He cut her off. “Never mind. I follow your general idea. So-what is this place?” He looked around with interest written all over his face.
Lily felt a strong urge to slap him. “The Alendoren Cove,” she told him with as much venom in her voice as was possible.
“The who?”
“Alendoren Cove. Why’d you follow me here?”
He shrugged. “I figured you were in trouble. Or wherever you were going was dangerous. Now-who’re you meeting down here?”
Lily scowled. “I really do hate you, Potter. Stay here.” She set off in the opposite direction of Tom’s cave, but the next sentence out of James’ mouth forced her to stop.
“Isn’t where you want to go this way?” He pointed directly towards the cave, and Lily let out a small shriek of rage.
“So you’ve followed me here before, have you?”
“Nope.” He shrugged. “It’s just that you’re too smart to go directly towards where you intend to end up at, and I happen to know that, so it’s a pretty safe guess to say that you’re going wherever the opposite direction is.”
Lily scowled. “Fine! Fine, fine! But if you breathe a word about this place to anyone, I will personally yank your intestines out through your nose.”
“I should think that’s physically impossible.”
Eyebrow raised, Lily stemmed her fists in her side. “Oh, trust me, I will find a way.”
He followed her down the beach. “You know, knowing you, you probably would.”
They reached Tom’s quarters relatively quickly, and Lily stepped forward, kicking James in the shin every time he made a noise. Peering inside the half-gloom, Lily could make out two figures talking in the back of the cave. She harrumphed loudly.
“Hullo?”
Tom jumped up. “Lily! Welcome back…oh, and who is this?” he asked, pointing at James. Lily stepped on James’ foot as he opened his mouth.
“It’s a friend of mine-he was determined to find out wherever I was going, and, well, he obviously did. I came tonight to tell you that I won’t be back for quite some time-it’s getting a bit too risky.”
Tom nodded, throwing Lily a thankful glance. She smiled back at him.
”This is James. James, meet Tom and-“ she gestured to the noble figure appearing next to Tom-“Litharelen de Forneque. They’re very good friends of mine-and they’re engaged,” she added.
“Oh.” James was a bit puzzled, but he held out his hand. “Pleased to meet you. And congratulations.”
“Thank you.” Litharelen smiled as she led them towards the back of the cave. “Have something to drink?”
James declined, but Lily accepted gratefully. As she gulped down the small glass of litaleter, her eyes roved over the cave, in search of the pentacorn. Lily set down the glass and ran a hand over her mouth.
“Lith, where’s Svordsja?”
Litharelen smiled. “I think she’s outside, roaming. Want me to call her?”
Lily shook her head. “I’ll do that, thanks. Can I let James meet her?”
Tom grinned. “Sure.”
When they were outside, Lily grabbed James’ collar and shoved him against the nearest boulder.
“I want you to understand several things while we’re here. One: if you tell Tom I am Muggle-born, I will get out my thumbscrews. Two: if you mention how we got here, we are both dead. You will be because I will have killed you; I will be because Tom wants this necklace to gain ultimate power. Understood?”
James nodded weakly, and she released him. “Good. So…” her eyes roved over the beach and came to rest on his face-“want to meet Svordsja?”
He frowned. “Who?”
Lily laughed, it seemed to him to be the first time in ages. She bit her bottom lip and let out a smooth, low whistle, and immediately afterwards, the ground seemed to shake as the most magnificent creature he had ever seen galloped towards them. Lily laughed again as she swung herself onto its back and looked down at him.
“This, my friend,” she said, patting the pentacorn’s neck-“is Svordsja. Like a ride?”
James stuttered a bit. “I’ve only ridden horses!”
“Well, I didn’t ride at all before Svordsja. Come on up. I’ll try not to let her throw you.”
“Gee, what a consolation. Seems to me that that’d be perfect for you.”
“Yeah,” she agreed, wrinkling her nose-“but then I’d have to clean the blood spatters off of my robes. Stand over there,” Lily tossed her head, pointing to a rock about a foot away from the sands,
She maneuvered the pentacorn to where James was standing. Svordsja shied several times, and reared dangerously when James accidentally pulled her mane, but he got on top of her back, behind Lily, without being thrown. He came close to it, however, when Lily bent down, whispering several soft words in the pentacorn’s ear, and Svordsja set off, thundering over the rolling tide.
