THE DISH.
FEBRUARYdish.

SATURDAY, February 28, 2004
WEN'S TOP 10 LIST: CITY LIFE If you know me well, then you'd know that I'm a totally homegrown city boy. Yep, minus the few childhood years spent in Jax, FL, the bulk of my life has been spent in and around DC, Power Capital of the World: growing up in suburbia; partying up in the city. It's obvious that my tastes are geared towards the fast-paced city-life. Afterall, "fast-paced-east-coaster" is my middle name. Well ---since graduation from Maryland (GO TERPS!), I've dedicated a good part of my life to traveling. And through my travels, I've come to pick and choose some of my more favorite places. Take a look at my TOP 10 LIST...

10. PHILADELPHIA, PA Philly is not one of my "conventional" cities. In fact, I don't really connect with how compact it feels. It's streets are clausterphobic, and for some reason I tend to feel dwarfed while blending in with the small-scale surroundings. However, it still maintains that "big city" feel for something relatively small. It's historical, which is a plus. It's a college city, which is even more of a plus. But number one --- it's got tax-free shopping. *ahahah* But of course, right?! Why else would it be on my TOP 10 LIST?! On the real, Philly does have its share of eclectic flavor, and I appreciate that. From the commercial feel of Market St. to the artsy-fartsyness of South St., Philly's definitely got the "east coast city" vibe goin' on.

9. SAN DIEGO, CA Daygo is west coast laid-backness personified. It's actually kind of a sleeper in my book; your typical hokie kind of town with lots of sunshine. San Diego differs greatly from it's northern neighbor, Los Angeles, as well as its even more northern neighbor of San Fran, in that it's very laid back, relatively quiet, but unequivocally gorgeous. The beaches that dot the coastline boasts picturesque perfection, and the weather is perfect year-round. My personal favorite part of San Diego?! La Jolla... Although Daygo lacks in city points (it's city is rather lackluster when compared to the likes of New York or Chicago), it's definitely a great place to raise a family. All in all, Daygo gets points on beauty alone.

8. SAN FRANCISCO, CA The Bay Area of California is home to San Fran, the quintessential gateway to the pacific northwest. It's probably Cali's closest thing to a real-deal East Coast city: big buildings & big businesses. It's a city of culture. It's a montage of ethnic identities. It's home of Golden Gate! Its panoramic views of the Bay are amazing. It's night life is reputable. All in all, it's a great place to visit. Dinner at Ghirardelli Square at dusk offers a fantastic view of the city, while driving down the infamous Lombard St. is just a "must-do" for all who visit. San Fran has got it all: food, fashion, fun. It's a little HILLY, but hey... that's just one of the things that makes this place unique.

7. MIAMI, FL What can be said about Miami, FL besides the fact that it's probably the only place in the country where almost 90% of the "beach" population can best be seen with as little clothing as possible? That's no joke. Miami and South Beaches are known the world over as some of the best along Florida's southern coast. South Beach has a nightlife that is unparalleled; undoubtedly unique in many respects. It's also one of the only places you'd run into rollerbladers gliding up and down streets wearing nothing but a thong... that means men, too, believe it or not. Besides that scary fact, Miami is in close proximity to the beach-bum isles of the Florida Keys. While in Miami, party street-style at Mango's, have a nice dinner at one of the many restaurants in Coconut Grove, take in the sights and scenery of La Vizcaya, and lounge and mingle with the stars at Mynt. But a true Miami experience is not complete without a dip (skinny or otherwise...!) in its awesome waters.

6. BOSTON, MA Do you think this city is only known for its baseball team and clam chowda?! Hellz nah... Bahstuhn, or Beantown, is truly a northeastern city. Its got the fast-paced business daily grind going on, as well as an interesting nightlife. Like many other cities, it offers a great interlocking relationship between city and suburban life. Though Bostonians aren't known for being an outwardly friendly bunch, they are known to "keep it straight-up and real." When in Boston, you get nothin' but the real deal. It's a university town, as well... home to some of the nation's top institutions like Harvard and Boston University. It's home to a winning baseball team, and also offers tax-free shopping. It's got a charming air about it that meshes the feel of "old money" with "new blood." Nightlife is decent, and food is off-the-chain... but the true Boston experience isn't greatly experienced without a cup, or bowl, of some real New England Clam Chowder. Grab a taste at one of the many stops in Faneuil Hall, get stuck in "game traffic" near Fenway Park... walk where our country's smartest have schooled at Harvard Square, and enjoy the shops along Newbury St. Stroll along the landscaped scenery of Boston Commons, and revel in the cool accents of the locals. It can be rather dull at times, afterall it's no New York City. But it's got its own "big-town-in-a-small-city" charm.

