Masquerade

Part 8

 

Continued...


 

 

 

Picking up speed Joey allowed the car to fully open up and raced back to the office, the racing again helping him keep his worries at bay. Perhaps Lundy would be there when he returned.  They were partners, and it was hard watching Lundy seem so much happier with Gutierrez than with himself.  What was causing his partners withdrawal?  God, back to that question again, LaFiamma,”  he taunted himself.  Didn’t have an answer the first time around, I doubt this time will be any better.   It seemed every time Lundy even looked at him he went ballistic.  Well today would be over soon, and it was already Wednesday.  He’d have the entire weekend to think of a plan, and they would have a case, so they would be together.  If he couldn’t come up with an answer by then, he wasn’t a very good detective, he reasoned.

 

Leaving his Alpha, he looked first for the Jimmy and seeing it, he then searched for Gutierrez’s Oldsmobile.  Not finding it he assumed that they had not returned, and there was only forty minutes left of the day.  Jealous that his partner had a case, he hurried back to the office and sat, again avoiding everyone, including Lt. Beaumont, who kept looking at him from her office.  Finally not being able to stand the looks any longer, he headed in her direction, and opening the door again that day, said, “I’m fine Lieutenant.  Don’t worry.”

 

“I was just wondering how it went returning the money.  I assumed you wouldn’t do anything foolish, like drive when you weren’t supposed to if you were not doing pretty well,” she responded.

 

A sheepish look coming over his face at the misunderstanding, he said “It went fine Lieutenant.” then quickly returned to his desk. 

 

As he poured over another file, making sure all the i’s were dotted and the t’s crossed, his concentration was broken, when Levon stormed in, furious and shouting.

 

“That the new car LaFiamma?”

 

“Hey can I...........” Joe Bill started.

 

Looking up, LaFiamma replied, “The Alpha, Yeah.  Got a problem?”

 

“I sure as hell do,” Levon shot back, as the rest of the department tuned in to the fight brewing.

 

“So?”

 

“Damn ya LaFiamma.  It’s *$%$* blue.”

 

“So?” 

 

“You know SO.  Ya cain’t be drivin’ it.”

 

“You gonna stop me Cowboy?”

 

“Can I se.........” Joe Bill tried to cut in to diffuse the mounting tension only to be completely ignored.

 

“Try me,” Levon snapped.  If it weren’t against the law I’d take a crowbar ta that thing you’re calling a car.”

 

“Try it, and die.  Simple.” LaFiamma threw out, thoroughly angered.  He needed that car, and no one, especially not his Texas partner was gonna deny him.  Standing, he took a threatening step toward Levon, then realized why his partner was so upset.  Looking quickly around the office, he lowered his voice, and moving in close as Lundy tensed for a punch, fear in his eyes, said “I understand.  Nothing is going ta happen.  Trust me?”

 

Matching LaFiamma in tone, Levon responded, “It better not, cause if it does you’ll not live through it.”

 

“Great statement. Lundy,” LaFiamma taunted.  “Any more brilliant words to add?”

 

“Fer now, LaFiiiiiaaaaama, why don’t we just drop it, but I’m watchin’ ya boy.”

 

“Okay last try, guys,” Joe Bill finally broke in.  “Can I see the car you’re fighting over?  And Lundy why the problem?”

 

“After works over, Joe Bill,” LaFiamma said, a smile again touching his face as he thought of showing off his beauty.  Sure was better than dating in some ways.  Cars never wanted anything from him.

 

“Nothin’ Joe Bill.  Nothin’” Levon said, quietly taking his seat opposite LaFiamma.  “Maybe ya can figure it out after work.”

 

“Fine.  Just asking,”  he said then took a deep breath and spoke the words that everyone wanted answers to.   “You two have been at each others throats for days now.  What gives?”

 

Watching the two partners turn to stare at one another as if they had only just met, was comical to the force, as both said, “NO WE HAVEN”T!” in unison, then sat in their respective chairs refusing to look at each other again.

 

“Dios Mio! Lundy was okay with me today.  Must be the Italian blood that riles him up.  He was so calm before the advent of “..how did you call him Levon, he shouted...... “Oh yeah, the Chicago Twister,” he finished smiling at the rest of the office.

 

Seeing Carol shake her head slightly, Gutierrez dropped into his seat, wishing he had kept his mouth shut.  Normally this would’ve been funny, but now was not the time, and he was right when LaFiamma loudly remarked, “Chicago Twister.  Funny Lundy.”  Then yelling “ I’m outta here, Lieutenant,” he opened the top drawer of his desk and removed the tape he’d found earlier.  One thing he had learned was you never knew when you might need some inspiration. 

 

The garage was close, but he didn’t make it out of the bullpen before Joe Bill grabbed his arm and stopped him saying, “You’re not getting outta here til I see that new car.”

 

“I have to second that,” Gutierrez added rising to join Joe Bill.  Catching a quick glimpse of Lundy, he stopped his progress and turned.  “Lundy.  Hey Lundy.  Levon?” he muttered, moving to the deathly pale mans side.  “You don’t look so good.  Somethin’ wrong?”

 

Receiving no answer, Esteban yelled, “Somebody get the station nurse,” as he knelt by Levon’s side and gathered his wrist to check for a pulse, only to have his hand knocked aside by a frantic LaFiamma.

 

“I’ll take care o’ him.  You get help,” he shouted, louder than he intended, then softly reached up to touch Levon’s cheek, pleased to note that his lips twitched slightly.  Remembering where he was he softly said, “Lundy, hey Lundy.  It’s me LaFiamma.  Come on, talk to me.  Things’ll be

fine.  Just fine,” he kept murmuring until Lundy started to respond slightly.

 

“La...LaFiamma, you’re here?”

 

“Yeah.  You okay man?  Ya look awfully pale.”

