Pfaltzgraff

I am Pfaltzgraff.  I am a fighter.  This is the journal of my adventures.


I was sitting in the bar the other day sipping an ale. There were three others with me around the table, whom I'd met on the road back from another village (I was visiting some friends there.) Two were elves, one a wood elf thief and the other a mongrel half-orc. The only reason I was at the same table with him was because there were no other tables. Anyway, the bartender was bringing us brews, and on one of the rounds he told us that some guy up at the Green Eagle was looking for people to find a merchant friend of his, who had apparently been captured by a band of orcs beyond the old moat house. Sounded like none of my business 'till I realized that these guys would probably be offering a reward. The others with me expressed an interest in going, and the foxy cleric that I'd befriended was also considering it, so we all decided to go up there that night and talk to the guy at the Green Eagle. A couple other friends in the bar also wanted to go along. So we waited until happy hour was over, then boogied up to the Green Eagle. On the way we met another elf who was on his way to the same place, so we all trooped up there together.

The guy who lives at the Green Eagle is Coridian Delmont, a magic-user of some type. He told us that we could all split 500 gold pieces if we could bring back some evidence of the merchant's fate, either him alive or dead, or his goods, which were apparently jewelry and gems. Getting better all the time!

So the next morning we took off for the orc cave. These were my travelling companions: the half-elf fighter, the wood elf thief, the half-orc named Tarr, Ham the hobbit thief, and Hercules the human fighter. The guy we met last was a magic-user thief named Tex. And of course the cleric lady.

Soon we got to the cave and battled our way in, killing most of the male orcs (one escaped.) We found a cave full of huts with females and young, and were in the middle of interrogating them as to the whereabouts of the merchant when a bunch of new orcs came in, led by an orc cleric and a human in armor with a glowing sword. That was one tough battle. Turned out the cleric had a wand of wonder and he managed to blind us all for a short time, but I recovered quickly and chased him into a tunnel, putting an arrow in him. He leveled the wand at me and somehow blinded himself. I was laughing so hard seeing him flounder around that I almost missed putting the next arrow through his right eye.

I quickly grabbed the wand, and we all went exploring. The half-orc was tearing away at the human's plate mail, so Ham, Hercules, Tex, and I checked out the place. We found the orc temple and a secret door, killed two zombies, and found some treasure. Us four quickly split the gold we found, as well as the four potions, but we left the silver and electrum in the chest so the others wouldn't suspect. Then we found another chest, but about this time the others showed up. This chest had a couple of magical scrolls in it and a map showing treasure in the middle of the swamp, which I quickly memorized.

But apparently the others suspected us of stealing, for one of the scrolls was a detect magic scroll which the high elf fighter evoked as a spell (a magic-user also!), and probably sensed the magic from the vials on us. However, I had the wand on me so I shouldn't have been too suspect. We also found a magic ring and a bunch of money, but no jewelry. Then we found another door, behind which was the merchant hanging from a wall.

We took him back to town with us, killing a troll along the way. It had a sack, and Tex carried that. We took the merchant to the Green Eagle, and Delmont paid and fed us. But Tex left to take a piss, and didn't come back. So we left, and spied him far ahead of us. We followed, and he circled through town, then headed back towards the orc cave. Then a band of gnomes stopped him, and we caught up. Turns out he was trying to get away with whatever was in the bag. We started quarreling as to who had the treasure map, when I spied the wood elf trying to give it to his pet hawk. After being confronted he gave it up.

By this time the gnomes had split, apparently not anticipating all of us showing up. So we made our way back to the Inn, divided the stuff up, and went to bed. Hercules got the magic sword, Tex got the ring he identified as a "feather faller," the half-orc got the magic shield from the human we killed, the high elf got the magic spear we found, and I quietly claimed the wand. I had also picked up some extra arrows and a halberd. There was also a magical golden guitar the orc cleric had, obviously for use by a bard, but useless to all of us. Hercules tried playing it, but all that happened was that he glowed purple for a time, and he really couldn't play well. So that we decided to sell. That being done, we retired for the night.


Today I traded in my scale mail and short bow for splint mail and a long bow. I also bought a horse and a 2-handed sword. Amazingly, I had money left over. It's nice being rich. Almost a hundred gold pieces left over.

