WayToDie

What a Way to die !
Kilthalia
A rugged looking Negaduck types, deep in thought, at the computer keyboard. He hasn’t stood up in days and all he’s been doing was typing.
“Boss!! You have to come out of there sometime!!” called the Fearsome Four from out side the locked door.
Negaduck rubbed his unshaven chin and thought about what to write next. An idea came to mind and he, once again, began to type ferousiously, careful not to forget a single thing.
“Boss!!” Megavolt pounded at the door. Negaduck ignored it all together and continued.
“Ah, shit! Writers block!….Oh, no I got it!” and he started again. Apparently, listening to loud rock music helped him to think. His resources were almost used up; going through almost all of the CD’s and already gone through all the cassette tapes that he collected in his lifetime. And believe me, that’s A LOT!! If there’s one thing that Negaduck did in his infrequent free time, it was listen to music.
“Darkwing, you HAVE to get him out of there!” Bushroot begged. He was on his knees and clasped his hands.
“He’s been in there for four days with out food, water, and I’m sure, without sleep!” Quackerjack chirped in.
“Negaduck’s going to kill himself like that! That’s no way for a SUPER super villain to die!” The Liquidator added, clearly concerned as the others.
Darkwing looked at these pathetic beings, looking up to him, begging. But he just couldn’t let them down, besides, it was four to one; odds were against him. “I’ll see what I can do.”
“OH THANK YOU!!!” all four cheered.
A little Quack Fu and the door was down. “Negaduck?”
Darkwing found him still deeply involved at the computer. Negaduck had changed his wardrobe completely. Now he was out of costume and the only things he was wearing was a pair of beat up denim jeans and his mask. His evil twin hadn’t even looked up to see the door hit the floor; in fact he continued to stair, unblinkingly, at the computer screen.
“Negaduck! Snap out of it!!” Darkwing grabbed the duck with the blank look and shook him thoroughly but it didn’t work. He only went back to typing after the good-doer put him down.
The Fearsome Four cautiously walked in and peered at the scene. They had thought that their boss was suicidal or severely depressed, NOT deep in thought writing….A STORY??!!
After being pestered a little more, Negaduck said in a horse voice that was clearly not used for a while “Leave me alone, you knobs.”
“C’mon boss,” Megavolt said, worriedly. “Come eat something, or at least give it a rest,”
“Yeah! You’ve been at it for days! Can’t it wait?”
“NO! It CAN’T wait! I’ve GOT to finish!”
Everyone silently decided to drag Negaduck out, regardless of kicking and screaming.
“NOOO!! I’ve got to finish!! Put me down, you knobs!! I mean it! If you don’t you are going to be SO sorry!!”
The five of them threw Negaduck onto his bed and strapped him to it. “Let me UP you knobs!”
“Now Negaduck,” Darkwing mothered. “You can get up when you’ve had some rest.” To the others DW instructed, “And be sure he gets some nourishment.”
“Right!”
“Okay”
“You can depend on us, Mon Capitan!” And Darkwing left.
“Darkwing!! You’re NOT my MOTHER!! You can’t DO this to me!” He continued to complain long into the rest of the daylight hours and some into the early evening. By then he had quite a raspy voice and had completely exhausted himself out from struggling and yelling. Negaduck then quickly fell into a deep sleep.

