ks1p2

Evening
We set the table and then we all have some time to relax. Dad comes home and the girls and I help him do whatever. We eat and I take my vitamin. My sister comes home and we sit around the table and have a family conversation. I check my email again and give the computer up to my sister. I do more laundry. I play some more with my cats and watch some TV or read to my nieces. I sometimes have a snack. Then I go to bed.

The investigator would be bored out of his wits. I’d be the most uninteresting subject in the world. A background check would find that I spent 6 years as a professional Nanny. My former employers will tell him that I was the best childcare provider they’d had and wish I was still working for them. I spent two years in college. I volunteer at my niece’s elementary school. He’d find I have insurance for baby and me. I have tons of mailings from companies that deal with babies. I subscribe to Parent’s magazine. I am close to my family, have wonderful, professional friends and am always around kids. I have no mental illnesses or defects. I have some traffic tickets. He’d also find that I bounced some checks a year ago. That’s probably the most interesting thing he’d find. The only other interesting thing he’d find is that my husband abused me. And that find that I spend a lot of time with the women from my victims of abuse support group to aid me in my recovery.

I’d love my in-laws to hire a private investigator. It’d take a lot of the burden off of me to prove that I am fit. I would have less legal fees to pay. My lawyer wouldn’t have to work so hard. My lawyer and I hope this happens-he’s not worried at all. There’d be more proof that my husband is a liar. Then, perhaps, my in laws and I could amicably work out visitation, which is what I want.

Men who abuse their wives still try after we leave to make life miserable for us. My husband is playing on my biggest fear and that is losing my child. He still seeks to control me by playing on this fear, which is what he accomplished when I was with him.

My husband doesn’t really want custody. He wants control. He hates that I am in control of myself again. He hates that I will be the decision maker in our son’s life. He hates he lost the authority. He wants to show to me he still has power over me by seeking custody. He’s got to know somewhere in that twisted mind of his that this is a futile effort. As long as his parents are backing him up and rooting for him, he’ll feel he has control. I know from experience, it won’t last long. Right now, he’s grasping at straws and trying to punish me. Right now, I’m laying a foundation for the rest of my and my son’s life. That’s my only concern.