The beautiful, grand stone walls were covered with dark green silk drapes and family portraits framed in ebony notched with silver. The winding stairways that led up to other rooms were ebony also; silver vines entwined the hansdomely carved banisters. The carpet was dark green velvet, and the candelabras hanging from the ceiling, the walls, and placed on the sideboards were silver snakes with emeralds placed as eyes. James would have been shocked to see this place and would have left. Lily felt right at home.
Lucius took her arm.
"C'mon. I'm showing you your room. This way." He led her up the right-hand curving stairway and stopped at the second landing.
This landing opened into a large hallway, with green velvet covering the floor and different designs notched in silver on the doors, framing the sides. Three doors away from the large window at the end of the hall, Lucius stopped and handed Lily her trunk. He pulled a door to his left open and pulled the trunk inside.
"This is your room...I'd say better no unpack till we're sure that you're gonna be staying here, but you can go ahead and take off the sweater." He left and closed the door quietly, leaving Lily to stare about her new residence.
It somehow reminded her of her Hogwarts dormitory; circular, with a four-poster across from the door and an large window. It was much more grand than anything at Hogwarts, though, much more greener and more silver; much darker than the school had been. Lily's eyes sparkled mischievously.
Lily grinned widely as she saw the beautiful view from the window; several handsome hedges shaped to form a sort of maze in snake-form. The lawns were darker than was usual, and they were bordered by a neatly kept sort of forest; not as dark or as dangerous as the Forbidden one at Hogwarts, but nevertheless a forest. Lily bit her bottom lip in excitement, closed the large window she had been staring out of, and threw open her trunk.
Sick and tired of the Hogwarts robes, she searched for something fitting for the warm but not hot atmosphere of the mansion. Wrinkling her nose, she found that the only things the house-elves had washed were the bluejeans and green shirt Eva had made her put on over the Easter holidays. Shaking her head and fumbling around for some darker, clean things, she finally had to resort to those clothes. Just as she was tying her hair back in a braid, Severus knocked at the door.
"Lily?"
"Hum? That is-who is it?"
Severus pushed the door open. "It's me. You all right?"
"Sure-why shouldn't I be?"
"No reason." He shut the door and moved into the room, sitting next to the gangly form on the bed. "Lily?"
"Mmm?" She had given up on the braid and was trying a braided bun, and for the first time in over a year, she was fussing with hairpins. Right now they were in her mouth, and her arms were aching from being held up over her head for so long.
"Remember what I told you at King's Cross?"
"Mmmph ummph. Thwat I phooldn't pell Wucius' pawents I'm a Wuggle."
"That you what?"
Lily removed the pins from her mouth. "That I shouldn't tell Lucius' parent's I'm a Muggle. Or Muggle-born, whatever. I was going to ask you about that, anyway. Why not?"
Severus shrugged, but it wasn't an "I don't care" shrug; more of a nervous twitch. "They-Lily, they don’t especially like Muggles."
"I'm a witch."
"I know, but-well, I didn't especially like them either. To tell ya the truth, you're the only one I like."
"Is that supposed to be a compliment?"
"Kinda sorta maybe I don't know. But I'd do all I can to keep them from finding out. See-well, one of their friends had a Muggle father, and the dad left his mom and kid when he found out that the mom was a witch. And them the mom died, and the kid grew up in an orphanage, and-well, the people there were terrible to him. So people like that are partly what makes Lucius' parents hate Muggles."
"Partly?"
"Well-yeah, they think Muggles are so inferior to them…and in a roundabout way they are-refusing to believe in anything they can't see-oh well. Promise you won't tell his parents?"
Lily had something else on her mind. "Severus?"
"Huh?"
"What was that orphan's name?"
"Oh-I'm not sure-see, they've been out of touch for a long time-they say he went to Albania or something to live with his mum's folks."
"I see."
Lily fingered a loose strand of hair. "And what if Tom finds out I'm Muggle-born?"
She didn't say this aloud, but she thought it so loudly she wondered that Severus couldn't hear the echoes inside her head.
The evening quickly turned chilly, and, thanking and re-thanking Severus for the cloak he'd given her, Lily pulled it out of her trunk and spent a comfortable evening in the library, which was twice as large as the one at Hogwarts, twice as comfortable, and about twenty-six times more beautiful. The bookshelves, thousands upon thousands, weren't all ebony, but they were painted a beautiful midnight black with green velvet cushions on the shelves so that the old books that the Malfoy family owned wouldn't get banged up by the wooden shelf-edges.