5. LONDON, ENGLAND Our neighbors from across the pond have one of the world's most outstanding cities. London is cosmopolitan, world-class, historical and modern all rolled into one. For a less-shocking intro to the world of Europe, London is the city to start off with. The historical landmarks that dot the city are numerous: Big Ben & Parliament, London Bridge, the Tower of London, the Tower Bridge, etc.-etc.-etc. Even the money-wasting Millenium Eye (aka The London Eye) is eye-catching. Driving on the other side of the street, and at the opposite end of a car, can be a bit overwhelming for first-timers, but you easily get used to it. The city bustles with chic, modern style. Londoners have a great style and confidence that allows them to get away with a lot of the mainland Euro trends, yet they yield to fashions that are pretty much simple and classic. The London experience is NOT complete without a visit to Harrods - the nation's leading department store. At Harrods you'll find anything from signature handbags and glassware, to the latest by Dolce & Gabbana and Jil Sander, to Krispy Kreme donuts. The myth regarding Londoners and bad teeth is true, unfortunately (as is the myth about Europeans and their "smell..." EH...), but all that aside, London is definitely a place to be. Their under/overground transit system is off-the-chain, reminding you to "Mind the Gap." It's surrounded by little towns with big families, like Windsor. And although it's not exactly known for its cuisine, you must complete your London experience with a dose of bangers and mash or fish and chips. Samosas will do you good, too, as will some Cadbury chocolates. If you consider yourself a fat-kid, then Sainsbury will become your very best friend. Buckingham Palace, Trafalgar Square, Knightsbridge ---all will make your London experience worthwhile. Cheers!

4. WASHINGTON, DC Not listing my hometown as a major city would be a major sin, and I'm not saying that just because I'm biased. DC has become a gem in the past few years. It's a "monumental" town, and Washingtonians don't take that nickname lightly. There's a monument for almost every president, political figure, foreign diplomat, war, ethnicity...you name it, DC's got it. The sad part is that a visitor can't come to DC to experience the true beauty of it with just ANYONE. Even many of the locals don't know the city well enough to uncover its many hidden treasurers. A typical "Washingtonian" can easily point out major monuments, landmarks, and shopping areas. But a TRUE "Washingtonian" will uncover every little nook and cranny of the bourgeoning town. DC is almost known only for its NorthWest quadrant, but what people tend to forget is that the city is made up of four quadrants: NW, NE, SW, SE. Put all four together, and you've got yourself one big city. It may not house the skyscrapers of New York or Chicago, but its buildings in and around the financial district are vertically massive. It's also a college town, with schools like Georgetown University, The American University, and the Catholic University of America. The city is known for its lawyers and politicians, with power bars and lounges dotting the streets surrounding the famous Penn Ave. residence: The White House. It's home to the Smithsonian Institute, the U.S. Capitol, the Washington Monument, as well as The Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts. DC is home to "old money," with "new money" making its rounds more and more with the emergence of its growing IT industry, which services the powerful U.S. Government. Neighborhoods have their own flavors: the Penn Quarter boasts the sophistication of the Financial District --- have a power dinner at the Old Ebbit Grill, Asian fusion at TenPenh, or grab a martini at Juste Lounge. Check out the new Convention Center and restaurants around Mt. Vernon Square/Chinatown. Join the college crowd as they mix and mingle with ethnic diversity in Adams Morgan. Party it up along DuPont Circle, and shop your butt off in the little boutiques and shops of Georgetown. DC has a bustling nightlife, a competent employment rate, and a very classy air about it. It's where Dixie meets Yankee; a true connection of North and South.