The only one I saw this morning was Ham. Another fighter-type and a strange-looking thief had joined us for lunch. The fighter's name was Din-Garch, and the other was called LiChin. Anyway, some one came in complaining about more orcs down the east road. I was eager to try out my new blade, so Ham, myself, and the other two set off. They didn't have horses, so we walked. After about an hour a bunch of orcs jumped us on the road. We managed to kill them, but they nailed LiChin good and we barely got him patched up. Guy had no business fighting without armor anyway, and with only daggers. They had a little gold, and we went on.

Then we found a bag on the side of the road. Inside was poor Hercules, his throat slashed from ear to ear. And his magic sword gone! Realizing that we'd need some fighters and the cleric to tackle the orcs in their cave, we turned back to town. An Ankheg surprised us, but we managed to slay it. Oh yes, that human fighter, Din, had somehow partially healed LiChin. I've heard about these types. Call themselves anti-paladins. Really nasty guys, But the insect beast ripped him up and we had to carry him back to town.

We got him healed at the cleric's, then went to the Green Eagle, as we had some gems and jewelry we wanted the merchant to appraise. We had found them, along with a bone tube and a vial, in the Ankheg's tunnel. The merchant, named Bleen FanLanster, offered us a job carrying a package on a weeks' journey to somewhere, and bringing another package back. Turns out he was a cleric also. This pay was 50 gold per day, with a week's credit in advance to equip ourselves. He told us the piece of jewelry was worth 5000 gold, the two gems 1000 each, and the four gems from the orc cave which I still carried at 50 gold each. Then he told us that those other guys had been there that morning, with a shithload of jewelry. Apparently, they had found a secret door when we were off fighting the zombies, and had held out on us.

We accepted the job offer and went back to the inn to divide the gold. The jewelry and two gems we left at the Green Eagle, as no one around could cash them in. We got a receipt, so I hope they're okay. Ham and I, realizing that the others had duped us, split the four gems right there. Then we all went to bed. I guess they forgot I had the vial and the tube. The potion appeared to be some sort of oily substance, I'm not sure what. The tube I'll check in the a.m. Oh yes, the first vial I took turned out to be a potion of frost giant strength. Very handy.

Tomorrow I'll have to have a talk with those others about getting some part of that jewelry money. I don't expect them to give up my fair share, but I should get something. Seems like they're going on this trip with us too. Should be interesting. We'll see.


This morning I'm going to trade in my splint for plate. Also I'll leave my halberd in my room — I'm not good enough with that. Yet.


Another freakin' half-orc. Calls himself Fugyu. He came to the inn looking for Tarr. So of course Tarr came out of hiding and wanted Fugyu to go with us. Everybody saddled up and rode to the cleric's house. Dumb orcs didn't even mention they didn't have horses. The cleric had to lend them a couple of hers.

As we were riding to the orc cave we saw a shadow in the moat house, so we decided to investigate. Shit. No sooner had we gotten inside than a spider bites me. Next thing I knew, a couple of St. Alphonso clerics are standing over me. They said they'd send me a bill. 1000 gold pieces! Damn goodie-goodies. So neat and pretty on the outside, but when it comes to actual work they'll gouge a fella for everything he's got. Then they threatened me if I didn't give them a down payment. Had to give up one of my gems. Cripes. Gonna burn that church some day.

Anyway, we left the horses in town and walked back to the moat house. Searched through the whole place almost. All we found was a crayfish, which we killed, and a buried body, which had a couple of bracers and some platinum pieces. We also found a spear in a skeleton. I grabbed that. Come to think of it, the buried body had nothing on it. The treasure we found on the rotting body of an elf up in the spider's nest. But the rest of the place was totally empty, except for rats and slimes. We found a back way out, and went to the orc cave. That was totally cleared out. That escaped orc must have brought someone back to clean it up. All the huts were burned. On the way out we met four others from town, led by some other magic-user, a helper of Burn's. They said they followed someone up there from town yesterday. Wasn't us. Then we found three human-like tracks leading into the swamp. We went home.


Thoughts: Those other bastards are getting me pissed off. I know they came back here, burned the huts when they saw the lair cleaned out, then took off into the swamp after that treasure. Might have gotten it, too. Can't trust anybody. I don't think Tarr was involved, so he should feel miffed, too. He's a foul smelly creep, but I'd rather have him on my side than have to fight him.

That anti-paladin killed Hercules. He's got the magic sword. So far he seems mellow, but I wouldn't trust any of them as far as I can spit. The monk wound up with the bracers, too.

fin

Copyright ©Bruce Dries
House of Kilgor