He grabbed her around the waist; he was more used to a saddle and bridle. “Have you ever been thrown off?”
She laughed in the wind as she caught his words. “No. Never. Svordsja likes me-don’t you, magnificent?”
He gave a sudden groan or gasp as Svordsja cleared a seven-feet-high jutting boulder in one jump, and almost pulled Lily off with him. She lightly swatted at his hands.
“If you’re going to fall off, kindly leave me on!”
“I’ll try. He loosened his hold, but didn’t let go. “So, how’d you first come here?”
She smiled as the foam from two clashing waves hit her full in the face. “Accident.”
“Accident?”
“Well, it was. I only saw Lith the first time, then I saw Tom about the third time I landed here. By the way, since this is your first time here, I think your body’s going to be passed out on the common room floor. Mine has lately been coming here with me; it didn’t do that before. But I don’t know how it is for you.”
“Me neither. Lil, this is actually kinda fun!”
She laughed again. “Why do you think I do it?”
“I don’t know.” She could feel him shrug. “The fact that you could be killed?”
“Well, that, too,” she admitted. “We’d better be going,” Lily added. “It’s almost one in the morning at Hogwarts.”
“How do you know?”
“It’s this wonderful creation called a watch.”
”Oh". He looked a bit foolish for a moment, but then smiled. “All right. You think we can do this again anytime soon?”
Lily grinned. “That depends on you.”
“Depends on me?” He was a bit confused.
She smiled. “Yes, depends on you. Depends on whether or not you’re able of keeping a secret from your special friends. And, of course, anyone else who just happens to meander around-“
He cut her off. “All right, all right! I promised I’d keep whatever this was to myself, didn’t I?”
“Yeah, but-well, this is you.”
“I meant it. OUCH!”
Lily couldn’t help but laugh. She had steered Svordsja right into a crashing wave, and it seemed that James had been hit in the face. “You all right?”
“Well, besides the fact that I’m missing a jaw now, yeah!”
Lily tossed her hair, smacking him in the face. “Good. Then I don’t have to worry about any dumb funeral arrangements. Anyway, we’re going back.” She turned Svordsja around; back towards the cave, deftly guiding her mount over the jutting boulders that had taken their place in the swirling watery, dewy sea. She did have one scare, however; once, James came extremely close to sliding off, and he had to hold on to her waist; hard. He made her let out a sort of gasp, and though she didn’t slip off, when she got her breath back and had seen him jump to the ground in front of the cave, she sat sidesaddle on the pentacorn’s back, glaring at him.
“You do that again, mister, and I’ll make a soprano out of you!”
He held out a hand for her to jump down. “And how do you intend to do that?”
”Let me demonstrate.” She did exactly as he had done; put her arms around his waist and pulled tight as hard as she could, feeling quite satisfied when he let out a strangled squeak.
“That’s what I mean when I say I’ll make a soprano out of you.” She let go, twirled around, and put a light hand on Svordsja’s neck; led her back to the cave.
When she led the pentacorn inside, Litharelen took control of the brushes. “I’ll rub her down. It’s about one-thirty your time though; you’d better head back.”
Tom hurried forward with two of the crystal glasses. “Lily, James?”
James declined again; Lily had the feeling he didn’t trust any of the food or the drink given him, but she accepted hers, needing it after James had nearly squeezed the breath out of her.
Lily nodded. “I will. Thanks, Lith. I really only came to say I might not be coming for a while is all-you understand why, don’t you?”
Tom nodded. “Yeah. Thanks, Lily.”
James frowned, but held his questions till they were far enough away.
“What’d he say ‘thanks’ for?”
Lily lightly smacked him on the back of his head. “You had already figured out enough, so if I kept this up, probably all of Hogwarts would know. Mainly because you talk to much, but still…”
“Hey!” James was indignant. “I do not talk too much!”
She sighed. “Of course you don’t. My mistake. Oops. Terribly sorry. As usual.” She stopped about fifty yards away from the cave, and quickly pulled James behind the highest piece of stone she could find.