3. NEW YORK, NY NYC is the epitome of UNIVERSAL CLASS. It may not be all that clean, nor is it all that comforting. But it's unabashedly hip. NYC is intimidation on a silver platter or a paper plate ---whichever way works best for you. It's home to world-class restaurants, Broadway theaters, haute couture designers, high-class shopping. No other city in the world can compare to NYC's limitless energy. It's raw, it's urban, it's home of the Big White Way. No matter what travesty New Yorkers come face-to-face with, they resiliently rise back to action. Life never stops completely in NYC; it's the city that never sleeps. You can take in art at the Met, you can watch the world's top performers at Lincoln Center. You can shop the top names along 5th Avenue, and you can chill in the bars and lounges of SoHo. Stroll along Greenwich Village, or the NYU campus... or take a day or two to figure out just how big Central Park really is. Walk updown, walk downtown, or take it easy in midtown. Overwhelm yourself with the lights and sights of Times Square, or pace yourself along the residential palaces of Park Avenue. Life is grand in NYC. It's a world all its own. It's no wonder that even Jersey guys/gals try to claim it as their own... Close, but no cigar. NYC is strictly NYC; worldclass all the way.

2. LOS ANGELES, CA In a city where almost everyone has a talent resume tacked to their forehead, it's no wonder that Los Angeles has a mystique that's all too foreign to the rest of the world. It's the entertainment capital of the universe: HOLLYWOOD. What separates LA from the rest of the cities on my TOP 10 LIST is the fact that its actual "downtown" is relatively small compared to others. But the area that is known as LOS ANGELES is sprawling. You definitely need a car to get you from point A to point B. Whether you're chillen along Marina del Ray and Santa Monica, or living it up in the Valley, the Los Angeles experience is one like no other. While its suburban living is definitively "southern californian," the greater experience of Los Angeles is all glitz and glamour. However, it's definitely not for everyone. Just stop and listen to bathroom conversation at any bar along the Sunset Strip and you'd be amiss if you didn't happen to eavesdrop on some heavy "industry talk." Women are tanned and styled-out, and men are just as image-conscious. It's where boobs, pecs, and abs make a statement all its own, and that's not only at the beach. Take in the relaxation of waterside comfort in Malibu, or drive along the scenic PCH. Take a stroll on the Santa Monica Pier, or ride the mechanical bull at the Saddle Ranch. Catch industry nights at Avalon or Shelter, or take in the shops of Beverly Hills or Melrose. Los Angeles is like its own planet ---detached from the fast-paced hustle/bustle of the east coast. But that's what makes it unique. It's where power comes through entertainment. While DC houses politicians and diplomats, LA houses entertainers and producers. Grab sushi at Katana or Koi, and get fat-kid burgers and hot dogs at Pink's. Score a chic shirt from The Hustler Store, or a new wallet from Ferragamo. Party alongside MTV's Real World alumni, or catch a glimpse of your favorite actor at Fred Segal. Hollywood is where the unexpected can, and will, happen. But keep your eyes peeled. It can be hard with all that sunshine... but its the sunshine that helps rank LA at a close #2.

1. CHICAGO, IL Topping my list of cities at the moment is the midwest's jewel: Chicago, IL. Why Chicago?! Well, ideally it is a mixture of both the comfort and charm of the West Coast while maintaining the class and cosmopolitan air of the East Coast. It's one of the world's most beautiful cities, with it's greater part of town being home to some of the country's tallest buildings. The people of Chicago are friendly; they boast a silent-like charm that can best be read through their smiles and gestures. A great part of the city is relatively clean, and it boasts world-class vistas and images superimposed by the grandeur of Lake Michigan. The Chicago experience is incomplete if you don't go on one of the famous architectural river tours. The best time to board is at dusk. The boat takes you up and down a part of the Chicago river, winding it's way through the grand architectural mammoths. At the mouth of the river, the boat enters a lock and is then transfused into Lake Michigan, where the night view of the cityscape is unlike no other. Lights abound at night, and the beauty of Michigan Avenue in lights easily rivals Rodeo Drive or 5th Avenue. Chicago-style pizza is a must-try, as are many of their other Italian dishes. A stroll along Navy Pier, munching on churros, is a nice, calming experience. Driving along Lakeshore Drive gives you another great view of the city while taking in the sights of the gorgeous coastline. Shopping is great, despite its hefty tax rate. But the sights, sounds, and surreal experience of the city quickly takes hold. Also a college-town, it's home to campuses such as Northwestern U., Loyola University, and the University of Chicago. The Sears Tower and the John Hancock Building provide the best views of the skyline, especially at the latter's Signature Lounge. You can shop till you drop at name brand and local boutiques. You can wine and dine at some of the nation's best. You can also catch a game at Wrigley Field, see the exhibits at the Shedd Aquarium, or have cheap eats at Chinatown. There's so much to be offered in Chicago. It's truly the smile of the Midwest. Freezing winters and sizzling summers await you in this great city. Chicago = number one in my book.