The fire was in a fireplace seven feet wide and about six feet high; an elaborately carved mantlepiece of ebony splashed with silver and emeralds hung over it, supporting two large but delicate candelabras. The large couch was dark green with a silvery shine and carved legs. Fifteen feet long, it provided a comfortable place for about seven people to sprawl on. The rug in front of the fireplace, almost thirty feet square, was the house's traditional silver and green, with a pattern of serpents woven into the shimmering threads. Four other armchairs, made in the same fashion as the sofa, surrounded the average-sized table in the center and made a quaint little circle. And around the chairs the walls of the book-cases loomed high, lit at intervals of about five feet by a candelabra, on a stand about four feet in the air. It was a sort of welcoming atmosphere to Lily, but she knew Petunia would run screaming out of the mansion at the sight of all the 'scary snakies and the darkie places'.
The next morning, Mr. Malfoy got in touch with the Ministry of Magic and asked them to contact Lily's family for them, since repeated efforts of theirs had been fruitless. And around five, an answer came by owl, addressed to Lily.
Dear Miss Evans,
We have located your parents and are pleased to enclose a letter from them. You have their permission to stay at Mr. Malfoy's for the rest of the summer.
The enclosure read:
Lily, dear,
I know how worried you must have been when we didn't show up to pick you up. Truth is, it went straight clean out of my head. I might as well tell you this now-your mother's sick. Not headache-sick, but double pneumonia sick. On top of that, she was visiting someone who had another guest: a lady with a daughter with typhoid and we don't know if she has that, too. Petunia's out of the house, and you're doing the same until your mother gets well. I love you, doll, and you've got free license to spend what ever you want in Diagon Alley or anywhere else. I'm enclosing the key to your vault.
I wish I could say all I want to, but it would scare you right out of your senses. Your mother is. Out of her senses, I mean. The whole delirious thing. Well-all I want to say is be good and don't come home on pain of death. Seriously.
I love you, and your mother would send her love if she knew I was writing to you,
Dad
Lily looked up from her letter, released her freely bleeding lip, and nodded slowly. Severus looked over, curiously.
"Lily, what is it?"
She handed him the letter wordlessly, not even bothering to wipe the trickle of blood away from her chin. Severus skimmed through it, reached into the bottom of the envelope, took out the small golden key, and turned to Lily.
"Burn?"
Lily, eyes strained and almost all white, nodded her head in small jerks. Severus pushed the letters and envelope into the fire and pulled out a tissue, wiping her face off. She didn't move, and he put an arm around the cold marble statue for comfort, but the only thing about her that moved when he did so was the long red hair that settled against the back of the couch.
A door behind them creaked, but neither of them looked up till Lucius' voice came from directly behind them.
"Severus, you nuts?"
Severus jumped up, pulling his arm away.
"Lucius, long story. Not now, though."
Lucius frowned. "All right, then, fine, if you don't want to tell me. But our parents're taking us out to eat at that Japanese restaurant in Fraeden Square. You two want to get ready?"
Severus leaned down to Lily and gently shook her shoulders. She snapped out of her trance with a start.
"Lily?"
She spoke in a dry, dead, hardened voice. "What?"
"You need to eat something. Come on; we're going out with Lucius' parents."
Like a baby, Lily allowed herself to be lifted and led out of the library.
He led her to her room, opened a closet, and pulled out a dark dress, rather formal, which he laid across knees.
"Lily, c'mon. You'll be all right. She isn't dead, is she? Well then. It'll be all right. Trust me." Hesitating a bit, he leaned over and gave her a quick hug, then quickly left the room.
Lily heard the door close, and, as if in a dream, she stood up and changed into the long dress. Black, it went up to her throat and down to her feet, trailing a bit. It reached down to her wrists, with bits of black lace scattered about her neck, wrists, and hem. Her hair had been slowly turning darker over the last year, and it was no longer a rusty orange, but a reddish-orange, and, combed and scattered about her shoulders, it would have made her beautiful. Except for one thing.
No woman, ever, had an expression on her face like Lily did then. In the space of fifteen minutes, the life had gone out of her face and she was left with a colorless, white face. Litharelen had a moonshine tinge to her skin, but Lily's face could have been shaded with Professor McGonagall's board chalk. The skin about her cheeks was drawn, and shadows under her eyes were prominent. Almost unnaturally, her eyebrows cut vivid lines in her forehead, and her lips were pale and cracked, bleeding in several places. The usually alive, deep, forest green mirrors that served her as eyes were now dead, almost black; the green tinge had vanished almost completely. Her eyes were, as usual, rimmed with the bristly dark lashes with a tilt to them at the ends, but, now more than ever contrasting so sharply with the red of her hair, they didn't accent her eyes; they imprisoned them behind bars.