He could hear a female laugh tauntingly behind a corner. He went to check it out. No one there. How strange. The place, where he was, was very dark but the dim red glow of numerous, unseen, exit lights barely highlighted the way. You were lucky if you didn’t bump into a shadowed wall. Then he heard the voice behind him.
“Come find me, Negsy!”
He whipped around, but there was still no one there. “Where are you?” he asked himself. Negaduck grinned rascally and went in search of the voice. “Where are you?” he sang to the “no-one” voice.
“Over here, sweetie,”
Negaduck enjoyed this game of cat and mouse and at the moment he felt like a tiger on the prowl. The chase continued, for what seemed like eternity, and the evil duck was having fun. But eventually, tiring of this game he wanted to find her so he could see her obvious, pretty face and slim figure with the softest white feathers in the world. Her eyes, sparkling and a hint of rascally evil.
“Where are you?! I want to find you! I want to see you!”
“You’re the one who has to find me, sweetie! Come find me! I want you to find me!”
“I’m trying! Give me a hint?”
“No, I can’t,” the voice said sadly. Then resuming her cheeriness, “Come find me!”
Oh, no! The voice was getting to far ahead! Negaduck ran to catch up, running toward the eternal darkness, but she was too fast and he eventually lost her. “Nooooo!!” He fell to his knees and felt a ping of pain in his chest as if he was dying. “Come Baaaaack!” the masked mallard shakily reached for the departing giggles.
His breath was growing short and he had to practically gasp for air. His surroundings were growing dim and fading to black; light-headedness was settling in. His arms could no longer support his weight and buckled under him. Negaduck could feel his heart pound in his chest and then suddenly stop with a “Sproing”. Slipping further into the darkness of death, a tear came to his eye and the fear of death came to his fading mind and a fear of something else; not having anyone to hold his hand as he went to the other side. He, at that very minute, wished he had someone and that she would be there to support him. No one here, he thought, no one to mourn for me!
At the last minute he saw a bright light and squinted at it.

“WHA?!!” Negaduck abruptly awoke. Unfortunately, the first thing he saw when he opened his eyes was the Fearsome Four. Go away, you knobs, he thought
“Welcome back to the living, boss.”
“What do you morons mean by that?!” Negaduck said shakily with a horse voice.
His gang, standing before him, glanced at each other stupidly. Megavolt bent down to the hospitalized duck, “Boss, you were almost a goner!”
“Huh?! How is that possible?!! What happened??!”
A thin, long legged nurse pushed through the crowd, in the room, and explained, “You basically had a system crash. Lack of nourishment, sleep, and the fact the we discovered traces of radiation poisoning, from being at the computer too long, resulted in an over load so…” she continued to explain in high tech talk and completely lost Negaduck. Maybe it was because of the fact the he was getting light headed again and couldn’t hear anything over the ring in his ears.
He closed his eyes in hope that it would all go away. It didn’t. It only got worse. Not sure of whether his muscles were doing what he told them to do, he winced in pain. He wanted to cover his ears to stop the incessant ringing, but he couldn’t move a thing. Then he felt nauseous, and every internal organ felt like it were being squeezed from the inside and mashed together. At last, his synapsi couldn’t handle it any more and they shut down and everything went black.

The next time Negaduck opened his eyes, he did so very slowly. He felt incredibly weak. Then he could sense feeling and could once again hear. But what he heard was not pleasant; it was the sound of someone’s heartbeat being played on a machine. He realized that the heartbeat was his! They had him hooked up to a respirator.
What a way to die, he thought.
He tried to move his fingers, and could!
A nurse came over and started to fuss with the machine next to him, not realizing that he was awake.
Not wanting to be alone, Negaduck snatched her wrist and gave her quite a start. She ran to get a doctor. After she left, Negaduck felt that he had the strength to sit up, so he tried, only then the nurse came in with the doctor and told him to lie still.
He would hate to obey, but did so. They removed the respirator and asked him, “How are you feeling?”
“I feel like I haven’t moved in years. What’s it to you?!”
“Sorry if this comes as a shock, but, you haven’t moved in years.”
“WHAT!!!??” could be heard through out the building and from outside. Negaduck was feeling better, defiantly!
“Please stay calm! You’ve been in a coma for six years.”
“Me?? The all-powerful Negaduck? In a COMA??!!!”
The doctor winced in fear at the enraged duck, but the nurse walked closer and asked, “Negaduck? You’re Negaduck?!”
“Yeah! Who the hell ELSE would I be? A Cute Little Lost Bunny?!”
He got fed up with this nonsense and all of a sudden felt a great rush of energy return in him. After removing the IV’s and trashed the place. Then he went to get his clothes.
Outside, he high jacked a car and sped toward his hideout. Cop cars were on his tail and he enjoyed the much-needed game of speed tag. Although, he found it unusual that no one remembered his name. When one lucky cop car managed to gain enough speed, it pulled along side, the officer seemed puzzled of Negaduck’s mask. Negaduck promptly swerved into the car and it skidded into a street lamp.
“Ha, ha! Take that, you sap cops!” When he reached his hide out Negaduck thought that rest was a good idea, being that his muscles weren’t used for quite some time and he was getting weak again. He rested for two and a half weeks. At the end of the second week, he was really restless, but still thought he still needed more energy.