“What’s this about?”
“Idiot. Hold onto me, tight. You don’t want to be lost in oblivion, do you?”
He shook his head. “For once, no.” Taking her around the waist again, he nodded. “Go ahead.”
Lily squared her shoulders, pulling out the necklace. She turned her head slightly. “Don’t let go; if you do, I’m not coming after you.”
“Aww, why not?”
She sniffed. “Even you should know the answer to that one.”
“I do. Well-do and did, you cold-hearted little demon.”
Lily smiled self-satisfactorily. She took the necklace in her hand and hit it, hard, against the screening rock, and a minute later they were swirling through blackness and landed back at Hogwarts, slamming hard into the carpet.
It took a moment for them to catch their breath, Lily kneeling in front of a table, her head on her arms, and James spread-eagled on the floor. Lily was the first to stand up.
“Satisfied now?”
He nodded. “Yeah. Say-how’d you get there in the first place?”
She shrugged. “I told you. It used to be that if you just stared into the necklace, it’d take you there, but then Serena did something to it, and now it only works if you hit it against something.”
James frowned. “Serena?”
“Yeah.” She shrugged again. “I was going to kill her, but then I’d have to clean up the mess.”
“I see.”
“So.” Lily turned to leave, but then she swirled back. “And you’re keeping this to yourself.”
He nodded, opening his eyes for the first time since they’d been back and jumping up. “Sure-LILY!”
“Sh!” She almost dashed over to him, clapping a hand over his mouth. “Will you shut up?”
He removed her hand with an effort. “Lily, your hair! And-my God, look at your eyes! You all right?”
“Oh.” Lily scowled. “You idiot. That’s the odd effect the Alendoren Cove’s water and the litaleter has on me. Problem with that?”
He frowned. “Well-no-but, geez, you look-well, yeah, pretty, but really odd!”
“James, shut up. I am odd. If I weren’t, well, I would just be like someone after a dementor’s kiss. And you can just keep your flattery to yourself and find someone who appreciates it. I don’t, all right?”
”Whoa, clam down!” He put an arm around her shoulders, as she sort of smirked and frowned at the same time.
“Clam down?”
“I guess. I meant calm down. Anyway, whatever works for you. Come on, don’t be so mad, not at me-I didn’t do anything!”
She folded her arms, knocking his from her shoulders. “No, you only put me through the third degree and hazarded my life by following me.”
“Hey!” He faked a hurt sniffle. “What about my life?”
She laughed. “You should have noticed by now that I care more about mine than yours. Which isn’t saying much, as I don’t care that much about mine.”
He reached back out and took her arm. “Well, I do.”
“Self-absorbed little rabbit.”
“I mean about your life.”
“Oh.”
She frowned. “Why are you telling me this?”
James shrugged. “No reason, really…I just felt like it.”
She smiled. “Good enough. Are you letting me go to bed now?”
He grinned wickedly as he held both her wrists in a tight grip. “No! No bed for you! Bad Lily!”
Lily tried to duck and spin out of his grip, but she was laughing to hard too do so, especially when he started tickling her. It took her a full five minutes to sufficiently control herself up to the point that she realized that, even though it was two in the morning, she wasn’t tired.
“James?”
“What?” He looked up expectantly.
“Are you going to bed?”
He shrugged. “I guess so.”
“All right.” She nodded. “Then I’m staying down here. Good night!” Lily twisted around and vanished up the stairs, only to return moments later with the Adventures of Robin Hood. James was still flopped over a chair.
“What was that about?”
Lily sat down, crossing her legs. “I figure that if I stay with you any longer, you’ll force me to reveal even more stuff that I really don’t want revealed.”
He grinned. “Like your undying love for Severus Snape.”
“And yours for Lucius Malfoy.”
“Hey!” He glared at her playfully. “Don’t make fun of my boyfriend, now!”
Lily couldn’t help it. She snorted loudly, giggling. “James, that was really uncalled for!”
He sighed affectedly. “I know, I know. But-“ here he snapped his head up-“it did make you laugh!”