She noticed vaguely that the dress she was wearing was terribly like a mourning dress, but she pushed that fact out of her mind, and went downstairs, sitting down across from where Severus and Lucius were standing, as far away from any sort of light as possible.
The boys had noticed her as she came down, but they were a bit too amazed to move. The black dress draped about her, giving her the look of a Greek statue, and her red locks draped around her, forming the only jewelry she needed. But, pretty as she could have been, she was the perfect image of pain, with her knuckles white as she clenched the folds of her dress in one hand and the paleness of her face. Almost ghostly, she half-impressed, half frightened the two boys as they stood next to the banister. Severus had just finished telling Lucius what happened, and both of them moved over quickly.
"Lily?"
"Ssht. She's not all right-not yet. Lily, anything we can do for you-"
She spoke as if from a dead person's throat, but politely. "No, thank you. I'm quite all right." She turned away, against the wall.
"You're not all right. Don’t try that. But, Lily, as long as you need anyone, we're here for you."
Unwillingly, Severus gave a small gasp as Lily turned her face towards him. The bones of her skull were stretching through her cheeks, and she seemed several inches away from death. He could see the hollows in the bone where her eyes were and the bone that formed her jaw. But a rustling made him turn away.
"Severus? Lucius? Lily? We're ready. Are you coming?"
Severus lifted Lily to her feet and helped her towards Lucius' mother, clothed in a spring-blue, off-the-shoulder gown with a long dark blue cloak around her shoulders. Fair hair dressed up off of her shoulders and accented with a silver tiara, she appeared the very picture of all that was perfect. But she quickly took in Lily's state, recognized the mouthings "Her mother" from Lucius, and immediately sank to her knees and gathered the small twelve-year-old in a large hug. Lily felt something inside of her snap, and, though she didn't start to cry, she wrapped her arms around the comforting person that seemed to understand everything.
When they arrived at the restaurant, even in her detached state, Lily couldn't help but wonder at the beautiful surroundings. The ceiling was covered with black velvet and dotted everywhere with stars, and the carpet was a thick scarlet. The entrance portals were guarded by two stone dragons, and the walls at either side of the gold-enscribed door were huge fish tanks, with coral reefs and water plants and tropical fish swimming around. The waitress that greeted them was dressed in an immaculate kimono, scarlet, embroidered all over with gold thread. Her hair was gathered away from her face and pulled back in a sort of rope-like twist, and through it she had put black chopsticks with gold lettering on them. And the table she led them to, after bowing low, was almost breathtaking.
If Lily hadn't seen the Malfoy's mansion and Eva's house beforehand, she would have been breathless. It was an enclosed booth; the walls were draped with painted silk scrolls and red silk curtains-the ceiling was the same black with stars. The table was covered with a creamy white cloth placed over a scarlet one, and the scarlet showed through. The plates on the table were fine china with blue paintings done by hand, and the chopsticks lying next to every place were of the same china with blue characters on it. The cup for tea was of the same eggshell-like china, as was the beautiful steaming teapot in the center. Rather nervous, and praying she wouldn't break anything, Lily took her place between the two boys. They helped her order, and once the waitress had brought hot, but not too hot soup and given each person a small bowl, they started to talk. Mrs. Malfoy was smiling slightly.
"So, Lily, you like this place?"
"Do I like this place? It's-it's-I don't know what to say. It's amazing!"
She nodded. "It's one of the most expensive places in the Alley maze. And you can obviously see why!"
"Of course I can-wait-the Alley maze?"
Mrs. Malfoy frowned slightly. "Well, Diagon Alley, Knockturn Alley, Fraeden Square, Madraiden Place, Firestream Lane…well, you know. At least, you should."
"Oh, that." Lily nodded quickly and swallowed the rest of her soup. "Of course I know about them. It's just-it's just that my family calls them the Alley Divisions." Quickly shooting a questioning and half-frightened glance at Severus and Lucius to see if her cover had gone over well, she received two relieved approbations. She breathed more normally and picked up her chopsticks for the well-seasoned steamed rice.
They left the restaurant an hour and a half later, and Lily had been terribly thankful when she saw the bill and knew that Mr. Malfoy was paying for her. Fifty Galleons per person! Yeah, it was the most expensive restaurant around here!
When they got back home, Lily quickly changed into her black nightgown and slipped between the comforters. Someone had graciously slipped a hot-water bottle between the blankets, so she warmed up quickly after the chilly night air. Then her thoughts drifted back to her mother. Her first memory of her…they were sitting on a balcony, and her mother was doing her hair. She had seen one of her friends down in the street and had jumped up, making her mother yank her hair.