He dawned his costume and set about the streets of St. Canard. He couldn’t use The Trouble Maker, for the fact that the oil hadn’t been changed in six years and could very well just not work. Being that six years passed without him, Negaduck headed over to the library and had some reading to catch up on; namely, newspapers.
At the St Canard Public Library everyone stared at the brightly dressed duck as he read the computer. My, how times have changed! No card catalog, no book check- out cards! EVERYTHING is on COMPUTER! I’ve missed too much! Now I’m behind in the times! I’m such a fossil, Negaduck thought gloomily.
Then something caught Negaduck’s eye; a recent article about HIM!
“What the….” He read closer and discovered that over the years there was a fire and most of the files were destroyed. This accident was not an accident, either. It just screamed Megavolt. Only he would be an idiot enough to do something unimportant like that, Negaduck thought. For some reason or another, he looked at the desk and found a newspaper and skimmed that thoroughly. In that he found an article stating that, a certain duck fitting Negaduck’s description perfectly, was going to get taken off life support, the day he broke out of the hospital, because funds on keeping him alive had run out. It must have been me! Because, when that nurse came in and toiled with the machine, I could feel the oxygen source shut off! They were going to KILL ME!!
He got up and felt like robbing Sparkler’s Jewelers, so he did! Maybe it’s till there after all these years…..   Why wouldn’t it be? France will be EVER so pleased to see me again, he chuckled to himself.

That night he sat down to eat a pizza he ripped off a delivery boy and watched the news.
“…..A new villain has been sighted throughout the week. No one knows who he is but Quiverwing Quack assures that he will promptly put away in jail…”
He nearly choked on his beer, “WHAT!?? Quiverwing??!! Where’s Darkwing Doofus??!!” He slammed the can down, jumped to his feet, and donned his hat. “I’ll get to the bottom of this misunderstanding!” he grumbled. Out he set on his newly fixed motorcycle.
Now, he though, how to get some good-doer’s attention? Negaduck looked up and saw a billboard advertising Quiverwing Quack and that everyone should be a good boy and girl. “Yech! It’ll be a god-send to get rid of that thing!” He hid The Trouble Maker behind a dumpster and proceeded to make his way up to the roof and to the billboard. The first honor he did was deface it, then rigged it to fall on any unsuspecting citizen. So he dug out the ol’ lawn chair and relaxed while he waited for someone to come along. He didn’t have to wait too long.
“Negaduck! What are you doing back?! We all thought you were dead!!” the recently arrived heroine exclaimed.
“Well I’m not, now am I?” he responded smugly. “Soooo,” he began. “I’m going to ask nicely only once, where’s Darkwing Duck?” he said deeply.
“I’ll never tell you!” The billboard creaked threateningly and the hero gasped. Evilly, Negaduck smiled widely. “Now come, come. Where is he?”
“Eat arrows, evil doer!” The billboard squeaked again, a little more this time.
“You’d better tell me, Missy, or someone’s going to get hurt, badly!” Just then the two on the roof head a mob of people on the street watching them from below.
The police had arrived and got their searchlights going. The light cast upon Negaduck from the low angle was intimidating to the heroine, who remembered how evil he was when her own father fought with him. It made Negaduck even more scary, though she was bigger now and not as easily intimidated.
Then, as the board began to fall Quiverwing whipped out an arrow and her bow, ready to fire at it to stop it’s descent. This was interfered by her rival, who knocked them out of her hands and used them against her to keep her from her job. “Noooooo!!” The billboard fell and they could hear the screams of tens of people as they scattered for safety. Negaduck leaned over to see the chaos. “Aah, that was sweet,” he said deeply.
“You MONSTER!!”
“Well thank you! I try my best.” He mocked.
“How could you ever think of hurting innocent people?!”
“It’s really quite easy, really,” He laughed maniacally.
Quiverwing was almost in tears. Nothing that bad had happened since before the Fearsome Four reformed. And with Negaduck been gone all those years, nothing was beating them down, away from their dreams.
Negaduck stomped over and knocked her out with a swipe of the handle to his gun to her head.