So there you have it. Wen's Top 10 List of Cities. Stay tuned for the next "best" list.

WEDNESDAY, February 25, 2004 (a little later...)
YuCK. It puzzles me that some people simply have no kind of fashion etiquette for the workplace. No, in fact...it actually AMAZES me. Yes, that's it. It amazes me. OK, so there's this guy that works in my office. He's fat. OK, I said it. I know I consider myself fat, too, but this dude is most def fatter. Like belly-hangin'-out-fat. And he's black, not that this is meant to be racial or anything. Seriously. (oh, and he has one of those huge asses that you can't help but notice and gag about... it's gross and actually sad that people have to live with such a butt. it's definitely depressing.) So he comes into work sometimes wearing a button-up white shirt - your typical button-up white shirt - with NO undershirt on. OK, how you gonna do that? How you gonna be black, come into work, wear a white button-up shirt with NO undershirt on?! It's almost like wearing a f*cking barong without an undershirt on. And because he's black, it's more noticeable. It's not even his belly, or his nips, or whatever else is hanging out that cause people to sit and stare in disgust. It's just the fact that he's wearing that kind of shirt with NO undershirt/t-shirt. I mean, I did not write the books on fashion, but that's just something that you know you don't do. Esp. at work. If it's one of those thicker shirts that don't reveal anything (ie, SKIN COLOR) then that's fine. You don't have to wear anything underneath because no one will even care. BUT when you're wearing a shirt that's f*cking thin as cellophane (it was probably some sad Perry Ellis brand or something), I'm sorry but cover yo' ass up with a t-shirt, PLEASE?! Esp. if people will be sitting around you during a meeting. That just grosses me out. It's gross. It's trife. It's freak-nasty. It made me feel "eww" to actually think that someone, who is definitely older than I am, could actually commit a fashion crime the way he did. I hang my head in shame.

WEDNESDAY, February 25, 2004
STILL HERE. *SIGH* I'm still alive, so don't worry about me. AHAHAH. Just been kinda busy.

It's Ash Wednesday...!

THURSDAY, February 19, 2004
10 QUESTIONS. First and foremost... let's give a round of applause for Camile Velasco, who made it to the TOP 12 of American Idol 3. WaHoO! That's one Hawaiian down. Two more to go. I'm going for an island-sweep here, people. ALO-freakin'-HA!!

Here are some questions to jump-start your day:

(1) Are you a person who tortures yourself by standing on a scale each time you see one?!

(2) What ever happened to City High?!

(3) Don't you think that Clay Aiken is a dork?

(4) Which do you prefer: TARGET or WAL-MART?

(5) Don't those ugly creatures on the Quizno's Subs commercial make you not want to eat there anymore?

(6) Red wine? Or white wine?

(7) Do you think that it was fair that Barney got to eat Fred's Fruity/Cocoa Pebbles, while the Siwwy Wabbit didn't get to eat Trix? (I'm not letting this one go, obviously...)

(8) Britney or Christina?

(9) Do you think that you are beautiful no matter what they say, and that words can't bring you down?

(10) Where's Waldo?

WEDNESDAY, February 18, 2004
SILLY RABBIT. Remember that old commercial for Trix cereal? You know the one... "Silly Rabbit! Trix are for kids!" Well, I just wanted to say that I hated those kids for never letting the rabbit have any Trix. I mean, why would it hurt to give the poor rabbit Trix? They're just small pebbles of flavored sugar (which resembles rabbit poop now that i think about it... eww.). I mean how rude were those freakin' kids?! THE RABBIT DESERVED TO EAT HIS TRIX!! My friend told me, over IM, that the reason they probably didn't give the rabbit any Trix was because white kids might try to feed their Trix to real rabbits. *rolling eyes* Yeah, whatever. It's almost just as bad as Fred being mean to Barney for stealing his Fruity or Cocoa Pebbles. But at least Barney got to eat it. Silly Rabbit wasn't so fortunate...