That had been the only reason he’d said it. It wasn’t as if he really liked her any way other than being her friend-she really was impossible to be around at many times-but she hardly ever laughed lately; the only time he’d really seen her laugh was at the Alendoren Cove, when she was riding-and she did look really pretty when she laughed, he thought to himself as he glanced at the silvery strands crossing her newly-snake-shaped eyes and the long mane of hair that was down to her waist by now. But then he grinned, tossing that out of his mind.
The next morning at breakfast, the Quidditch fans were jabbering excitedly about the game, which was still on. They’d brought in lots of reserve players so far, but on Saturday the original players were supposed to be back, which gave way to a lot of wide-eyed speculation on the length of the game.
Lily kept glancing nervously over at James; she had believed him at the time he’d told her that he wouldn’t tell anyone, but that assurance was slowly fading, and the fact that he’d spilled about her father was pushing its way determinedly into her mind again and again. Finally, she caught his eye, and he gave her a small grin and a nod. It wasn’t much, but it reassured her and gave her an appetite for breakfast, which was pancakes and French toast with cinnamon sugar, at least on her plate.
That Saturday and the next, she and Amanda were alone again, having fun yawning their jaws off. Lily had just finished winning a narrow chess game (Amanda was getting much better), and finally they engaged themselves in having a Chocolate Frog fight. It was only when they were picking up shards of chocolate from the floor, laughing themselves sick, that Amanda decided to ask what had been on her mind for several days.
“Lily?”
Lily, who had just finished accidentally shoving a card into her mouth instead of the Frog, spit the cardboard out and replied with a somewhat unintelligible “Hm?”
“Lily, I-“ Amanda was looking for words. “What’s going on with you and James?”
“Huh?” This time Lily really did swallow half of the card. “Excuse me?”
“I don’t know-“ Amanda shrugged-“you’re usually smiling at each other, and I caught him passing a note to you once…”
“Oh, that.” Lily waved it away. “Nothing. Nothing at all.”
“Well, what was in the note?”
Lily noticed too late that she’d made a mistake. “That would be for me to know and you to wonder about.”
Amanda lounged across the couch. “I”ll get it out of you someday! Or, if not me, than that Snape character.”
Lily frowned. “Severus?”
“Yeah, him-he’s been glaring at James everywhere he goes, and looking at you with these really hurt expressions-Lily, that git’s got it bad.”
“Got what?”
Amanda scowled. “Lily, you are one of the densest people. Can’t you tell how much he likes you?”
Lily sighed. “Amanda, he’s nothing more than my friend,--“
“Yeah, well, he obviously isn’t satisfied with that appointment.”
Her friend groaned. “Amanda, shut it!”
Just then, they heard a tapping of a beak on the windowpane. Lily jumped up, opening it and letting the falcon-like owl in, who let its letter be untied from its leg and then perched on the mantelpiece, cocking its head to one side as it took in the room. Quickly, Lily flipped over the envelope.
“This is almost scary.”
“What?” Amanda sat up hurriedly. “To you from Snape?”
“Yeah.” She ripped it open and quickly took out the letter, unfolding it and curling up in a chair, keeping it away from Amanda, who tried in vain to read it over her shoulder.
Dear Lily,
I’m at the Quidditch game right now-well, of course you know that, but Whistler, that Italian Seeker, just wiped out the second reserve Seeker for Japan, so I’ve got a few free minutes-hey, I’d really like to talk to you. Meet me in the library common room or at the next Hogsmeade trip sometime? I’d really love to talk to you…but anyway, I guess I’ll be waiting for your answer then…
S.S.
Lily slowly let the letter sink onto her lap as Amanda’s last observations started to sink in
When the Quidditch fans returned Sunday evening, right before dinner, the match still hadn’t ended and the amount of bets on the length of it were going steadily up. The highest so far had been five years, but, well, Peter just wasn’t the brightest person around, to make it nice. Still, it was fun laughing at him, though it would have been funnier if he hadn’t only staked three Sickles.
After dinner, Lily left the Great Hall early; she had no intention of going another night without sleep, which had happened last night; Amanda had kept her awake, talking and jabbering excitedly about the letter from Severus. When she left the entrance hall and stepped off of a staircase, no sooner had she stepped off than she was whisked into an empty classroom.