The next thing she knew Quiverwing was in a cage suspended from the unseen ceiling. She got to her knees and went to grip the bars, but was shocked when she got close.
“I wouldn’t do that again, if I were you,” said Negaduck’s voice from nowhere. “I took the liberty to make sure you and your hero buddies wouldn’t try anything funny.”
Quiverwing looked around and found Gizmoduck and other rookie hero’s.
“But one thing puzzles me,” Negaduck began. “Where is Darkwing Duck? I’ve easily rendered and captured every other hero sap in this city and the next, and now I’m getting annoyed here! Where is he?!” he balled up his fists.
“Right here, Negaslime!”
Negaduck wiped around to find his old time rival. “Aah, Darkwing Duck…TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH!!”
“Well sorry to burst your bubble. Now, what do you want?!”
“Why did you disappear?”
“Me disappear?! What about you?!”
“Medical reasons. You?” Negaduck crossed his arms.
“You were gone. Without you the Fearsome Four dispatched and there was no more big time villains to apprehend.”
“What about Dr. Slug?! Where’d he go?!”
Darkwing shrugged. “Maybe he got caught in the hurricane? No one knows what happened with him.”
“Hurricane? When?!” Negaduck exclaimed.
“Oh, two or so years back. Man, you were really ‘gone’, weren’t you?”
“Yeah,”
“Back from the dead, I see! Well, enough chit-chat! Let’s get this over with!”
“Right you are,” Negaduck took a controller from behind his cape and pressed the big red button on it. Darkwing jumped out of the way in time before the anvil landed on him, but unfortunately, caught the corner of his cape and it was a BIG anvil. He was stuck!
Negaduck smugly walked over and took aim with his shot gun. “Say bye-bye to your birdie, duck!” he referred to Quiverwing.
Fear entered DW’s eyes as he saw his untimely demise before his eyes. Then, out of nowhere a boomerang hit Negaduck’s hand and he dropped the gun in pain. “What the…?”
Every one watched as the boomerang returned to its owner.
“Who the hell are you?!” Negaduck snapped
“I’m Boomerang Boy, and I’m putting a stop to your evil ways!
“Ooh, I’m sooo scared!” the duck mocked. Darkwing still attempted to free himself. He had to leave his rip proof cape behind in order to save himself.
“D’Oooooh!” Negaduck gritted his teeth in frustration. “Ok,” he growled. “NOW you’re gonna get it!!” He whipped out the biggest gun he had and fired at the good-doer.
Boomerang Boy cart wheeled out of the way and threw his primary weapon at the enraged duck before him. Negaduck ducked just in time and up righted himself and stuck out his tongue, childishly, in defiance. He forgot to duck again on the return of the boomerang and it hit him hard at the back of his head. Negaduck faltered, then fell unconscious with stars flying about his head.
“Good work Boomerang Boy!” Darkwing cheered.
“Thanks. So, what do we do with him?” BB asked.
“We send him to jail, like always.”
“But Darkwing he ALWAYS escapes!!” Quiverwing argued.
“True, Quiverwing, but I’ve devised a plan of action this time so that he can’t get out of his cell that easily.”
“Oh yeah? What?”
“You’ll see,” he rubbed his chin and looked at the electric cages from the corner of his eye.