 

Shaking his head to clear it, Lundy looked at LaFiamma kneeling by his side, during the aftermath of his panic attack, the likes of which he hadn’t had since the beating.  Interpreting the look in his partners eyes as fear, Levon shakily said, “Fine.  Reckon I shouldn’t have had the Mexican for lunch.  Ribs are safer.” Then looked at LaFiamma again to see his partners eyes mask directly in front of him.  

 

“Glad ta hear it.  Ya want me ta drive ya home tonight?”  LaFiamma questioned.

 

“No.  I’ll be fine,” he said as the nurse entered the door, a running Gutierrez directly behind her.

 

“I got the nurse, LaFiamma. How’s Lundy?” Gutierrez questioned.

 

Looks like he’ll be fine.  Says it has to do with Mexican food for lunch,” Joey smirked as he watched the nurse move to Levon’s side as he rose to allow her room.  He didn’t say another word as she examined a very short tempered Lundy, who wanted nothing at all to do with her questions.

 

Soon she finished, saying “Just get some rest.  You’ll be fine.” and left the office.

 

Embarrassed at his spell, Levon hurriedly said, “I’m fine would ya’ll quit lookin’ at me.  I told ya it was the Mexican food.”

 

Taking his cue the group returned to their desks to finish clearing up for the day.  Lundy too, began to steadily straighten his desk, just to avoid looking at anyone, when LaFiamma leaned over and whispered, “Wanna tell me  what the panic attack was about?”

 

A hissed, “NO!” greeted his well intentioned remark and taking Lundy at face value in light of his recent mood LaFiamma spoke up loudly, “Anyone wanting to see the new car before I head home needs to come now, cause I’m outta here for the night.  I’ve got places to be.”  Then giving Lundy one more piercing look, he left the office, hoping that Levon had forgotten about the tape he’d tucked in his pocket.

 

While he was showing off his new hot rod to Joe Bill, Esteban, and a group of admiring men Lundy was sitting at his desk berating himself for losing his calm in front of his fellow officers.  Hell, he hadn’t had an attack of these proportions since two weeks after the beatings.  Even Sheila Lamont and her bed games hadn’t brought on a real panic attack.  While he knew that she and that case were the main reason he was still having nightmares and fighting non-stop with LaFiamma, something else had triggered the reaction and it had been so strong he was having trouble pinpointing just what the cause was. 

 

Taking another deep breath, Lundy finally pulled himself away from his desk and made his way to the garage, just in time to see his partner drive off waving over his shoulder to those still admiring the Alpha, the highly polished midnight blue paint glinting brightly in the early evening sun, then immediately he was  gunning the engine and roaring away before most of them had time to register he was gone. 

 

As he saw his partner speed away, Levon’s knees began to buckle, and he leaned heavily on the Jimmy as it dawned on him what had caused his attack a few moments ago.  LaFiamma had had a tape with him.  That damn tape.....or was it?  How many people had two tapes made that were identical.  Maybe he was imagining things.  Taking another deep breath, he silently reminded himself to breathe, as he told himself that it was just a figment of his imagination.  No one after a car accident like the one his partner had just been through would purposely do it again.  No, he added, as he opened the Jimmy’s door and turned on the engine, LaFiamma had family coming down, and he seemed to be doin’ just fine.  It sure didn’t seem fair, but that was the way it seeded to be.  He was a wreck, and his partner, for whatever reason just wasn’t near as upset as he was.  Okay,  Joey had been raped before but that shouldn’t make it easy to deal with.  Damn the man, so many things were working out for him, and here he was  living alone with the memories of his wife, not dating anyone, scared to sleep, and refusing to even think about the last case.  If it weren’t for Fooler he’d be alone.  Haunted and alone.  STOP IT LEVON ELMER LUNDY! He mentally screamed at himself.  You’re no more alone than anyone else.  There’s Mother Minnie, Joanne, the force, the horse, and LaFiamma. No matter how hard he was pushing the man away, when push came to shove he feared, no knew, that LaFiamma would be there to push back, just like he had when they were first working together.  LaFiamma wouldn’t let him retreat forever, like he had tried to when his wife died, and again after the beating.  LaFiamma was pushy.  He’d been pushy forever, and deep down, near his heart Lundy knew that the pushing was keeping him alive.  Givin’ him an anchor when he wanted to just float away.  LaFiamma would always be there for him, he knew that for sure.  The case had brought them closer then ever, and now when he really needed the man he was resorting to all his bad habits and pushing him away.

 

Talking.  I know I need to talk.  I just don’t want to.   Sighing heavily Levon turned the car towards home, then abruptly detoured and drove straight to Chicken’s, where he could once again allow his feeling to become hidden by interacting with his friends, or perhaps in a bottle.  Either one was an option as far as he was concerned, the only goal being not to think.

 

While he was pulling himself together and getting into his car, his only real thoughts being for some good cold beers, Joey was sitting in the doctors office waiting to have his follow-up visit.  As far as he was concerned the only thing he needed was a clean bill of health so he could get things back to normal.  Maybe if they were working a case Lundy wouldn’t push him away so much.

 

Finally the office door opened and a pastel pink clad nurse said, “Mr. LaFiamma.  This way please.”

 

“Comin” he said as he followed her to an examining room.

 

“Just hop up on the table and I’ll take your vital signs, then you can undress so the doctor can check you over,” she said indicating exactly where he was to sit, as she started to remove a pressure cuff from the hook on the wall.

 

Sitting in the indicated position, LaFiamma extended his arm, and watched as she placed the cuff, securely velcroing it around his bicep.  Slowly she started to squeeze the air plunger and he felt the familiar tightness as his veins and arteries were compressed.  As she released the pressure she placed her fingers on his wrist and took his pulse, then turned and made notations in his chart, before saying, “Open your mouth.   Dr. Mahadavai wants a complete file.  I’m going to take your temperature.”

