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| August 9th, 2005 |
Dear Praying Friends, Praise God that He is in control of all things! It is such a comfort to know that indeed, my God loves me and none of the difficulties we have encountered has slipped by Him unknowingly, but rather it is all part of His plan. Many things have changed since my last update. While I was hoping the scan would demonstrate that God had done a mighty work in my body, unfortunately it clearly demonstrates that the disease has continued to progress in all areas. I am not giving up on the hope that He may yet touch my body and heal me, but it is clear that He has not done it as of now. Please do not stop praying! After a lot of prayerful consideration, I have also changed my treatment path and have decided not to take any further chemotherapy treatments. The chemo was very debilitating to me and I felt it was not something I wanted to do any longer. I found I was large amount of time in bed due to increasing lethargy and suffering much more because of the pain caused by the chemo itself. It also was damaging my blood to the extent that I had to have transfusions, and injections of substances to rapidly build cells, but this process is painful as well. If they had promised even a hope of a cure or remission, I might have continued, but I simply don’t want what remaining days I have to be filled with shots, IVs, blood work, appointments, doctors, etc. There is something in my mind that finds suffering from an uninvited disease understandable, but suffering as a result of choosing to do so to treat a disease, well, I don’t find that acceptable. While it is difficult for Larry to see me make this choice, he understands and is supportive of this decision. As a result of this decision, I have found a good general medicine doctor who will oversee my care and treat my symptoms as they develop. I am very happy with this decision and feel now that I am free to live my life; instead of simply existing through my life as I was doing when on the chemotherapy. God continues to be faithful each step of the way, and He has proven Himself to be trustworthy. I know that I am not alone, and He will not let me down. I am making plans to spend some special time with family and loved ones, and do some of the things I have always wanted to do. For example, I will be able to go to my Uncle Pete’s 80th birthday party next week. Larry and I will be celebrating our 8th anniversary on the 15th, and a generous and gracious member of the little church we often attend has offered to give us a couple nights in a luxury hotel on the beach. My dad, who was so sick last year that we never thought he would survive will be turning 85 on Aug 16th. I am delighted that I will be able to participate in such memorial family events. PRAYER REQUESTS: Please continue to keep our family in your prayers. Our most urgent prayer need now is for South African Airlines to work with us in changing our non-refundable tickets. We were planning to return to Malawi on August 16th. Please pray that we will not lose these tickets and that Larry and Carey will not have to purchase additional ones to return to Malawi. Please pray as we go through this new and uncharted territory that we will feel God's presence in a very real way. We wish God’s grace and blessings on each of you. Words fail to express how much strength and hope we find from your prayers. |