When Negaduck regained consciousness he found himself behind bars. “Knobs, don’t they know prison cell can’t hold me?” he grumbled to himself. He went to grab the bars and received a shock. “What? They’re stealing my idea??! How dare they!!” Looking around the outside room he was trying to find the generator to the cell so he could cut off the power. “Where is it?? I hear it, but I don’t see it!” Then he tried to listen for it to see which direction it was. Still nothing. Then he took a long shot and knelt down to the floor. It was underneath him!! “DAMN!! When’d that moron get so smart?” Then he started looking around to see if there was anything he could reach that he could use to dig down there. Nothing.
Furiated, Negaduck punched the wall and he had hit it so hard that his hand began to bleed. Not caring about loosing the red liquid, he sat down on the board that was suspended by chains held parallel to the floor. Sitting there, he looked around to see anyway to get out, whether it be from calling for a villain’s help or if he could make it on his own. Nothing.

Days passed and Negaduck merely observed. There came a guard at about eight in the morning, twelve in the afternoon and seven at night to give him food. Then the watch hours were rather erratic being that the guards sometime forgot the he was in there. But usually there came one every two hours, give or take a few minutes and seconds. He would escape at night when their senses were dulled and he would be under the cover of night.
The night of the planned escape was unfortunately chilly. Negaduck could tell by the cold falling off the wall. Oh well. This could be a good thing, as well as a bad thing.
As planned, the same guard came with his dinner. Negaduck judged that he could easily knock him unconscious.
“Alright Negaduck, dinner’s served, stay away from the door or I’ll use force, or you could not eat,”
He sounded bored and monotonous. Negaduck stayed where he was, leaning on the brick wall, across from the bared door, with his arms crossed. The guard unlocked the door and Negaduck made no move. The guard set the tray on the other side of the bars. While stupidly lowering his head, to make sure he didn’t electrocute himself, Negaduck pulled out a rubber band from his sleeve and looked as if he were playing with it. The guard was on guard and thought that suspicious. “N, now don’t do anything, y, you’ll regret!” the guard whimpered.
The guard watched as Negaduck bit off a button to his cuffs and created tension in the rubber band and the devious duck aimed. Standing there, stupidly, the young guard was an easy target and Negaduck knocked his unconscious with the button. Walking up, Negaduck retrieved his button and the guard’s gun, and then walked out.

Ashamedly heading back to his old hideout he found everything packed up in boxes. “What the…” Negaduck went rummaging through, what apparently was his stuff, and found everything intact even after six years. “Wonder why that is?” As he scratched his head, Negaduck then heard growling from behind him. He stopped all movement and looked over his shoulder. There were his Dobermans coming into the light from the darker parts of the hideout! They were well fed and in prime condition! “Well, well, well, now. Who’s been taking care of you?”
“I have,” said a sad female voice, emerging from the darkness as the dogs had.
“G, Gosalyn?”
“Lord Negaduck?!” The older, than he remembers, Gosalyn ran up to him and flung her arms around his neck and squeezed. After suffocating the dark duck for a good minute, he forced her away and she folded her arms behind her. “You…you’ve grown.”
“I’m 18 now, Lord Negaduck!”
“Geez,” He looked her over. She was way taller than he; her flaming red hair was as long as her slender torso. She wore a pain dress of pink and there was a gold, oval locket around her neck. She noticed him looking at the trinket and so she went over and explained, “After you were gone, I found a picture of you and put it in.” She opened the locket and there he was, along with a picture of her when she was 9. “I took care of all your stuff, Dad, sir. You’ll find it all in order and in great condition!”
“Oh yeah! Thanks for nothing!!”
Gosalyn was taken back by this.
Negaduck continued to explain, “Now I got to unpack all my things and it’s like I was only her not more than a week ago!!!” He took his boxes into his room and slammed the door. Gosalyn led the Dobermans back to her part of the hideout.
In his room, Negaduck unpacked and grumbled to himself, “God damn dames! Think they’re helping, but they’re just in the way!!”