 

Doing as he was asked, he closed his lips loosely around the thermometer and began the three minute wait, while she began checking his reflexes.

 

“Looks good,” she said smiling at him. “Just another minute and we’ll have your temperature reading.”

 

Nodding his head in understanding, LaFiamma waited patiently the last minute then as she moved in to withdraw the thermometer he allowed her to pull it from his mouth and watched as she accurately read it, then returned the thermometer to the vial of alcohol, so it would be clean for the next patient.  Making the notations on his temperature, she closed his file and turned to leave.

 

“Thanks, you were perfect,” LaFiamma said just as she was exiting and Dr.  Mahadavai was entering at the same time.

 

“My nurse was perfect, Mr. LaFiamma.  In what way?”

 

“Uh.....” he stammered as she pulled the door closed on the doctor and his patient.

 

“That is not an answer, and I know you have the ability to talk a lot more than that. I was your doctor at the hospital,” Dr. Mahadavai said laughingly.  “How was she perfect?”

 

Lowering his head slightly, to avoid eye contact, Joey replied, “She just took my stats.  Nothing more.”

 

“I think I understand,” Dr. Mahadavai said knowingly, then continued with, “why don’t we get you all checked out and see how you’re doing.”

 

“I feel fine doc.”

 

“Is that a fact, Mr. LaFiamma?  I think I’ll be the judge.  If I recall correctly you’re often misguided where your health comes into play.  Now I’ll just slip outside while you remove your clothes.  There is a gown on the table.”

 

“Doc, I really don’t think........”

 

“I think I’ve heard that line out of your mouth a few times before.  Now do as I say.  I’ll be back in two minutes.”

 

Mumbling, Joey did as the doctor ordered and waited for him to return draped in the gown the doctor supplied.  At least blue was a tolerable color, not like the yellow one from the hospital.

 

Two minutes exactly, Dr. Mahadavai strolled back into the exam room and began.  “Lets take a look at that hip first.”

 

Joey pulled aside the gown and allowed the doctor to probe the joint and muscles looking for new damage and to check on the healing process.  “Well?”

 

“Looks good.  How much did you grit your teeth when I rotated it fully?”

 

“Not much,” Joey stated.

 

“Truthfully?”

 

“Yeah.”

“Good.  Now lets check the ribs,” he said as he helped Joey lower the top of the gown and lay back on the exam table.  Taking a stethoscope he first listened to his breathing to make sure that he was getting the proper amount of oxygen, then began pressing lightly at first then more firmly against the damaged areas.  Noting nothing more than a few sharp indrawn breaths, he decided that for all practical purposes Joey was healing ahead of progress.  “Okay now for the head check and a few questions, then I’ll give you my verdict.  No need to look so glum.  This won’t take much longer,” he added as he noticed LaFiamma’s face.

 

“It’s not that doc, I just wanta get back ta work.  I need ta get back ta work.”

 

“I thought you’d been at work. I didn’t expect you to be sitting in your apartment all this time.  You need some exercise to heal well.” 

 

“I haven’t been sitting.  I’ve been at work, but confined to my desk.  I wanna get back on the job.”

 

Nodding his understanding, Dr. Mahadavai moved his hands to Joey’s head and probed the site of the burr hole, noting that it had healed nicely.  “Okay Mr. LaFiamma, just a few questions, and I want them answered honestly.”

 

“Of course,” Joey said winking exaggeratedly.

 

“Now I’ll have none of that.  First question, how do you feel?”

 

“Fine.  I keep telling ya I’m fine.”

 

“I know you do, but I am asking again.  Any major hip pain?  How about after prolonged sitting for example.”

 

“Okay I’m a bit stiff first thing in the morning and after I’ve been confined to the desk all day, but that’s to be expected.  Right?”

 

“Yes it is,” The doctor said reassuringly.  “Next question, how are you breathing.  Does it hurt after walking?”

 

“Not at all.”

 

“Good.  Have you taken all the antibiotics.  You didn’t register a fever.”

 

“I told ya doc.  I’ve been real good.  Makes me wonder what’s really wrong with me,” Joey replied smiling.

 

“Okay, last question,” he replied smiling back at his patient. Then looking carefully for any dissembling he asked,  “How does your head feel?”

 

Again refusing to look at the doctor, afraid that he would hear he couldn’t return to work yet, or even worse that he wouldn’t get better, Joey said, “My head hurts.  Not all the time, but most of it.  Truthfully it isn’t as bad as it was a few days ago.  That’s okay, Right?”

 

Not answering the spoken plea for reassurance that he heard, Dr. Mahadavai said “Where does it hurt, and on a scale of one to five how bad is it?  Also what have you been taking to help?”

 

“It hurts right here mostly,” LaFiamma said pointing to a spot just across from his eye on the right side.  I’d say it’s a two on the pain meter, and now that the pain pills are gone, I’ve been taking aspirin.” Joey finished then waited for the bad news he knew was coming.  The headaches refused to stop and he was worried.

 

“Good,” Dr. Mahadavai said bobbing his head up and down.  “That’s good.  Exactly what is to be expected.  The headaches will continue to diminish and should be gone in about another week, perhaps two at the outside.  If you can work with them I’ll give you the letter for the file so you can return to active duty.”

 

Releasing a pent up breath, Joey said, “Thanks doc.  That’d be great.”

 

“You get dressed and I’ll be in with a stronger aspirin then over the counter remedies for the next week, and I’ll bring the forms for you to sign.”

 

Already standing and starting to dress, LaFiamma muttered, “Great” as the door shut behind the doctor for the last time.  A few minutes later when the doctor had not returned, Joey went to look for him.  He wanted to be free and clear of doctors forever.

 

“In a hurry my friend?”

 

“Rather obvious I’m sure,” Joey replied smiling.  “You may have noticed that I’m not all that thrilled with hospitals and doctors, present doctors excluded of course.”