*sniff*

THURSDAY, February 12, 2004
V-DAY'S AROUND THE CORNER. Emmm... V-day is coming soon. It's coming fast. It's just coming. V-day for the single person can be such a conundrum... (have i told you that i like the word, "conundrum?!" ahah... oops, that was on my xanga page.) So anyway. Yeah, V-day can be a conundrum. Some people get all depressed and warped-up about it. But others just take it as another day. In fact, it IS just another day, but it's a holiday. Who says the single person can't enjoy a V-day for him/herself?! Last year, on Valentine's Day, I went to work... It was a Friday. It was rainy, gloomy and definitely gross. I think the weather was secretly answering my prayers for a blah-blah day. It even began to snow late that night. But anyway. After work last V-day, me and my friend Ellen (also single) decided that we couldn't let the holiday go to waste. So... we did the "I-LOVE-MYSELF" personal V-day extravagaza: a hair session (that means hair cut and style) at Roche Salon, and then a very cozy dinner at Sequoia on the water front. Wait a minute, both Roche AND Sequoia were on the water front. LOL. So yeah, we went there. We spent mad coin, but oh well. It was V-day, and we loved ourselves... It was great. The next day we drove to Norfolk in the snow, and missed the horrible blizzard that hit the Metro Area. For three nights we stayed at Kathy's place near ODU, just chillin' in the rain while everyone north of us got a LOT of snow. That was GREAT. *SIGH* We felt so mean being able to go out to eat, shop, and chill while everyone at home was stricken with cabin fever. Ahhh, the memories of V-days passed...and CRABLEGS.

This V-day probably won't be as eventful. First of all, I no longer sport any hair to go to a freakin' salon to pay more than $50 on a cut... Shoot, I don't even have enough hair to go to Bubbles. LOL. I just need my own clippers, and I'm good. I certainly don't feel the need to eat at Sequoia, or 1789, or Neyla, or Zaytinya, or Cafe Atlantico... or any of these nicey-schmicey restaurants that dot the city and its suburbs. Give me a salad from Wendy's, and I'll be a damn happy ass mo-fo. So this V-day I plan to meet Carrie during the day. She wants to go to J.Crew. OK. AHAHAH. I'd rather go to Zara because I saw something that I wanted there, but my mind's telling me to stick to H&M. I'm on a budget.

So you see, V-day isn't all that bad for us single folk...! Just find other single folk, and spend the day chillin'... OR, if you can't find any other single people, then this is a day to indulge in some self-pampering. Go to a movie by yourself, or hit up a spa for a massage, or pop in some DVDs and watch yo' butt off, or just drive around the city, with your windows open, and a cool song blaring from the radio... Make it your day. V-day is YOUR day. Live it. Love it. *wink*

Oh, since everyone and their mother has this on their sites...I'm jumping on the bandwagon. Here are the states where I've been to:


create your own visited states map or write about it on the open travel guide

MONDAY, February 9, 2004
COUNTDOWN TO A L-O-N-G WEEKEND. The countdown has officially begun, my friends. I am preparing for a long-weekend... *WaHoO* I don't have anything extraordinary planned, nor do I want to. I just want to relish in the fact that next week I only have to come into this office like 4 times. That's one day less than usual. Now that we've figured out that I am a math prodigy, we can move on to more thought-provoking issues and yada-yada-yada.

I was in Georgetown this Saturday with Rehe, and we were walking around the place because she had to look for stuff. Not gonna go into detail about anything, but that's basically the gist of the reason behind our going to G-town that day. While we were walking around, however, I did notice something relatively weird. I noticed that there were people ---mostly girls--- were walking around the place practically posing like they were waiting to be caught on film or something. They'd be dressed in their trendiest, and would try to profile and look seeminglessly towards the horizon as if they were part of some major modeling shoot for BCBG or something. WTF?! I wanted to laugh at some of these people cause they definitely looked stupid beyond belief. But hey, whatever moves you. It was just something that I noticed, and I found to be quite hilarious. Since when has DC been known to be pretentious?! Hmmm...

BTW - The Alamo Grill in G-town has great ceviche. I highly recommend it...

