Joshua Dean Thomas McNaught


Thank you Susie!!


I gave birth to a healthy 8lb.3oz. little boy on January 5th, 1989. I was only eighteen years old. I had this little bundle and had no idea what was in store for his life. Being so young, we grew up together. We went through many tough times, but because we had each other, we managed to come out the other side ok. Josh was a true blessing to me. He was always there, so even in bad times I was never alone.

I suffered years of clinical depression and that never fazed Josh. He was always so strong and level headed. If I needed help, he sought it. Whenever I needed a hug, he was there to give it. Through it all he was developing into a wonderful human being, so compassionate and loving, supportive and giving. He was my best friend. Well, that was all taken away from me on Valentines Day 2000. A day that will always have new meaning to me.....

Of all the days for Josh to be taken, a day of love. Josh had been at his new school for three weeks and they were going on a school camp. He was so excited about going, and to be honest, I was looking forward to the weeks break, as I am a single parent. If only I had known that the break I was looking forward to was going to be so permanent. My last memory of Josh was him walking up the driveway with his Nana hitching up his pants. At 9:45 pm that evening there was a knock at my door. It was the police, I stood there in a daze as to why they were there. Not for a second did I think they were there to tell me what they came to say...."We regret to tell you that your son Joshua drowned today while swimming in a waterhole at the school camp".

My legs gave way as I screamed from the pit of my soul. How could this be ? Joshua was such a happy, healthy boy, he couldn't be dead. But no matter how much I cried and begged to have Joshua home with me, it was not to be. He had been one of 59 children swimming at what turned out to be a dangerous waterhole, with not nearly enough adult supervision. He and a friend of his drowned right under the noses of these adults and not one of them saw it. A child had to call out to the teachers that Joshua was in trouble. They blew the whistle to get the other children out of the water. Not long after, they found the other boys body and got him out of the water. They worked on him for a while and brought him back to life not knowing that just a few meters away my precious child lay dead. They flew the other boy to a hospital where he died some hours later. Now, here is what angers me so. The adults did a head count and all came up with different numbers, and yet, the teacher in charge, didn't even know how many children were on the camp. Apparently, there were children saying "Where's Josh?" and were told to go away. Two long hours later, they did a role call after the children wouldn' let up about Josh being missing.

Then they realized what I now have to live with every moment of my existence. My son was dead. They found him at the bottom of a four meter hole in a fetal position. Left there two hours...how can they ever justify that ? I live directly across the road from the school and not once have I had any support from them. Not once have I had an apology....because to say sorry would be to admit guilt. So I am left here alone to pick up the pieces of my now very broken life. I miss Joshua more than I could ever express. I didn't only lose a son that day but I lost my best friend. Joshua is only as far away from me as my next heartbeat. I see him everywhere in other children, in the clothes they wear and the music they listen to. A big part of me died with him on Valentines Day. He has left behind a little brother who looked up to him in every way. A family that will never be complete again. I just hope I can honor Joshua's memory in each thing I do for his little brother. I will try to keep Joshua's memory alive through my website here and other things I am doing at the moment to save other children from such an avoidable death. So thank you all for letting me share my story with you and if I may, I will leave you with something to think about. The little things just don't matter. Love your children unconditionally, they are just so precious and so fragile.
I love you Josh!!!!!!
Here is where Joshua will rest for eternity, So rest in peace, my "Special Rainbow Child" We all miss you so very much but you will live on in our hearts and memories forever.
I Love You, MUM XX







Susie...Thank you so much for this beautiful gift!!





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