 

“No need to make nice now, Mr. LaFiamma,” Dr. Mahadavai laughed.  Handing Joey the release papers, he laughed as the man practically ran from the room, then sighed. Life would be simpler now, but a lot more flat.

 

Joey hastily got out of the building and stuffed the papers in his pocket so he would not forget them, then threw open the door on his car and stopped.  His car was blue, his partner was being impossible, and he had a clean bill of health.  The first would take some thinking about, the second needed fixing and the third gave him the ability to do it.

 

As abruptly as he stopped and these things ran through his head he jumped in the car.   First he needed a bite to eat then he would  head to Lundy’s.  Hopefully he’d be there and this would end.

 

He was full but wrong.  Levon was not at home.  This didn’t take him long to figure out since he pounded on the doors until Fooler started neighing, and still Lundy didn’t answer.  Add that to the lights being out all over, including the porch light, and as the brilliant detective he was, he thought sarcastically to himself, he’d have to look elsewhere, and elsewhere was only one place.  Chicken’s.  Lundy would be at Chicken’s.  Hell it was eight already.  He’d wasted enough time and the drive to Chicken’s would take another thirty minutes with Levon living so far out in the country.

 

Hopping back in the car, he hoped that when he got there his partner would be playing pool with someone and winning.  That would help if Levon was in a good mood he thought as he steadily accelerated.

 

While Joey was at the doctors Levon was pulling into the familiar parking lot at Chicken’s. He got outta his Jimmy and made his way purposefully inside and up to his favorite spot at the counter.

 

“Levon Lundy,” Chicken greeted him, “what kin I do ya for?”

 

“I reckon a beer is a good enough place ta start Chicken.” Levon answered as he took off his hat and placed it top down on the bar in front of him.  God he was hot and tired.

 

“Here ya go.  Guess I’ll add it to the tab.  Where’s LaFiamma?”

 

“Don’t know.  Don’t care.” Levon responded taking a long pull on the beer, then looking at the bar to stop further questioning.

 

Shrugging his broad shoulders, Chicken took the hint and stopped trying to talk to the man, but he was worried.  Something needed to be done.  Levon was being torn up, and he hated to see it happen again.  He knew that the two would need each other cause of the case they were on, but that didn’t seem to be happening.   Saying a silent prayer that the two would figure things out before Levon was lost again, Chicken returned to dishing out another plate of ribs.

 

“These are yours Annie,” Chicken said placing the dish in front of the police woman.

 

Upon hearing Annie’s name, Levon brought his head up and looked in her direction.  She didn’t seem to be with anyone.  Perhaps he would join her.  Picking up his empty, he held it up to Chicken saying, “Another” then continued to Annie’s table and sat down asking, “Is it okay if’fn I join ya fer a bit?”

 

“Course it is Levon.  Ya know better’n to ask.  Where’s LaFiamma?”

 

“Why’s everybody asking for him these days?  Can’t a ..........”

 

“LEVON!  I wasn’t really asking about him, but more stating that the two of ya are usually together and lately it seems like ya can hardly stand each other.  Somethin’ wrong?”

 

“No Annie,” he replied sheepishly.  “Nothin’s wrong.  Just felt like being out tonight,” he finished as he quickly opened the new bottle and finished half of it in one long pull.

 

“Taking it a mite fast aren’t ya Levon?” Annie questioned softly, growing very concerned.

 

“Don’t reckon it’s any o’ your bizness,” Levon said finishing the beer and quickly calling for another.

 

“Now Lundy,” Chicken said, bringing over the requested drink, “Why don’t ya call it a night?”

 

“Not just yet.  I think I want a few more.  Reckon I’ll just find a quiet table.  Night Annie,” Levon finished, as he rose and moved slowly to a table in the back, near the pool tables.

 

Taking a seat, he continued to drink his beer, while giving a little attention to the pool players currently using the table.  They’d be easy ta beat, he decided as he watched them miss a few shots.  Perhaps he’d challenge them after a few more drinks.

 

“Chicken, you know something about Lundy that I’m missin’.  I haven’t seen him hit the bottle this hard well....since Caroline.”

 

“I know Annie.  Figure he needs Joe,” Chicken said as he headed back to his B-B-Q pit.  “You take care of yourself tonight ya hear?”

 

“I sure will Chicken.  Watch out for Levon for me will ya?”

 

“Always do Annie,” Chicken affirmed.  “Now eat up.”

 

“Yes sir,” Annie snapped back good naturedly, then resumed watching Levon consume beer after beer.  She knew he could handle a lot, but when he’d had to much he could get rough.

 

As she was wiping her mouth of the Bar-B-Que sauce for a final time, and tearing into the packet of wet-naps, Annie looked up and noticed Joe just entering Chickens, a very determined look on his face.  Glancing quickly to Levon’s table, she noted that he didn’t move an iota, or even seem to realize his partner had entered.  Hoping that they would work things out for both their sakes, she also had to smile and give thanks that her dinner was finished.  There was no way, when the yelling started that she wanted to be around, and if the two men even laid eyes on each other there would be noise.

 

Looking back at LaFiamma she saw his eyes follow Chickens pointing finger, then give a nod and begin to saunter back to where Levon was.  Deciding it was time to leave, Annie wheeled her chair out in front of LaFiamma’s way and said, “Here for a reason, Joe?”

 

Smiling down at the red head he responded “Yep, gonna straighten that partner of mine out.  I’m sick o’ paperwork and his attitude.” then laughing added, “Fancy that, for a change it isn’t the world being sick of my attitude.”

 

“You’re just different LaFiamma, not bad.  Just took us Texans some gettin’ used ta.  We yell, but we do it slowly,” she said, smiling hugely to take any sting out of her words he may have applied.  He seemed to take things wrong a bit more’n most.  “Take care of him.  He’s needing something but I don’t know what.”