The day she got her letter for Hogwarts.
Her last birthday and the cake her mother baked.
The smiles on her mother's face when Lily stepped off of the train.
Her mother, sitting in an armchair, crocheting a tiny sweater for that baby that never came.
Buying her fencing equipment. Taking her to practice. Watching Gone with the Wind and drinking hot cocoa with a touch of hazelnut. Reading Agatha Christie books and eating pretzels. Picking wildflowers in the field just beyond that building site near their house. Riding the horses that were at the nearby college's equitation stables. Shopping for dishes after Lily had broken the old set. Doing…oh, hundreds of things, hundreds of things Lily seriously doubted she would ever do again. She fell asleep, and if anyone had come in, they would have been crying at the pained expression her face held even in her sleep.
The next morning, Severus walked into the room first. He drew aside the curtains at the window and then at the four-poster, knowing that if she were left alone she'd torture herself with thoughts of her mother.
"Lily! Wake up!"
She shot straight up in bed. "Huh? What? Oh, it's you. Hi." She flopped back onto her pillow.
"Come on! We're going to Diagon Alley today. Fortescue's got some new ice cream in. Wonderful day outside. Practically seventy degrees already, and it isn't ten yet. Come on, outta bed!" He pulled the covers off of her, and, expecting to shiver, she pulled her nightgown over her feet.
"Wh-Whoa! It really is seventy degrees outside!" She pulled the nightgown off of her arms, where it clung to her skin damply.
"'Course it is. You up for ice cream?"
Lily shrugged. "Sure, whatever. Go away."
"'Scuse you?"
"If you want me to go for ice cream, you'd better expect me to go there dressed. And I'm not changing in front of you. Go away."
"Oh, come on, why not? I think Lucius has an old ducky bathrobe you can wear-"
"SEVERUS YOU WERE TO KEEP SHUT ABOUT THAT BATHROBE!"
"I told you he did. Whatcha gonna wear?"
"Oh…" Lily shrugged and slipped off of the mattress. "Anything that's clean."
"Have it your way. You might want to wear something that's cool, though, because it's gonna be hot as-as-"
"As what?"
"As your temper. Come on. I'm leaving, you get dressed." He suited the action to the word and left her to do the same.
She did so, quickly, in a black shirt; short-sleeved, and long dark pants. Lily wasn't feeling up to dressing brightly after she had received the news about her mother, so she picked out her darkest things, took off every bit of jewelry, and let her hair hang the way it had the other night. When she inspected her face in the mirror, it was still white and drawn, and her cheekbones were more prominent than ever. She hadn't cried yet, thinking with an absurd self-made superstition that if she did, her mother would die. Keeping back her tears took no effort at all, surprisingly, and, after turning away from the mirror abruptly, she took her purse out of her trunk and walked downstairs.
Severus and Lucius were waiting for her there. Thankfully, they showed no sign of surprise at the way she looked, which was, to say the least, terrible. Severus simply took her arm, which was shaking slightly, and escorted her to the great fire to the left of the stairways. He took a pinch of green powder from a silver basin, threw it into the roaring flames, which turned a sickly green, and stepped inside, shouting, "Diagon Alley!" and pulling Lily along with him.
"Close your eyes!" was the last thing Lily heard before they were caught in a whirlwind of soot, and when she opened them, the world had stopped spinning and she was standing inside the fireplace of a room she had seen once before; the main room of the Leaky Cauldron, and she caught glimpses of faces she knew all too well but was too strained to recognize.
Sirius, James, Peter, and Remus were sitting at a table, counting money and comparing purchases. Their eyes, along with Miranda's, Ashley's, and John's, who were sitting nearby, widened in a sort of horror when they saw Lily and Severus materialize, and Lily hanging onto his arm with a dead white face and for dear life.
James jumped up first. "Lily, are you mad! What're you doing with him?"
His voice reached her faintly, and she turned the saddest eyes he had ever seen on him. The hurt in her expression was as hard to miss as the fact that the universe existed, and it froze James in the stance he was in, half out of his chair.
The skin on her face was so thin and taut, it seemed that if one touched it with a knife, it would snap away in different directions. Her jaw was set, and those eyes-those eyes. They had summoned all of the pain anyone on the world had ever felt, emotional and physical, and stored them inside those two small orbs. He had never seen a sight like that before, and it was only when Severus steered her out of the back door and had shut it that he sprang to life.
"What-what was wrong with her? Sirius, you saw-you saw her! What's he doing to her?"