THURSDAY, February 5, 2004
LET'S LEAVE IT ALONE... Aren't you sick of hearing about the damn Janet Jackson/Justin Timberlake debacle at the Super Bowl? They're making a HUGE deal out of nothing...seriously. And now they've decided to renig on Janet's participation at the Grammys?! This is unbelievable. They can make a huge deal about J's boob, but they haven't even mentioned anything about the guy who streaked across the freakin' field... Sure, America's Puritanistic views on nudity are way-warped. Let's get over it, people. It's not like you haven't seen a boob in your life...as if it's a bad human body part. GET OVER IT!!

MONDAY, February 2, 2004
MENTALbabble. You know you're in a quarterlife crisis when you're mentally bogged-down with thoughts in your head about what to do next? in life. You know you're in a quarterlife crisis when you're physically affected by these mentally-driven emotions through uncomfy panic or anxiety symptoms. You know you're in a quarterlife crisis when you come to a halting decision that a 21-and-over beverage will not help your problem go away. Hell, if you're experiencing any of these things then WELCOME TO MY WORLD. Welcome to Kin6wen's Quarterlife Crisis! Sit back, keep your arms and legs in the car, and enjoy your ride...!

I've blogged about this whole "quarterlife" crisis over and over again. But now, it seems to be affecting me most. Not so much in terms of personal relationship issues, but moreso (for me anyway) in terms of personal career issues. Careers, relationships, love, money... what else do we live our lives for, anyway?! Oh, I forgot: HAPPINESS. I've been on this emotional rollercoaster for almost a year already, and slowly - but surely - I'm getting closer and closer to figuring out the path outta this slump. It's definitely a day-by-day process, and it's something that I'm looking forward to as it all unravels. But day-by-day is how I'm gonna go about my business. It's safer, and it'll definitely keep me sane.

I wish that life could be less complicated, for myself especially. I've always believed that life has been a bowl of cherries, and it has been. Growing-up, things would just seem to fall into my lap; good things, of course. And even through college, life was just full of those instant-gratification-moments, most often handed to you in what seemed to be a silver platter. I wish that my personal issues and problems were as easy as they were back in school. I remember those nights I'd be at my dorm, stressin' over the writer's block that I was suffering from; my paper being due in about three days. I easily could remedy the issue by calling up my friends, "Hey, do you guys wanna meet up for drinks?!" And *POOF* all of a sudden, I was out of that slump... in my car... headed to the city to meet up with my friends who were just as eager to meet-up for drinks than to sit down and tackle the writer's block, the math equations, the critical analysis, or the lab report that was due in about three days. Life was so much easier then; not to mention a lot more fun.

These days, our issues aren't so quickly rectified. And the sad part about it is that we spend most of our time at home wallowing over this bullshit. Long days at work are now capped-off by staying indoors afterwards, making excuses as to why we're so tired or lazy. Truth is, we're just getting old. But getting old or not, why is it that life isn't so stress-free as it was when we were students?! Why is it that life's minute problems can't be figured out with a few beers and some fries... or with a movie... or even with a drive around the neighborhood? A few years back, these were perfect remedies to our little problems. But now, even the smallest problem affects us so much.

I think it's moreso troublesome when you perceive your life to be always lived outside the box. And for many people in this day and age, that's exactly how life is lived: OUTSIDE THE BOX. I am a prime example of this. Call me non-conformist... call me a rebel... in actuality I'd probably not call myself either of these things, but take away all the fluff and stuff and YEAH... that's just exactly what I am: a non-conformist rebel. AHAHAHA. Ain't life grand?! *smile*

Some of my friends would probably call me a CHARISMATIC non-conformist and rebel...something I don't quite understand nor believe to be true, but hey. I love my friends, so I'll give 'em the benefit of that doubt any day. But what is it that I am rebelling about?! What is it that makes me such a non-conformist? I often thought I knew the answers to these kinds of questions. I mean, I thought that I was non-conformist in the most-simplest ways, meaning I was a friend to all, I could easily adapt to all types of situations, I was open to all styles, yet when it came to what I wanted on any given day then BAM, I'd get what I wanted. Why? or, more importantly, How?! No clue. Perhaps it was the "charisma" kickin' in... ahahah. Whatever the case may have been, all I know is that I thought I knew who I was and why I was the way I was. But in actuality, I was absolutely clueless! But I guess we all are clueless during those times... our "Days of Discovery" as some people might call it.