 

“I intend to Annie.  Count on a change by tomorrow or I might just go back to Chicago anyway.  He’s getting hard to live with.”

 

“Oh go on,” she finished playfully reaching up to swat his arm, then refused when he asked if she needed any help.

 

Briefly watching him continue his slow progress to the table, she thought how kind he was with women.  He’d make someone a very good husband some day.  Many of  the rape cases came to the two partners these days, and most of it could be credited to LaFiamma and his ability to put the victims at ease.  Oh well, she’d see how things went tonight from the safety of the bullpen tomorrow.

 

While Annie was making good her escape. LaFiamma was slowly edging toward his partners table, taking in all the empty bottles, the hunched over frame, and the weary downcast expression and knew that he had his work cut out for him.  He loved Lundy.  He was his best friend in Texas.  His best friend needed help, and he needed his friend back.

 

Taking a deep breath as he reached the table, he placed his hands on it, his legs spread wide, as if ready to begin fighting right away and said, “Got room for one more?’

 

Glancing up, Lundy sighed, and shook his head no.

 

“Didn’t figure you’d say yes, but I think I’ll join you anyway,” he said taking a seat across from Lundy.

 

“Chicken,” Lundy called holding up another empty.

 

Sighing himself, LaFiamma said quietly, “How many you figure it’ll take to make you forget?”

 

“You don’t know nothin’, LaFiamma.  Just go home.”

 

“Nope, I’ve got news,” Joey said, his speech becoming more lively.

 

“So.”

 

“So I’m gonna tell you whether you care or not.  The doc said I was cleared for good.  You know what that means don’t ya?”

 

“I figure you’re a gonna tell me, whether I wanna hear or not.”  Levon dead panned.

 

“It means I’ve been cleared ta do what ever it takes to shape you up.  Wanna talk or play pool?” he asked grinning.  This just might be fun, would be if it weren’t so serious, but Levon looking so defeated wasn’t funny.

 

“I wanna drink, “Levon said reaching for the bottle Chicken was placing on the table, but Joey’s reactions were a bit faster since he hadn’t been drinking, and he grabbed the bottle first and handed it back to Chicken.  “He won’t be needing any more.”

 

“I’ll do as I damn well please, LaFiamma, and you won’t stop me.” Levon snarled, rising unsteadily from the table and taking a swing at LaFiamma, which was easily avoided.

 

“You don’t wanna go there Lundy.  I’ll whoop you,” Joey stated firmly.  “In this shape it wouldn’t even be a contest.  Now I got all night.”

 

“Go away,” Levon muttered sitting back down.  “Don’t wanna see yur face.”

 

“Too late.  Now lets play pool.” LaFiamma said moving to the table and holding out a stick to his partner.

 

Lundy, taking the stick, just like he’d took the bait, said “You rack em.”

 

Nodding as he allowed a slight smile to grace his lips, LaFiamma did as requested, knowing that if he could keep his partner from the bottle, things would get much better, and talking would be easier.                                

 

The first game passed slowly in silence, with nothing more than a few briefly exchanged looks.  LaFiamma losing racked for the second game and allowed Levon a few more shots before he again ventured into dark territory.  “Levon, I think you’re letting things get ta you a bit.  Wanna talk yet, or just go on playing some more.”  There he’d laid the groundwork, and let his partner know that he wasn’t just gonna give up and go away.  Smiling again he knew he had the trump card anyway.

 

“Not gonna talk.  Want ya ta go home and leave me be.”

 

“Not gonna happen,” LaFiamma stated firmly, then took his shot, sinking the six ball easily.  Lining up for the next shot he added, “Life sucks.”

 

“You telling me,” Levon said, a spark of defiance lighting his eyes.

 

“Well if you’re not gonna say it, you’ll just hafta listen ta me.”

 

“Shut up then and play.”

 

“Fine,” LaFiamma said again lapsing back into silence, as he watched his partner take his turn.  An hour of play later Levon stood his pool cue on the ground and leaned heavily on it, his eyes tracking his partners movements closely.

 

“Ya should be home, LaFiamma.”

 

“I need to be here.”

“The doctor.........”

 

“Cleared me if you recall my earlier comment.” Joey said.

 

The snappy answer again brought silence.  Then Levon hesitantly said, “Ya seem ta be doin’ fine.”

 

“Looks can be deceiving.”

 

“You gonna talk then boy?”  Lundy questioned.

 

“When you do,” Joey replied back quickly.  “Now lets shoot, unless you’re ready to finish this once and for all.”

 

“Rack ‘em then,” Levon said, sinking the eight ball for the fourth time that night.

 

Glancing at his watch and noting that it was already near eleven Joey picked up the rack and tossed it down in the middle of the pool table then started slamming the balls into it, applying more force to each successive ball, as he allowed his stubborn partner to start getting to him.  He had no idea it had grown so late.  Taking a deep breath, he silently called on the saints for patience, and placed the last ball in more carefully then gestured to Levon indicating that he was ready for him to break.

 

As Levon again took his frustrations out on the game, Joey thought back over the past few weeks.  Levon had been there for him, tonight was his night for Levon.  He had to pull him out of the hole he was digging, thus saving not only his partner but himself as well.  “Nice shooting Levon.”

 

“I reckon.”

 

“Damn it Levon, talk ta me.

 

“Don’t wanna.  I keep tellin’ ya to go away”

 

“Go away, go away, go away,” LaFiamma taunted, his eyes going dark as he  moved right into Levon’s face.  “Can’t you say anything else, or is your brain fried from all the booze your hidin’ in?”

 

Pushing Joey hard, Levon said, “I ain’t hidin’ boy.  I just don’t wanta see your face.”

 

Stepping forward from the shove, Joey grabbed Levon by the shoulders and brought his face within inches from his partners and snarled, “I’ve had enough o’ this.  You’re talkin.”