Sirius had drawn inside himself, and his voice came out thickly. "I-don't-know-"
"Well, if it's Snape that's making her--" He jumped up and Sirius had to catch him, and even then he needed Remus' assistance.
"James-it's not Snape. No kid could make her feel that way-I don't think-I don't think you want to interfere."
James was still straining, but at those words he turned around and faced Sirius squarely. "What do you mean?"
"I wish I knew. I wish I knew."
The next time James saw Lily, she was absent-mindedly drinking a cup of strong coffee, and the circles under her eyes were starting to grow more lavender, and had addend wrinkles. He didn't stop, but went right on inside the Quidditch store. Severus noticed him, even if Lily didn't.
"Lily?"
She didn't move, but Severus knew she had heard him.
"Lily, I don't know what it is about him. He keeps showing up wherever you are-keeps attacking me or trying to whenever I'm with you-" His voice trailed off.
"I know. I've wondered about that, too." Her voice was so drawn-out that every word was spoken after an interval of five seconds.
That evening, she undressed and got into her nightgown, remembering the last time she'd seen James. He was coming out of a shop she was going into, and he just stared at her. A blank stare; nothing else. After they had stopped up the doorway for about thirty seconds, someone roughly pushed Lily inside, and she fell, skinning her palms on the carpet. James had made a move to go inside after her, but the crowd had forced him back onto the street.
Opening the trunk to get her brush out, Lily came across the tiny casket that held the elf-nymph necklace. She hesitated a bit, but then pulled it out and knocked it against the wall, clutching the chain tightly in her fist.
Lily landed softly in a large wave, and, spitting out mouthfuls of the water, she climbed onto dry land.
It was night, and the stars twinkled in the heavens like the glimmers on the water's surface. Shivering slightly, she jumped as a form jumped out from behind a rock.
"Lily?"
"Tom?"
"Yeah, it's me. We've been waiting for you-"
"What for?"
"Long story. I need your help."
Lily was a bit stunned. "My help? I'm only thirteen-what-?"
"I'll explain. Come." He took her hand and led her behind the rocky cave that had sheltered him. They sat down on two raised rocks, and Tom pulled out a book, flipping to a page somewhere in the middle.
"See this?" He handed the book to her, pointing to the right-hand page.
"Traummacht Potion. What about it?"
"I found this book of my mother's, and she spelled it so it can only be opened by doing this spell and drenching the book in this potion. Weird, I know, but-"
"But what?"
"But I don't have all the ingredients."
She was a bit confused. "Where do I come in?"
"I'd like to ask you if you can get them for me."
"What-But Hogwarts' closed over the summer. You'll have to wait."
"I can't. The book stays permanently shut if I don't open it within a month of finding the book. It's been two weeks."
"So-so what do you want me to do?"
He looked at her. "You don't suppose you've already guessed? I need you-you're small, you're young, and no one would arrest you for it."
Lily's smile twinkled. "When do I start?"
She returned to the Malfoy's a few minutes later, with a few hurried instructions. The first thing that caught her eye when she landed on the bed was an owl, large and tawny, with a letter clamped in its beak. With shaking hands, she tore the envelope open and pulled one of two sheets of parchment out.
Dear Miss Evans,
We regret to inform you that you mother has passed away. We offer our sincerest sympathies to you and your family. If you have any requests or questions, please write to the Ministry of Magic, Department 226.
Peter Bartlett, Head of Department 226.
Lily was already sitting, and that was a good thing, for her knees would have buckled. As it was, her eyes simply widened, her lips grew a shocked almost transparent, as she was pressing them together so hard, and her complexion paled even more, if that was at all possible, and the circles around her eyes quickly deepened to a dark purple. She shed no tear; she simply reached inside the envelope and pulled the other sheet out with badly shaking hands.
Lily, dear,
The Ministry wrote to you to tell you-but I want you to know something. Your mother passed away quietly; she was in no pain and she was conscious at the end. Love, her last words were, "I love you, Lil dear." I can't write much anymore-except that her funeral's going to be three weeks from now. She already bought your birthday present-I'll send it along with some of the things she wanted you to have. I can't write anymore-only please don't come home immediately. I need to be alone for a bit.
Love, Dad.
Lily dropped back onto the bed. She didn't move for the rest of the night, and she didn't shed a single tear. But when Severus came in next morning at around nine, he ran for Mrs. Malfoy. From his jumbled message she could only understand a few words-"Lily-dead-terrible-come see!", but she nevertheless raced to Lily's room and stopped short when she saw the limp figure on the bed.
