Since the moment that Kyle told me the result of the pregnancy test, I have been waiting expectantly for the baby to move.* I have been combing internet sites and talking to mothers, trying to understand what it really feels like. Most sites describe it as butterfly flutters or bubbles. So far, I have felt none of these things. Instead, I noticed an a vague churning or swirling feeling. The first time I noticed it was January 30, when I was almost 16 weeks along. (To be honest, it kind of freaked me out; it reminded me of the movie Alien.) During the next week, I felt a similar churning sort of pressure three more times. I described the feeling to the doctor, and she confirmed that I was probably feeling the baby move.
As the last few weeks have passed, I have had the churning feeling with greater frequency and intensity, leaving no doubt that it is the baby doing somersaults. I also feel a sharper feeling--like I am being poked on the inside. It seems the baby does not like stairs, because I have felt it move while I am walking up the stairs at least 4 times. Also, the baby does not like it when Kyle tickles me. (He may believe the baby loves it, but he is wrong!) I think the baby likes my clarinet playing, though, because it moves more on mornings when I am practicing. Either that, or I am waking it up. Incidently,I am still amused by the novelty of being kicked from the inside, so I tell pretty much anyone when the baby moves. I'm sure most people are getting sick of it, except for Kyle--he has to be interested, since it's his offspring.
For the last two weeks or so, I have been able to find where the baby is by finding the harder spot on my belly. Last Tuesday, while Kyle and I were on the couch, I found the baby and put Kyle's hand on the spot, saying "Hey, that's your son!" As soon as Kyle put his hand there, the baby started wriggling more than I have felt it before! It was like the baby was saying "Hi Daddy!" Unfortunately, the baby is still so small that Kyle couldn't feel it moving. Kyle can recognize that the baby is there by the harder spot, but it isn't kicking him yet. Hopefully it will soon. It's supposed to be another 5-10 weeks before it starts kicking so obviously.
*Not quite true. The first half hour was spent alternating between hysterical crying and laughing. The next half-hour involved me feeling guilty for drinking caffiene. The third hour left me regretting that I hadn't finished my can of caffienated Dr. Pepper before the pregnancy test, leaving a half-empty can never to be finished (sigh). Anyway, by about the third or fourth hour, I started wondering when the baby would move and what it would feel like.
February 18, 2005: A Weighty Issue
I would like to express my frustration with a certain aspect of pregnancy--the weight gain. In the past 10 weeks or so, I've been slowly gaining weight. This is to be expected. Luckily, I'm eating more healthfully than I ever have in my adult life, and I am gaining weight in an appropriate amount. I think my body may have gone into shock from all the fresh vegetables and calcium.
Here is the problem: I can usually reassure myself (with Kyle's help) that all this weight gain is natural and healthy, except when I am talking to a few nice, well-meaning people. Apparently, since I'm pregnant, it has become appropriate to talk about where I'm gaining weight, and how much. Supposedly, this can predict gender--except no one can agree where I am gaining weight. According to my sources, it's everywhere. Here are a sampling of the comments: "It looks like you're gaining weight low, so it's a boy." "Your face is getting rounder, so it must be a boy." "You're carrying high, so it's probably a girl." "Your thighs are looking bigger, so it must be a boy." The thigh comment bothered me the most. But for some reason, the all-purpose comment, "You're looking bigger," doesn't bother me at all.
When I get my body back,
I think I'll do a shot of Jack.
Then I'll drink a Diet Coke,
And even though I do not smoke,
I think I'll have a cigarette.*
(But don't think I'm finished yet.)
For under this maternal guise,
I'm longing for some fresh french fries,
Hot dogs, Junk food, a can of beer.
When will the due date finally appear???