 

“The hell I am,” Levon shouted back, then brought his right fist up and connected with LaFiamma’s face, staggering the man, but not breaking his grasp.

 

“If that’s how ya wanta play it, fine,” LaFiamma hurled back swinging Levon around and throwing him into the pool table.

 

“Shouldn’ta done that boy,” Levon growled.  “I’m gettin’ right angry wich ya.”

 

“Yeah, what ya gonna do about it?”  LaFiamma taunted.

 

“This,” Levon said, hurling himself at his partner, going for a head lock.

 

“I’m not losing, Levon,” Joey shot back swinging his pool cue at Lundy’s unprotected mid section as the man came at him, connecting solidly.

 

“Me neither, boy,” Levon said as he lunged for Joey’s shoulder preparing to continue the battle all night if need be.

 

“Missed,” LaFiamma mocked as he landed a well placed punch sending his slightly off balanced partner back over the pool table.

 

“Won’t happen again,” Levon echoed, connecting solidly with Joey’s jaw as he leaned in for a second time.

 

LaFiamma, furious that it had come to this let lose with a volley of upper cuts designed to take Levon down quickly.  All three connected and Levon again staggered, grabbing onto the pool table for support, but coming up even more angry, one eye already swelling.  Not only was Joey handling things fine, he was whooping him.  Well not this time if he could help it.

 

Heedless to Chicken crossing the floor toward them Levon returned the blows, sheer fury driving him on, as he connected this time with LaFiamma’s rib cage.

 

A guttural “Ooof,” leaving Joey’s mouth at the well placed punch, he yelled, “Now your gonna get it,” and unaware of the stir they were causing once again laid into his partner.

 

As the two traded blows, Chicken sighing and racking up the potential cost in damages, said to his patrons, “Nothing to see here fellas.  Were closed.  Go on home now,” and started shepherding his clientele out the door.   With a sigh, he glanced back at the two men still locked in combat and placed the closed sign in the window, then started clearing up for the night.  He’d need the early start if he wanted to get the place back in order after those two were done.

 

“Ready to stop yet, Lundy?” LaFiamma asked, blood dripping from the corner of his mouth.

 

“Not lessen you are,” Levon shot back as he absorbed another blow to the gut.  “Whatcha want anyways LaFiaaaammma?”

 

“I want you ta talk, yell, listen, anything but quit pushing me away man.  Ya ready ta talk yet?”  Joey replied as he unleashed another volley this time a right cross followed by a left hook.  He wanted to finish this, his ribs were hurting.

“Not ta you.”  Levon spoke as his head snapped back dropping him to the floor.

 

‘Well I’m what you’ve got,” Joey tossed out, standing above his currently prone partner, his eyes blazing as he tried to keep from kicking the smug look offa his partners face.

 

“Don’t wantcha,” Levon slurred, his eyes heavy with fatigue, liquor and pain.

 

“Tough,” Joey said kneeling by his side.  Holding out his hand, he let Levon grab it and  pulled attempting to bring his partner to his feet, but got surprised as his partner planted his feet firmly against the pool table and exerted his own pressure drawing LaFiamma down beside him.

 

“How much more sense do I havta pound into you?”  LaFiamma questioned.

 

“Just sit here fer a spell, kay LaFiamma?”

 

“Kay.  The floor feels nice anyway,” LaFiamma said, hope starting to show in his eyes.  Maybe it was time to talk.

 

“You know,” Joey added  biting the bullet and getting ready to play the trump card as it was now or never, “I’ve been thinking about having the Alpha repainted.  What do you think about red, or forest green?  That’s a good color for attracting girls.  You know, not to rough, yet still mysterious.”

 

Watching Levon intently for a sign that his comment was fully understood, he saw dark brown eyes bore into his very soul as Levon whispered, “When?”

 

“Could have it done on Saturday.  You could drive the rest of the week.”

 

“This another game, LaFiamma?  I’m not in the mood for games.”

 

“Nope.  I’m not in the mood for another car wreck.  Understand?  Also not in the mood for a depressed partner.”

 

“Yeah,” Levon muttered, then relaxed a bit. 

 

The two men sitting in companionable silence for the first time that night due mostly to neither being able to rise, were startled by Chicken saying, “I’m gonna go home fellas.  Lock up for me LaFiamma,” he finished, tossing the spare keys to the Italian.

 

Nodding acceptance LaFiamma scooped up the keys and leaned sideways slightly to shove them in his pocket, relieved that Chicken was gonna be gone.  The things he had to say were for his partners ears only.

 

Both men sat not moving until they heard the door close firmly behind Chicken, then Levon mumbled, “I still don’t wanna talk.”

 

“Didn’t figure you did.  Were ya like this with the psychologist after the attack?”

 

“Nope.  He didn’t irritate me,” Lundy shot back, a hint of levity in his voice.

 

“Thanks.”

 

“No problem.  Ya really gonna get the car repainted?”

 

Yep.  I figure it’s an investment in our partnership.  I want you to know I’m stayin’.”

 

“I’m countin’ on it,” Levon said a he allowed himself to relax against his partners side, while Joey interpreted it as, You’re the only thing keeping me here right now.

 

“Levon,” Joey asked, draping an arm around his trembling partner “ Would you be saying that the Italian from Chicago is helping ya?”

 

“Shut up Joey.”

 

“That’s what I thought,” LaFiamma replied allowing himself a small chuckle.  “Levon, I’m not expecting to know how you feel, just like you couldn’t understand why I didn’t tell Uncle Mikey about Chuck, and I’m not gonna pretend to know but I would like ta understand what’s eatin’ ya.”

 

“I don’t wanna talk.”

 

Dead silence met his plea, and he took a steadying breath then hesitantly began, “I didn’t like being outta control.”

 

Again dead silence.

 

Closing his eyes against the memories as another tremor ran through his body, he continued as he felt LaFiamma’s arm tighten around his shoulder.

