystal. I wanted to see Justin again, I wanted to give my Aunt a hug one last time. I wanted to tell Gerry I was all right, verything would be okay. I wanted to ask Janine to be a bitch to everyone for me while I was gone. I really did want to just go home. But, if I did go back to my home town, would there still be one there for me? Or would it be gone just like everything else? "It's okay you know," Howie chuckled lightly in a sad tone. He was trying to make me feel better, and to believe it or not it was begining to work. "We aren't about to make you into a ward of the state." That one line definitely made me feel better. "Can I tell you something? Something between just you and me?" I asked after a moment of thought. I pulled my head out of my hands and turned towards Howie, who was sitting next to me. "I won't tell a soul," he smiled and I looked around me, wishing I didn't have to look him in the eyes. Not that I was going to say anything bad or I was lying, I just didn'twant him to see the pain in my eyes, the confusion I knew was there. "All I wanted a week ago was to never see any part of my old life again. I packed my bag and left with out telling any one, not even one of my best friends. Then, I knew in my heart that I would probably see them all again, soon. Like I thought I was either going to go back home or I was going to be caught. Then someone at my house would notice I was alive something," I stopped and took a breath. I couldn't find the right words to describe what I was trying to say. Howie continued rubbing my back and waited patiently. Out the window the sun was now low in the sky and the new day was beginning. The birds were singing, and the wind was blowing gently making the leaves of tree russle. It was nice out, not nearly as hot as it would come to be later on in the day as the sun became higher. The aroma of the dew on the green grass tickled at my nose as I thought. I could hear Brian and AJ in the back of the bus attempting to clean everything up. They were joking around and I couldn't help but wonder what they were like when all this weird crap wasn't going on. I smiled faintly at Nick's laughter as Brian joked around. "Now..." I trailed off still in thought. "Now..? Now you don't feel that anymore?" Howie tried to finish my uncompleted sentence for me. I looked down at my hands and said softly, "Yeah. Now,...It's like that part of my life is over. A whole new chapter is beginning. I can never go back." Howie looked at me a second before pulling me into a hug that I had desparatly needed. I was the first to pull back once I recollected my feelings. I knew I could trust Howie, I knew I could. "You're right, you can't go back. No one can ever go back, it just doesn't work like that. But, you have to remember, at the end of the book, in one way or another, the same characters are always there." I let this sink in for a moment and I smiled. "Thank you," I hugged him again before going in search of Kevin. He knew some thing about the past lives, I had to talk to him.Next: Chapter 30 |