He finished unpacking and set about reconnecting his computer. He switched it on and went back to what he hadn’t finished, due to a Darkwing disturbance. He read over what he did those six years ago and was astounded. He reread it and continued to write a little more before he was hungry. Night struck rather hard and The Great Negaduck went out in search for some good food.

Around the dark corner he hits some girl and they fall back and hit the pavement. Negaduck shakes his head and looks at her. She’s staring right back at him. He gets up, brushes himself off and yells, “Why don’t you watch where you’re going, clumsy!!?!”
She got up and stood her ground. “Oh, excuse me oh ‘powerful’ Negaduck!” she said, disrespectfully.
He snapped his head toward her and glared. She glared right back with the same resentment. Negaduck was impressed. Impressed about the fact that she had the gall to stand up to him. Most fled in fear and were more than subservient to him. While lost in his thoughts, he saw her across the way, going into a building. For some odd reason, he followed her.
Entering, he cautiously looked around and went in further. He could hear her, in the darkness of it all, and followed her footsteps. Through a door and up a stairwell he kept his distance, yet tried not to loose her. She must see in the dark as well as he, for she never turned on a light or bumped into anything. Then as Negaduck found himself in this labyrinth of hallways, that this was the same place as in his dream!
“Looking for me? I know you’re following me, Negaduck. I could hear you.” Her voice echoed in the halls.
“Where are you?!”   Negaduck turned where he was, trying to pinpoint where she was.
“Why don’t you come find me? If you’re so ‘Great’ you’ll be able to locate me no problem and pacify me.”
Just as in his dream this was so surreal!! Then Negaduck had an idea. In his dream he was following her voice and it led him to disaster. His idea was go in the opposite direction!! As she cursed and teased him he still felt as if his goal was getting further and further from his grasp when he spotted her!
Slinking in the shadows, the masked mallard of malicious misdeeds, crept up on her, unknowing of her stalker. Just before it was too late, she spotted him! She tried to take off running but he grabbed her just in time and held her fast. She naturally resisted and struggled.
Then a flash of thoughts ran past him. “Hello Michelle, miss me?” But, the thing was…they were complete strangers! How could he have known that??!!
She stopped, shocked that Negaduck knew her name. She looked at him, into his eyes, as he was doing with her. There was a definite connection. She must have had similar dreams, because now there were thought crossing her mind, memories from surreal events in her life. He let her go, slowly, and she just stood there, never removing their gazes from one another.
Eternity was passing by them as they stood there and stared into each other’s windows to their souls. There came this warm feeling as they smiled on the inside, but in reality Negaduck stood there with a serious straight face and she with a shocked one.

They were blinded by a light coming from a spotlight coming down from a corridor. “Hey! What are you doing here!!?” came the voice of a security guard.
Instinctively, Negaduck grabbed her wrist and dashed with the agility and speed of a cat down the perpendicular corridor and led her to his world. Alarms were sounded and he had to help her evade the law. This continued on for some time and they wee getting tired.
He looked up and grinned. “We’ll take the elevators!” he said almost too loud; the guards might hear. She knew this too, but he motioned her remain silent. Apparently, sound travel remarkably well in this building. He dashed over to the elevator and pushed the “down” button, then went back to her and hid behind a pillar. The cops saw the elevator moving and all headed down the stairs.
Now Negaduck opened up the vent cover and helped her in, as well as himself and led the way.
Michelle whispered, “Why do we have this strange connection?”
“Ssh, you want them to hear?”
Too late. “They’re in the vents!!” called a guard.
Negaduck cursed and the two scrambled to the outside through the new labyrinth of ductwork. Negaduck kicked the grating off and got out then helped Michelle down.
The moonlight casting down on them was positively entrancing for both. As Negaduck held his hands to her arms, he could felt hat their heartbeats were hard and in sync. They looked up a the full moon and back at each other.
Regardless of the poor timing and lack of really knowing each other, he went in for a kiss. Michelle seemed to fall under his spell and go along with it…until the guards threw the roof door open with a loud clang, startling the two.
Negaduck knew this wasn’t over and guided his prize to freedom.