 

“I didn’t like you seeing it.”  Another pause and he added “LaFiamma, since you’re always out a control ya just cain’t understand.”

 

“I think I can.  You’re saying you didn’t like it at all,” LaFiamma said simply.

 

“Exactly,” Levon offered with some spirit.

 

“You didn’t feel guilty though?”  LaFiamma asked, afraid of the answer. Guilt he knew was hard to overcome.

 

“LaFiamma.”  One word from his partner, short and pleading for no more.

 

God Lundy, you’re easy to read.  You do feel guilty. For God’s sake why?”

This time his inquiry was met with silence then hesitantly the speaking began again. “Well lets see,” Levon said derisively.   “Want a list?”

 

“That would work for starters,” LaFiamma replied.

 

“Great,” Levon muttered.  “Always wanting somthin that I ain’t prepared to give.”

 

Again silence greeted him, but the arm drew his head down against his partners chest and he could feel the strong steady staccato pounding of his  heartbeat.  Taking strength from his partner, he decided that he’d better get it over with, as Joey didn’t seem to be ready to give up, and he was to tired to fight any longer.

 

As soon as the realization hit him that this was it, the words tumbled out faster than he could stop them.

 

“Well LaFiamma, I feel guilty that I said yes to the case when I shoulda said no.  I couldn’t protect you.  You were hurt in more ways then one, but you’re not talkin’.  I didn’t even pay enough attention to know that you didn’t want the case, hell I even thought you’d like it.  I’m not convinced that your accident was an accident, maybe it wouldn’t have happened iffn I’d talked ta ya earlier.  I was used and couldn’t stop it.  Wouldn’t ya think I could control my own body?  I let everyone down.  I just screwed up all around.”

 

“Mother Mary of God what a load of rubbish!”  LaFiamma said taking a deep breath. There was so much to counteract and so few ways to do it. “ Okay Levon listen up.  I could list the same things and they’d be equally true.  It’s all in how you look at it.  We had to say yes to the case, people were dying and we were their best hope.  I didn’t protect you either.  I am talking and in a few minutes I’ll give you some great LaFiamma words of wisdom.  Why wouldn’t you have thought I’d like the case, I never led you to believe otherwise, cause it woulda made me vulnerable.   My accident was an accident, but yes I was considering suicide.   Wanna know why I didn’t act on it? I was worried about how you’d handle it.  I couldn’t stop them using me either, and I’ve had a bit more practice at being used.  We solved the case so no one was let down, and  lastly you didn’t screw up, it’s just a nice way to place the blame so you don’t have to say I was raped and I hated it.  It isn’t fair.  I’m scared.  See Levon that at least I do understand.  Now quit fighting it and let it out man.  You gotta let it out.  Then you can move on.  Didn’t the shrink tell ya that?”

 

“Think you’re so smart, LaFiamma.  Got an answer for everything don’t ya......”

 

“Yep, I’m Italian don’t you remember?” LaFiamma inserted to lighten the strained atmosphere.  He really didn’t want to talk either.  If his partner didn’t need it so badly he would go home and bury himself in exercise.

 

“How can I forget.  Ya never stop telling me,” Levon replied then pulling away from the strong chest and looking at the familiar blue eyes said, “Damn it LaFiamma I can’t take losing ya.  Not after everything else.”

 

“ I feel the same way cowboy.  You’re the best cop and friend a partner could ask for, just don’t tell anyone I said it cause I’ll deny it vehemently.”  LaFiamma said quietly.  “Ready for that great piece of LaFiamma wisdom?”

 

“Do I have a choice?”

 

“Not likely.”

 

“Shoot then.”  Levon replied.

 

“Levon, life isn’t easy and at some time or other we all have to face some demons.  I’ve had years with mine and am still haunted on occasion, but I figured this out.  You take the pain you’re given and you help others  lighten theirs.  You don’t hurt yourself or others in retaliation.  Let me help ya Levon.”

 

“How?”

 

“What do you need?”  LaFiamma questioned.

 

“I wantta know how you coped.  I wanna know how bad it really was.”

 

“I just told you.  I became a cop.  I help others, or at least I try when the system allows it.”

 

“Yeah but.....”

 

“Okay, okay.  I’ll talk, but only this time. I think I’ll tell you my last secret too, if it’s okay with you?” he added as he also started to tremble slightly, a fact that was not lost on his partner.

 

“Sure, I can handle another secret,” Levon answered, quieting as fear at what he may hear took control.  Joey’s voice had wavered strongly with the last question.

 

Okay Joey, get it over with.  Just take a deep breath and tell him.  It may help everyone, and with Chuck dead there is no more retribution needed anyway.

 

 Inhaling deeply and concentrating on steading himself, Joey whispered, “Being raped sucked.  Being raped by Chuck was worse.  What you don’t know, is that Chuck sold me twice after the rape to other men.  He threatened to kill cousins and uncles if I told, and you know he had the story about the gang initiation already in place. I was petrified. Feeling like I couldn’t tell, and being all alone except for Pauly, I did everything I could to forget, just like you are,  and landed in trouble.  Big trouble.  Uncle Mikey talked to me, and I prayed, but still nothin.  I was sure God had given up on me, I felt dirty, used, scared, and panicked that it would happen again, then one day I was in my room and I picked up the bible by my bed.  Yes all Italian’s have Bibles by their beds, so don’t ask.  My fingers opened the bible and I looked down, and I swear Lundy the words practically glowed, telling me that I wasn’t to blame.  The peace I felt was unreal, and although I still didn’t forget, I could live with it better.  Uncle Mikey’s next talk sunk in, and I decided that there must be a plan for me, so although I didn’t forgive, I did avoid Chuck completely and try to get on with my life.  I literally spent two holidays on the streets just to avoid seeing him in the house at a special occasion.  But I didn’t want him to win.  I didn’t let him win.  Chuck wasn’t worth it.  Don’t let Sheila win.  Don’t let your attackers win.  They aren’t worth it either.”