Well... somethings held to be true. Today I can honestly say that, yes, I am definitely a non-conformist. Not in the "save-the-world-and-don't-take-a-shower" kind of way. I'm a non-conformist in another sense... in the sense of living my life according to MY own line, and not according to society's line.

I think the best way to explain this would be to make parallels to the movie, Mona Lisa Smile. I saw the movie Saturday night with Gina, Carrie, and Primo. It was interesting, nonetheless. I didn't expect it to be anything than what it was. In fact, I had no idea what the movie was about. I just knew it was a movie with Julia Roberts, and those are usually good... esp. with a cast including Kirsten Dunst, Julia Stiles, and Maggie Gyllenhaal. It was interesting. It was about Wellesley College back in the 50s. Many of us know the reputation that Wellesley has as an institution of higher learning. It's considered one of the "top" schools in America, and more importantly, a top ALL WOMEN school. Even back in the 50s, Wellesley was one of the nation's top schools. Women graduated from the school with great degrees; graduates were known to be the best in the nation. But what was hidden in all that "glory" was the fact that the women were schooled, only to be relegated to living a life of marriage and housewivery. Degrees in literature, biology, accounting, or even law would be nothing of importance as the students were schooled to place their womanly duties as house wife (and, eventually, as "mothers") above all else. In essence, the "great university" was simply a finishing school in disguise.

Julia Roberts' character was the saving grace for the women in her class, as well as for the school. Her character taught the women to NOT be afraid of breaking the molds that they've been shaped into. And in the process of the movie, the characters reveal their "coming of age..." their eventual "break" from the traditions of patriarchal America to find their inner voices, and to be unafraid to live their lives according to no one's rules but their own.

It was such an interesting film because it made me think of my own mom. Although my mom grew up in the Philippines, she was also faced with many of the same issues that the characters faced in the movie. But when she got married, came to the States, and decided to live her married life in her way, she realized that there is a balance to everything in life. She learned that each and everyone of us, men and women alike, can handle anything that we're faced with; that we don't have to necessarily live our lives according to a mold that's been handed down from generations.

In years past, society has deemed the "line of life" to consist of growing up and becoming educated, and then becoming housewives (for women) or working to support the family (for men). It was unheard of to be a man staying at home to watch over the family, or it was unheard of for a woman to be a housewife and continue her studies to become a doctor and/or a lawyer. It was equally unheard of to live life as a single person --- deeming the lifestyle to be lonesome and uninspiring. Years later, the notions have changed incredibly, but the underlying "societal norm" is still the same. Perhaps it will forever be the same. But at least people are now unafraid of breaking out of these society-given molds and creating their own paths in life.

Many people believe that life begins after school is done. After you've gotten that degree you're supposed to get out there and get married, settle down, have children...which is fine for those who truly feel this to be their calling. But more and more, people are looking past this "norm" as being the absolute path to take; myself included.

While I respect marriage, and I respect the lives that people take-on to build nations by raising families, I personally don't see it as the absolute way for everyone. Or if it is, I don't necessarily see it as something that has to be constricted by age, sex, or perhaps the amount of knowledge one has from simply "living life." Some people in life have marriage as their life's goal. Others have their careers. Others even have the simple quest to just continue learning as their life's goal. Others simply want to see the world. There are so many paths and by-ways to which we can live our lives according to, and that's the beauty of it. Allowing ourselves to be so diverse in terms of our ambitions and dreams is such an awesome thing. Being strong enough to seek out these ambitions and dreams, no matter what, is even more awesome.

I think that coming to this acceptance has been quintessential to me becoming who I am today. And in coming to this acceptance, I've certainly been privy to the inner-workings of a quarterlife crisis. But to tell you the truth, without bumping into walls during this mini-"crisis" I would never have come to the acceptance that there is certainly more out there in life...and that I shouldn't be afraid to go out there and seek it. My life is not confined to staying in a place that I've always known... My life is certainly not confined to being subjugated to society's norms... But most importantly, my life is certainly not confined to being just comfortable. My life, as should be everyone's life, is to be happy...true happiness comes from envisioning your dreams and going after them as much as you can. Only after trying, and after giving yourself your own benefit of the doubt, can you truly call yourself "accomplished." To live in self-doubt is cause for sorrow. But to live in self-confidence is cause for a celebration.