Everything
to Everyone:
Written
by - Linda H.
Dedicated
to - Lin P.
Everything to Everyone - by Everclear
you put yourself in stupid places
yes i think you know it's true
situations where it's easy to look down on you
i think you like to be the victim
i think you like to be in pain
i think you make yourself a victim
almost every single day
you do what you do
you say what you say
you try to be everything to everyone
you know all the right people
you play all the right games
you always try to be
everything to everyone
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Everything to Everyone:
I'm the White Knight.
Thats what Marcus called me. Guess
thats what I am. You see, I have this
compulsion to always save the day, thats why I wanted to be a cop. But thats NOT reality. I fail a lot and when
I do, it is like the end of the world to me.
Starsky, well that's another matter altogether. Ever hear the phrase, "I would walk
through fire for you?" Well, that
pretty much sums up how I feel about my partner. Anything and everything are his, all he has to do is ask.
I've seen too many dark things on the streets, and it's
getting harder to shake it off. I try,
I really do, but it keeps dragging me down.
So I drink.. a lot, sometimes. I
try to hide it from my partner, but he knows. Hell, he can tell when he comes by
to get me in the morning, and I look and feel like shit. But he doesn't say a word to me, guess he
figures I'll somehow work through it, come out the other side. Buddy, if you didn't need me like you do, I
never would. Come out the other side, that is.
I would stay right here in my misery, drink myself into oblivion. Who would care anyway?
I see you looking at me, wondering when the hell I'm going
to snap out of this. My biggest fear is
letting you down, Starsk. Am I doing
that already, I wonder?
I find a cardboard box and start walking around my
apartment, gathering up the empty bottles of whiskey and the cans of beer,
pouring everything else down the drain. I take a hot shower, scrub my skin
until it's nearly raw.
Someone is knocking at the door. I know its you. Just as I
know you will take the key from the ledge and let yourself in. You're looking at me now. Guess you can see right through me.
"Walk away Starsk, don't look back," I want to scream. But you come and sit beside me, and put your
arms around me. And we sit there, until hot tears start to fall from my eyes,
and still you hold on.
I fear that I will shatter into a million pieces if you ever
let me go. God but I need to get away, but not from you, never from you.
And you understand like always. You get up and phone Dobey, I hear you telling him we need some
time off. I get dressed as you throw
some clothes into a bag, and we head out the door. I really don't care where we go.
Just get me away from where I am..from what I am becoming. Help me to find myself again. I know it's a lot to ask of you buddy, but
I'm begging here. You reach over and
squeeze my leg, a sign... you'll make it better, and so then I let it go. I trust you to find the solution, the way
out. You save the day Starsk, because
this White Knight has fallen off of his horse.
Finis
*authors note - Thanks to Paula Wilshe for her beta reading efforts.