 

“Lord Joey,”  Levon whispered.  “I can’t imagine it could have been worse than the one rape. I feel awful for letting this upset me so, when you.......well you know.”

 

“Actually Levon, it just made hating him easier, and the resolve to stop jerks like him stronger.  God doesn’t give more than we can handle.  Geez I sound like a priest.  Stop me will ya?” he swore.

 

 

“Maybe......I reckon ya got a point, but still I keep getting these nightmares....and I keep re-living the details....then you’re in that Goddamn blue car.........”

 

“I’m fixing that remember?”

 

“Yeah, but Joey how long is it gonna take?  I can’t keep doing this.  I don’t want people to know, but I’m falling apart.”

 

“Lean on me. When it gets to rough call.  I’ll be there. How long did it take to sleep again after the attack?”

 

“Weeks, a month or so, why?”

 

“It’s only been about that long this time, and you’re just now talkin’.  You haven’t given yourself a chance.”

 

“I feel guilty that I’m glad they’re dead.” Levon whispered.

 

“Funny, I don’t.  Just relieved.”

 

“Ya think it was you’re um......uh........”

 

“I’m not gonna think about it, cause I don’t wanna know.  Lets just say I’m happy no matter how the deed was done.”

 

“Yeah, me too.  Just don’t want to think that it was a relation of yours.  I like your Uncle and that scares me,” Levon admitted.  “Didn’t want to think I could like a known mobster.”

 

“I love him,” LaFiamma stated firmly, “and I’m a cop, and a straight one.  I also got the impression that he’d take care o’ you too.”

 

“I wasn’t implying any different about you being a good cop.”

 

“Good.”

“Ya know Lundy,” Joey whispered, “I when I repaint the car I’m gonna need you too.  It feels kinda like skydiving without a parachute.  I’ve had the car to rely on for so long and this’ll change everything.  All the old rules will no longer apply, so I need you to be there for me as well.  Are you up to that?”

 

Smiling at his partners admittance at needing his help, Levon replied, “I reckon if you’re doing this for me, I can at least make sure I deal with my stuff for you.  Ya think this will make us better cops?”

 

“Don’t know about better cops,” LaFiamma quipped, “It’s hard to get better than we are, but I feel like our friendship just reached a new level.  I guess we’ll need to watch that in public.  Can’t let on that we respect each other.”

 

“You got that right.  Guess we’ll just have ta keep fightin.”

 

“I’m counting on it.  Wouldn’t seem like we were partners if we stopped fightin all the time.  Anyway, with you wrong so often I don’t see that as being a problem.” LaFiamma answered back, all his teeth shining in the soft glow of Chickens overhead pool light.

 

“I reckon we should get out a here for the night,” Levon said, attempting to uncoil himself from his partners grasp, as the closeness of their circumstances broke through.

 

“Yeah,” LaFiamma said, a feeling of weight seeming to drop from his shoulders.  “You doing better now?”

 

“I think so.  I got those Italian words of wisdom to think about.”

 

“Just don’t forget em.  Lundy, you’re strong.  I don’t think anything less of you.  Do you think less of me?”

 

A shocked look on his face, Levon turned to his partner and said, “Why would you think that?  Sounds like you’re feeling guilty now.”

 

“Not guilty just embarrassed I guess.  If you felt ashamed that I was in the room, then I should to cause you know a lot more about me than I ever intended.”

 

“No I don’t think less of ya.  In some ways I think lots more of ya for bein able to cope.  Couldn’t have been easy.”

 

“It wasn’t. But if I can do it so can you.”

 

“Yeah, I can.  Let’s get out of here.”

 

“I’m with you on that.  I think my butts asleep from sitting on the floor for so long.” LaFiamma said, as he loosened his hold on his partner.

 

“Well you’ll have to sit in my Jimmy for the drive home.” Levon retorted, pulling himself up from the floor, and away from the warmth of his partners embrace.

 

“You okay to drive?”  LaFiamma questioned softly.

 

“Yep.”

 

“It has been a few hours, so I guess ya should be.  Why don’t you spend the night at my apartment just to make sure though.”

 

“You gonna make one of those frittata things before work?”

 

“I can.”

 

“Then I’ll stay.  I feel hungry.”  Levon answered.

 

“God Lundy, I don’t think were goin home just yet,” LaFiamma said gesturing at the mess their fight had made of the pool table area.  “I guess we should clean up a bit.”

 

“Probably owe Chicken that,” Levon agreed.  Ya know he warned me against ruining his establishment once already, and I said I wouldn’t”

 

“Famous last words, Levon.”

 

“That’s what he said,” Levon joked leaning over to pick up a fallen chair.

 

Picking up the broken pool cue LaFiamma said, “I’ll have him put this on your tab.  After all you broke it when it hit you.”

 

“Right my tab.  What ya mean is you’re broke again.”

 

Seeing Joey shrug, Levon smiled.  Some things would never change.

 

As Levon continued to clean, Joey looked around the bar and after a few minutes said, “Didn’t we start out in a fight kinda like this and wasn’t it the beginning of some understanding between us?”

 

“I guess it was, why?”  Levon asked.

 

“Just seems like things are coming around full circle. Another fight, another understanding and another beginning.  Maybe next time we can skip the fight though and just talk,” Joey quipped.

 

Levon stopped, turning to meet LaFiamma’s eyes.  Silent understanding passed between the two men.  After a moment he gave a shrug.  “May be,” his voice carefully noncommital but he smiled and there was just a hint of amusement in his eyes as he rubbed his face.

 

Joey turned back to straightening with a grin, recognizing agreement in his partners look.  Things would definitely be okay.

 

 

 

The End

 

 

 


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