“Severus?”
He turned a sort of red. “Lily, I just really wanted to talk to you.”
Lily sort of half-frowned. “All right-I suppose so. What?”
He sat down on a desk, smiling softly as she let herself fall into a chair, flicking a strand of almost auburn hair out of her eyes. “Lily, I want you to know something.”
“Yes?”
“Remember what I asked you during that Christmas party last year?”
Lily turned a sort of red as she pulled her legs up to sit Indian-style. “Yes.”
“Well-I just wanted to know if you’d reconsidered lately. I don’t want you to feel like I ‘m pressuring you at all, really-I just really like you is all.”
Lily dropped her head. Sure, he was wonderfully nice, and being who she was, she couldn’t care less if he was a Slytherin or not, but…well, for some reason some other image kept drifting across her mind. Slowly, she shook her head.
“Severus, I’m only fourteen. I can’t.”
He shrugged. “It’s not like I’m proposing marriage-“
“I know that!” She cut him off. “I’m just not ready for this. I know you don’t want to hear the ‘it’s not you, it’s me!’ thing, but…well, that’s honestly how it is.” She smiled half-apologetically. “Severus, I live half in my own little fantasy world of books and dreams and death as it is. I wouldn’t be much good to you.”
He shook his head; almost couldn’t believe it. “Lily, that’s what I like about you. You-you’re so different and interesting and-and-I don’t know what it is, but you’re one of the most amazing people I know.” Almost pleading, Severus looked straight into her eyes. Lily closed her own, trying to think of how to formulate what she had to say. Finally, she flung her eyelids open.
“Severus, since my mother died and everything with my father happened-I don’t know-it just seems like I’m not capable of feeling anything. I’ve tried to imagine my dearest friends dying many times, and it’s like I don’t care. I don’t know if I’m capable of liking anyone beyond friendship. I really don’t.” She let her lips partly cover her teeth for a minute, then told him the rest.
“Severus, I tried to replay my mother’s death and funeral last night. I didn’t cry; I didn’t anything. It was just a sort of numb feeling, like I can’t care about it. And I honestly don’t know whether I’m capable of loving anyone or anything anymore.”
Almost out of breath, she set her head down on folded arms and just sat there for a minute, only moving when she felt Severus’ hand on her shoulder.
“Lily, I’ll wait-I’d wait forever.”
They sat there in silence for a few minutes, and then Lily stood up.
“Severus, I’d better be going.”
He nodded. “Right, right. See you tomorrow?”
She smiled. “We have Potions first, don’t we?”
“Yeah, we do.” He slipped an arm through hers and escorted her back to about three corridors away from Gryffindor Tower, where he gave her a quick hug and then vanished almost before she could catch her breath.
Quickly, Lily pushed the portrait open (Greek fire), and was faced with a scraggle of first years, terribly desperate because they had just figured out how to stop up three bathtubs quite effectively, and, as Lily discovered when she entered the bathroom, they’d also forgotten to turn the water off…
Halloween was that Monday, and the feast was terrific; the usual bats everywhere, the shimmering, sparkling candles, the jack-o-lanterns at the tables, placed at two-foot intervals along the white tablecloth, the orange and black decorations, and the sprinkled, iced cookies and pies that had been made in the shape of traditional Halloween pumpkins and bats. There were also crystal bowls of colored pudding, but Eva and Lily ‘forced’ themselves to confiscate James’ and Sirius’ when they got a ‘food fight’ look on their faces.
Somewhere in the middle of the evening, James leaned over to Lily. “Lil, Amanda told me that you got a letter from Snape.”
“She did, did she?”
“So, what was in it?”
“That’s for me to know and you to wonder about.”
“Demon.”
“I know.”
When Lily looked up, she met two terribly angry eyes. Though Lily had been sure she didn’t care about James at all, Serena was still jealously eyeing Lily.
When the feast was over (around ten-thirty), one thousand stuffed students made their lethargic ways to their respective common rooms. Most of them fell asleep right away, even though they’d been given all of next morning’s classes off, but Lily stayed awake, thinking, half-dreaming, and watching a mist cloud up the window in her dormitory.
